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#1183907 01/20/23 06:42 PM
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Hi Everyone..............here's a song that I would love to hear your comments on. As usual, your first impressions are most welcome.
Thanks!

“Turn Off These Lights”
By Tom Tognaci

https://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=12366111

I’m sleeping with the lights on
I keep the radio on
‘Cause I can’t stand this empty room
You once wrote, your leaving
And all the pain I’m grieving
Will be behind me, one day soon

But, still I can’t forget you
No matter how I try
I wish I could forget you, and turn off these lights

Most nights, I’m up all hours
Wondering if she’s ours
Was that new baby in your plan?
Now, I know I’ve been drinking
But, how long were you thinking
I was more a tool, than your man?

But, still I can’t forget you
No matter how I try
I wish I could forget you, and turn off these lights

Thoughts bump in the night, they circle me like a starving shark
While memories, of her, bite at me from the dark…….
……and so,

I’m sleeping with the lights on
I keep the radio on
‘Cause I can’t stand this empty room
Your favorite song keeps playing
And, while it’s just me saying
I’d swear I’m smelling your perfume

But, still I can’t forget you
No matter how I try
I wish I could forget you, and turn off these lights

Last edited by IronKnee; 01/20/23 06:49 PM.
1 member likes this: Guy E. Trepanier
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Another great song, Tom. I thought it was going to be a standard "She left me and I miss her" lyric with the neat extra touch of having to leave the light on, and then you threw in that surprise of the baby. I expected to hear more about that later on. Regardless, it's really good and the heartfelt delivery is outstanding imo.

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Online Happy
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Very cool rhythm! smile

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Originally Posted by Gavin Sinclair
Another great song, Tom. I thought it was going to be a standard "She left me and I miss her" lyric with the neat extra touch of having to leave the light on, and then you threw in that surprise of the baby. I expected to hear more about that later on. Regardless, it's really good and the heartfelt delivery is outstanding imo.


Originally Posted by JAPOV
Very cool rhythm! smile

Thanks guys..................I can always count on you two!!

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Great energy in this Tom.


If writing ever becomes work I think I'm going to have to stop

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Originally Posted by John Voorpostel
Great energy in this Tom.

Thanks John.............it's always good to hear from you!

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Hi Tom!

Love the vibe you have going on with this song. Vocals are so sincere. This song could be produced similar to Dolly Parton's Jolene--has that feel and potential. I thought your verse line: (4th vs1) line might be better not saying "once wrote" as that feels more distant past, something more that says "And then you wrote you're leaving." (to that effect)?

Lots of potential with this'n!

steady-eddie

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Hi Tom. The way you do this reminds me of Gordon Lightfoot.
Great movement with it. I like how you rise up in the bridge.
Lovely song.

Vic


It's never too late? Yes it is, so do it now.

If, given time, a monkey can write the complete works of Shakespeare maybe there's hope for me.

http://store.cdbaby.com/cd/vicarnold2

http://www.soundclick.com/vicarnold

http://soundcloud.com/vic-arnold

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Tom,

I like the verses and the vibe to the whole thing, with the exception of a few mix issues I noticed(not that mix is focused on here). The chorus just does not seem to really go anywhere, maybe introduce another chord to adjust the melody? The verses are really strong.

The mix issue was the vocal mic being up loud enough to hear you breathing. If you go back and silence everything on the vocal track that is not active vocal, it would take care of that......and less noise in an acoustic track is always a good thing.

Love the universal theme.

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Originally Posted by E Swartz
Hi Tom!

Love the vibe you have going on with this song. Vocals are so sincere. This song could be produced similar to Dolly Parton's Jolene--has that feel and potential. I thought your verse line: (4th vs1) line might be better not saying "once wrote" as that feels more distant past, something more that says "And then you wrote you're leaving." (to that effect)?

Lots of potential with this'n!

steady-eddie
Hi SE...........thanks for the feedback. It's always good to hear from you.

Originally Posted by Vicarn
Hi Tom. The way you do this reminds me of Gordon Lightfoot.
Great movement with it. I like how you rise up in the bridge.
Lovely song.

Vic

Thanks, Vic.........Gordon has always been one of my Fav artists. Thanks for the kind words.

Originally Posted by maccharles
Tom,

I like the verses and the vibe to the whole thing, with the exception of a few mix issues I noticed(not that mix is focused on here). The chorus just does not seem to really go anywhere, maybe introduce another chord to adjust the melody? The verses are really strong.

The mix issue was the vocal mic being up loud enough to hear you breathing. If you go back and silence everything on the vocal track that is not active vocal, it would take care of that......and less noise in an acoustic track is always a good thing.

Love the universal theme.

Hi Mac.............thanks for stopping by. I do like the chorus as it simply reflects the intrinsic nature of the situation.
I appreciate you listening and commenting. Always good food for thought.



And thanks to all who have listened!
-Tom


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