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#1174723 03/11/21 12:50 PM
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Last edited by Irwin; 03/11/21 12:51 PM.
Irwin #1174840 03/12/21 11:39 PM
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There is very little movement in this song which makes it difficult to keep the listeners attention.

Steve


VNORTH2
Irwin #1174844 03/13/21 03:39 AM
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Irwin! Where you been man!? smile

This one sounds to me like it was hatched too soon lol, you've definitely posted better. The concept is obviously there, keep working it!

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Irwin Offline OP
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Originally Posted by VNORTH2
There is very little movement in this song which makes it difficult to keep the listeners attention.

Steve


Thank you Steve!.

JAPOV #1175261 03/25/21 01:45 AM
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Originally Posted by JAPOV
Irwin! Where you been man!? smile

This one sounds to me like it was hatched too soon lol, you've definitely posted better. The concept is obviously there, keep working it!


l a okay thank you, I do appreciate your comment/feedback. Thanks a lot.

Irwin

Irwin #1175273 03/25/21 10:06 AM
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lol, gotta love the question... "Anything bad about this song" lol ahh cmon man, just let me be NOT bad.... lol

You seem like a nice guy Irvin. I dont think anybody here understands the genre. It sounds like r&b hip hopish to me, but It be helpful to know what types of songs you are trying for. If you post some of your favorite tracks in that style, it would be easier to offer advice.

Heres what I do know.... you have the one nice hook, i think the "I wanna be loved" can be effective, but you use it too much.

You need structure..... most pop songs are verse, chorus, verse chorus

You have two lines... then "I wanna be loved" two more lines "I wanna be loved"

ANd I also know you are limited by the software you are using. How can you write music if you dont know music

I think you need to collaborate with somebody who plays an instrument. You can still be the beat maker, the producer, the idea guy, but you need musical tracks. This is just a loop over and over. It might work for the style you are shooting for.

If you have any links, even if its somebody like yourself who is producing tracks, post them, so we get an idea what your trying to do.

The good thing is you are determined. You can keep the determination and use it to try other things.

Good Luck.

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Irwin Offline OP
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Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
lol, gotta love the question... "Anything bad about this song" lol ahh cmon man, just let me be NOT bad.... lol

You seem like a nice guy Irvin. I dont think anybody here understands the genre. It sounds like r&b hip hopish to me, but It be helpful to know what types of songs you are trying for. If you post some of your favorite tracks in that style, it would be easier to offer advice.

Heres what I do know.... you have the one nice hook, i think the "I wanna be loved" can be effective, but you use it too much.

You need structure..... most pop songs are verse, chorus, verse chorus

You have two lines... then "I wanna be loved" two more lines "I wanna be loved"

ANd I also know you are limited by the software you are using. How can you write music if you dont know music

I think you need to collaborate with somebody who plays an instrument. You can still be the beat maker, the producer, the idea guy, but you need musical tracks. This is just a loop over and over. It might work for the style you are shooting for.

If you have any links, even if its somebody like yourself who is producing tracks, post them, so we get an idea what your trying to do.

The good thing is you are determined. You can keep the determination and use it to try other things.

Good Luck.


Thanks a lot Fdemetrio, I have been looking for a musician for a very long time now but haven't found one who wants to work with me (collaborate) so I know I have to keep trying doing things all by myself or hire one. But yes! I am definitely trying to do my best and I am determined.

Irwin #1175533 03/31/21 10:00 AM
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Try this site Irwin.... https://www.fiverr.com/categories/music-audio

They have songwriters, beat makers, instrument people, producers, singers, you can get some very cheaply too, like 5 dollars

Ask somebody to make you a very basic piano or guitar, bass track, in your style hip hop, R&B. Tell them what you would like it to sound like, or be similar to. You can then take that, and put your own beats over it, or write your own lyric or melody, you can find a singer.

For you, i think youd be better off with a basic keyboard, bass, track, and you can add your own parts to it.

Go to session musicians section, and check off hip hop and R&B, and you will see all the available people

Maybe you pay 10 , 15 dollars for a starter track, and you will own all the rights to everything you get from them.

https://www.fiverr.com/categories/music-audio/session-musicians?source=gallery-listing

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 03/31/21 10:15 AM.
Irwin #1175577 04/02/21 12:09 PM
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I thank you so much for this information Fdemetrio. Very interested.

Irwin #1175578 04/02/21 12:31 PM
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Let me know if I can help in any way

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 04/02/21 09:10 PM.
Irwin #1175584 04/02/21 01:27 PM
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This could be a classic dance song at black nightclubs, at least what's left of them. Not that familiar with that genre, although this woman has a much lighter voice it does remind me of some of Anita Baker's stuff.

Irwin #1175610 04/03/21 01:20 PM
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The more specific you are with what you want, style, what artist you like, how slow or fast, what parts to leave out what parts to include, would be better for you. Give them specific info.

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 04/04/21 12:12 AM.
Irwin #1175611 04/03/21 01:31 PM
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Hi Irwin

I agree with the others I think its needs more structure and I think the vocals are a bit off pitch in parts. But I like where its heading.



Work for hire Producer. I will also produce and master any old/new work tapes up to demo standards. :-)
Just PM or email:

Email -- mork1976@gmail.com

Irwin #1176410 05/06/21 10:48 AM
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I like it for it's uniqueness. It feels a bit like Jazz mixed with some soul and the vocalist expresses herself quite well in a syncopated style between your music. since she provides the melody line, it can be a bit harder to maitain pitch. perjaps a melody line would help in the music. But still the lyrics and her vocals are worth keeping. not every song fits the required molds of the pop pulp crap that's out there boring so many to tears.

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Irwin Offline OP
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Originally Posted by Fdemetrio
Let me know if I can help in any way


Yes Fdemetrio, I sure can do with your help on the instrument side of things.I will be very grateful for that.

Irwin #1176634 05/16/21 05:15 PM
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Tell us how you're recording Irwin. You've obviously got some decent equipment, I think you're primarily using a keyboard... Can you load and edit MIDI files?


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