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Joined: May 2020
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https://www.reverbnation.com/pollychase/song/31973062-longing-for-homechorus: An' I'm longing for home. I'll always be longing for my home. verses: I'll be long gone tomorrow, I'll be gone 'round the bend, don't know if I'll e-ever come back here agai-ain. Just lend me a dollar an' leave me at the train, don't know if you'll ever see that dollar a-agai-ain. --- My mother was a dancer she danced from dawn to dusk, but it's ashes to ashes, it's du-ust to-to dust. Oh God made the mountains an' he made the sea, but he never made another soul more lo-ost tha-an me. --- I was born in the winter, maybe I'll die in the spring, they said that I would never amount to anything. I was born in the summer, maybe I'll die in the fall, if I can't come back a rich man hope I won't come back at all.
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Joined: Feb 2005
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Hi Polly:
Enjoyed my listen. Folksong for sure and a bit on the melancholy side. To me, the lyric has a slight but maybe imaginative conflict... in the last two verses... born winter in one... but born summer in the last. I realize it is written this way to make spring and fall work... but if you ever "re-cut" the song... see if there might be a better way to do the winter versus summer lines for clarity. Possibly turn them into questions using "If I was born..."
It is a song with "good bones" and I can imagine the Kingston Trio singing it with listeners frozen to their seats.
Best of luck with it. ----Dave
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Hi Polly:
Enjoyed my listen. Folksong for sure and a bit on the melancholy side. To me, the lyric has a slight but maybe imaginative conflict... in the last two verses... born winter in one... but born summer in the last. I realize it is written this way to make spring and fall work... but if you ever "re-cut" the song... see if there might be a better way to do the winter versus summer lines for clarity. Possibly turn them into questions using "If I was born..."
It is a song with "good bones" and I can imagine the Kingston Trio singing it with listeners frozen to their seats.
Best of luck with it. ----Dave Thanks Dave! Yes, I had worried about the winter and summer lines. Your suggestion, using "If" before the lines, would probably work. And then replace "maybe I'll die" with "maybe I'd die." I will try it!
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Polly--
I like your folk style--
I listened to several of your songs--I love folk, I wrote my version of Matty Groves--Head rolled down the hall, done in by Lord Arnold's Sword! I used to listen to Nanci Griffitn a long time ago!
Write on!
Mackie
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Polly--
Thanks for your input--Yes, me and my Fender Guitar and Amp have Murdered a few--this song was supposed to be a longing, lonesome sound; riding that Grayhound looking forward to be with my one and only!
I listened to several of your songs--I love folk, I wrote my version of Matty Groves--Head rolled down the hall, done in by Lord Arnold's Sword!
Write on!
Mackie I love the murder ballad sound. Strange coincidence -- I recently wrote my version of Matty Groves! Maybe we could both post our versions?
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Joined: Oct 2019
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Hi Polly Great "longing" lyrics - the hook has good assonance and your vocals sound great. Like Joan Baez or Joni Mitchell. I couldn't get the time signature - is there one? Seems to have extra beats in some measures and missing ones in other to me. Enjoyed the listen Paul
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Hi Polly Great "longing" lyrics - the hook has good assonance and your vocals sound great. Like Joan Baez or Joni Mitchell. I couldn't get the time signature - is there one? Seems to have extra beats in some measures and missing ones in other to me. Enjoyed the listen Paul Thank you Paul! The time signature is supposed to be 4/4 but there might be some timing mistakes. I will look out for that.
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Polly,
What a sweet sound you have--definitely reminds me of Joan Baez. I enjoyed the lyrics and song melody--I do think you could perhaps tinker with the chorus to give it more lift and identity. You have a really sweet voice!
steady-eddie
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Oh thank you steady-eddie! Never knew I sounded like Joan, what a compliment!
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Hi Songbird...............a very somber song, very pretty and thought provoking. My kind of true folk music. Could have been written in the early 1900's, just as easily as today. Love the vocal and picking.......a beautiful 1+1. -Tom
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I would just change born in summer to reborn in summer. The other thoughts might work too. Interesting comments about Joan Baez. I heard her singing your song in my head. Love the Kingston Trio too, so harmonies would be nice. Yes, good song!
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Thanks Craig!
I have already changed the summer and winter lines, according to Dave's comment, so hopefully it makes a little more sense now.
Yes, I always like to have harmonies, if possible.
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Simply beautiful. I like the "if" suggestion.
Vic
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Simply beautiful. I like the "if" suggestion.
Vic Thanks Vic! Yes I changed it to "If I was born in the summer, maybe I'd die in the fall."
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Maybe you don't need the "maybe".
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Maybe you don't need the "maybe". Maybe.
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Enjoyed this a lot. Great traditional folk sound, clean simple lines and I enjoyed your guitar interludes.
..ant
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Enjoyed this a lot. Great traditional folk sound, clean simple lines and I enjoyed your guitar interludes.
..ant Thank you!
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Hi Polly, Definitely a very nice listen. I listened to lots of folk in the late 60's to mid 70's. this one took me back there again. thanks for sharing.
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