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All I Want Is Nothing

I went back this morning and raised the bass per Tony, cut back some of the reverb kind of per Tony, brought the organ down. I think that the song is improved but there are still things not to like. Kick drum may be coming across too loud, for instance. Any impressions are appreciated.

https://soundcloud.com/sunset-poet-of-texas/all-i-want-is-nothing

I spent 4+ months adding production to this. I'm better at it, but not good. Doesn't sound too bad through my Yamahas, Ok through headphones, but has issues through my Bose computer speakers. Gonna take it to the F150 studio tomorrow.

Before I upload to DKid, I was looking for any impressions/feedback that anyone might like to offer.

Thanks
Marty[i][/i]

Did you change the tempo? Seems more lively than I remember... That's a good thing.

This is probably going to sound quite "typical" of me lol, but I think the entire mix needs a fuller bottom end. Is there a bass in the mix?

Still a good song

It was just A GV before, done at a recording studio. I did this one at home on my own DAW and added several things
There is bass in the mix in the choruses. I think that it may get overshadowed by the organ. I turned it up to where I could hear it in the headphones and the Yamahas, but I was "tuned-in" to it so I may not have turned it up enough.

My truest test is the F150 (truck cabin). Haven't done that yet. I'll set the bass and treble at 12noon. If the bass still sounds light, I'll try bringing it up and taking the organ down.

Thanks for your suggestion.

Marty

I really like this song. This runs along the vein that I write from. This has a great feel. The organ and your voice really define the character of this.
Very nice!!
Good stuff.............
-T

Very nice of you to say. Thank you.
Marty

Hey Marty....nice work here....shows the work you put in....clarity....and I thought I heard this before????

The hook shines in this version for sure

Thank you very much John.
Marty

Very pretty, Marty.

Your songs always make me feel stuff.

Procol Harum fan? The organ reminds me of Matthew Fisher's kind of riffage. Love it.

Mike

Mike

Thanks
Do you have any crits for the production? I value your opinion.
Not so much Procol Harum as a Seger thing for me. But yes, the organ is the main vehicle to deliver the emotion and it is probably more reminiscent of Whiter Shade than anything Seger.

Marty

I like the spare to full sound from verse to chorus and back.

But with the spare sound in the verses, I'm not sure I like the vocal double tracking in the first verse. It needs more vulnerability, there, I think.

A couple phrasings I think could be better suited for the lyric.

"When I'm not here I really don't care what goes on in your life" --try experimenting with "what goes on in your life" --sounds really sing-songy, almost happy, a little out-of-place with most of the surrounding phrases ...try holding onto "on" an extra beat and see where that leads.

"Sometimes I feel so used up, but I'm not bringing that to you" --maybe too conversationally phrased? It's all those quick notes "bringing that to you" that's creates unintended "drama" by tossing them off so fast. I would suggest experimenting by holding on to "that" and "you" longer. In the second verse, I think it works to stretch your voice just a little.

I think a (tad) softer, slightly more whispery voice could add more intimacy to the verses as well. Nothing too whispery, but like, she's right there, next to you, kinda thing. Then the contrast with the chorus vocal is even more striking. I bet you'd get an even more soulful verse/vocal sound in the process.

Just some random thoughts while I listened.

Mike

Thanks Mike. Appreciated.

Am headed out for lunch and the gym rest of the afternoon.
Tomorrow, I'm going to spend some time with what you wrote.

Marty

Nicely done, Marty...there is a feeling of serenity here...really peaceful

When someone can sing the chorus of a song after hearing it once...you got it right

Just a couple of spots where you might want to slow down the cadence a tiny bit i.e."but I'm not bringing that to you"..but that just might be me

Really like what you've done here

Steve

Thank you Steve. You and your associate put out well done songs. I appreciate your opinion very much.
Marty

Mike has given you some great advice, although it's already really good. Your voice has a very emotional feel to it that fits so well with the kind of song you write. Nice crisp production too.

Thanks Gavin. Appreciated.
Marty

Thanks Mike. Appreciate you taking a look and commenting further. I've always learned from your posts. I don't disagree with any of your comments. All valid.

The big picture on this song is that I have been going over it for 4 months. Listening to many more hours of YT regarding the DAW than actually working on the song. The instrumentation was mostly fairly easy and fun. The vocals otoh...I struggled and threw everything that I had done to a point out and started over appx every two weeks. I' d finish a section and think it was okay and then finish another and the 2 of them coupled would be awful. Discard and repeat more times than I can remember. Always looking for that plug-in trick that would turn a ho-hum singer into a good recording. The guys on YT all say the same thing...if the vocal recording isnt good at the start, no way to pull it out of the dumpster and make it good with processing.

The gist...the vocal as it stands is hours of redo and this vocalist doesn't have any nuancing left in reserve. I can't improve on what I've done for now. By my count there are 3 separate moods in the vocals and I tried to soften in a couple of places with some air...but it sounded awful. Ultimately used automation to try to get some of that effect.

Truth is...I've redone the vox so many times that I am burnt-out on the song. Nonetheless, the substance of your comments will be committed to memory and carried forward. Thanks again.

On the "almost happy" observation. That was more-or-less on purpose. The imagined back-story of the song....is a guy who has made plans with a woman to get together for some wine and movie watching at her home one night. When he arrives, she presents a dour look on her face and then goes all drama on him talking about..."I want to make it clear to you before the night goes any further that I dont have a place in my life for a relationship right now. I'm just not ready for that."

Getting tattooed across the forehead with that upon arrival annoys him a bit for a couple of reasons. #1 She is not all that she thinks she is anyways. #2 He knows that there are people that she would not be saying that to, but the opposite. To her, he is filler. To him, she is too.

Truth is, he has no aims or emotional investment in her. So after being squared up on her version of how-it-has-to-be...he gives her his version of how-it-is. And to emphasize the point he delivers it a little bit flippant, playful, "happy," tip-toe-ish and moving towards mild sarcasm.

Notwithstanding all of that...thank you very much for sharing your thoughts with me.

Marty

Thanks, Marty. I like that your songs are oft times parts of stories, and so have specific POVs from specific characters. It makes for lots of details, and not the usual ones, usually.

As a listener of the song without the larger context, there was a bit of the "I'm Not In Love by 10cc" effect at work, in that I was thinking, "he actually might really have feelings for this woman but may not be aware of them" --inspite of what he is saying to her face.

Your music and vocal really goes far to sell his breeziness in the verses and earnestness in the chorus.

Stepping away from whatever I'm working on, for a bit, has always helped me get a more objective view.

Mike

Thanks Mike.
I like writing to situational scenarios and then hoping to have a hook show up in the process.
I'd like for my songs to "connect" to as many listeners as realistically possible....but if they don't that is a shortcoming that I'm okay with.
Any song that I write is a tree deep in the forest and it's highest realistic purpose is saving me money on therapy.

Have a relaxing Sunday.

Marty

Sounding better each time, did you change up the vocal you did in a studio.? Sounds a little different, some good suggestions in this thread, I still dig this song and "All I Want Is Nothing" plays in my head for some time after listening. I still have a full-time job so I'm part time with this music thing, but I step away sometimes from a project then come back and have another go at it. Sometimes changing a few words makes all the difference. I'm still re-writing the chorus to a song I posted here and so far, zilch. Changed up the chorus to a song I wrote in the late 80's just a couple months ago, it might be the next one I get Demo'd. So, if you feel those suggestions people have made are valid, walk away for a while it does get tiring working on something over and over. I'm no critic but I won't write anything about a song that isn't sincere.

Thanks Chester.
I did the studio recording early on and when I tried to ramp it up with instruments, there were things that needed changing so I did it all at home. Studio time for the time I put in would have been 10k plus just on the vocal redos.

As one DAW YouTube mentor put it...."I can sing through a decent $150 mic and then sing the same thing through a $1500 mic...and it still sounds like me."

Dealing with my vocals is the one thing about all this that I like the least, but it's still better than trying to deal with "vocalists." At least the ones in my league and sphere.

At this point I need a new song landscape to look at, so I'm dusting off a song that I wrote about 20 years ago. Over the years, I've gone back and rearranged it and worked at the vocals, so it should be less of a struggle than this last one. As you suggest, hopefully having stepped away for long periods of time will be of benefit.

Thanks again,
Marty