JPF Home Page Forums Lyric and MP3 Feedback MP3 Feedback Forum All Fall Down

.Post Deleted By Kurt

Hi Kurt,

This is the most impressive song I've heard from you yet. With a jump cut in V3 we realize something akin' to Prine's 3rd person "Sam Stone" what you do in the more immediate first person: that war has devastating effects that can ripple through time and space forever. Or maybe the entire lyric is a PTSD episode or two. Or maybe he's shooting heroin from his foxhole, but I doubt that. I love that you present us with a series of images and let them do the talking.

As a musician I appreciate some little details in here too, like the helicopter sound that seems to later drive the tremolo of various instruments. The tremelo-ed instruments become linked to the helicopter, the way their story unfolds.

I also love the dedication to a pure minor modality, making that tag line both musically and lyrically really powerful.

Great work. Your best IMHO.

Mike

Love the Song Kurt AND the Vocal....
I have an entire Facebook page about NAM....lots of Original Songs.
Barry

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Hello Kurt,


H E A V Y-------------- D U T Y


Loved it all.


Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

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a beautiful dark one Kurt.I like it.Mike

That is great, Kurt. You show us rather than tell us and it feels as if you were really there, even if it's fictional. The music and recording quality is top notch as are your vocals.

If I had to suggest any changes, I would say modernize it to something more recent than Charlie and his friends. There are a lot of people around who do not know who Charlie is.

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Whoop! I also think that this is the best I heard from you. I like the darkness in it and it suits your style.
I don't know what nursery rhyme it was but I hazard to guess it was "ring a ring a roses", attributed to the plague in the UK in 1600's .
Neil young couldn't do it better.
Good one.

Vic

Kurt, a very serious topic; the Vietnam War. Lyrics are lush with visuals and puts you right there in the jungle fight.
I listened to the track 4-5 times, making notes as I listened.
I got a "Ring Around the Rosie" nursery rhyme feel in your intro and chorus which is good because basic and memorable are good things in a tune.

Your title is very good and your hook delivery is great. The hook resonates in part because of the nursery rhyme "All Fall Down" association.
Your vocal suits the tune well. I'd look at some of your phrasing, really minor.

Sonically, I'd add an actual helicopter audio in on the intro to help the listener's mind right in the place you want it.

I think you could edit your lyrics a little. For example:
"I light up a cigarette, then I hear incoming rounds"
Napalm scorches this nightmare "scene" with "hot" sizzling sounds.
Cries of the wounded are making me cringe
I could help but I dig through my bag for another syringe

Great here: "Cremate my memories, cast them all around"
Your bridge is right out of the psychedelic 60s-early 70s and fits well in the tune.
I don't play an instrument just piddle around on the piano but I thought some minors would support the dark, desperate places this tune goes.

Really enjoyed this. Thanks for sharing.

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Kurt,

This is an amazing tune. Great lyrics, production, vocals . . . everything. To my ears, it's pretty much perfect--wouldn't change a thing. Awesome work.

Regards,

Deej

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Hi again Kurt,

Another big Guy Clark fan here. Hopefully he's with Susanna now..and Townes..



Funny how media influences us..I've been so influenced by post-war movies involving characters with PTSD (going all the way back to Coming Home) and songs like Sam Stone, that I heard "nightmare" and "syringe" and immediately read the lyric that way. The "medic helping the injured and dying" didn't even occur to me 'til you mentioned it (I guess MASH wasn't a big influence on me, LOL). But the words "ashes, ashes..all fall down" seem to gain even more resonance when you consider that war may not get you while you're in it..sometimes it gets you much later.

But with the line "As I dig through my bag for another syringe" I can see how the medic reading might've been what you intended solely, since a medic, not a junkie, would worry about a clean syringe, and you were being nice to not "school" me, LOL, which was very gracious and I appreciate that!

Playing this for friends who are equally blown away..

Mike

Yes. Over here it's "Atishoo, atishoo we all fall down".

Hi Kurt:

Sorry I'm late. I enjoyed "the story behind the song nearly as much as the actual recording... but make no bones about it... this is a top notch performance to an interesting, long-dormant lyric. Like Zaneski, I liked everything about it and believe it may be one of your best. Funny how you lay a lyric down, forget about it and "discover" it years later. Super job on the vocal and finding a nursery rhyme hook as you wrote it.

This is a five on a scale of five!

Best of luck with it. Looking forward to more. ----Dave

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Is it just me or is there no longer a song here? And whatever happened to all your comments? All I see is a dot...is there anybody out there?

I couldn't delete the thread, so I deleted my part of it as best I could.

Well, I'm sure you have your reasons, Kurt, but I tracked it down anyway and watched/listened to the DI3 version on youtube. It hits hard, lyrically, musically and, in this case, visually. Dave is an amazing talent. Really well done, as I'm sure your own version is. That's what I get for being late to the dance.

Ricki

Keep Charlie in there...You are writing what you know and feel.
That's the important thing....

Kurt,

This song was already deleted when I arrived. I would have liked to hear it given the great comments. I just saw a "period" and thought it was a joke with being a very short lyric--as in "no" lyrics. After reading the posts, I see there has been some contention for reasons I have no idea as to what or why. I do wish you the best, an have certainly been a fan of your songwriting/performance abilities over the last three years.

steadward

What's the issue? Deleting everything suggests something terrible happened.

The issue is that I can't delete the whole thread...which would be way easier than going through and replacing every one of my comments with a period.

So it's a secret as to why you removed a song universally supported where a lot of people took the time to listen and leave feedback? And it's one thing to remove the link to the song, but why delete the responses to the nice people who spent their time supporting your music? A simple note as to why you needed to remove the song seems to be a fair and reasonable way to show some appreciation to everyone who spends time here helping others. It would also be nice for anyone who is new, sees this post and wonders what would cause someone to do this? I'm not new and I wonder. I noticed the dot and thought "uh oh, there's a problem" because every time in the past 20 years I can remember this happening, it was because of a nasty fight full of hateful comments.

Why don't we let people delete entire topics? Simple. It doesn't belong to you once others participate, spending time out of their day to respond and in this case listen to a once linked mp3 file. What about THEIR words? Why would we let someone delete an entire topic and censor everyone else without cause or need or even a polite explanation?

Look Kurt, you may well be the most musically supported person here by a large number of your fellow posters. With that comes a reasonable expectation that you wouldn't just bail on your friends and everyone else like you did here. It implies someone here did something wrong and deleting every single post you made looks terrible. And for what? And when I asked you about it, you just complained that you couldn't erase everyone else's words with a mass delete. Why?

Folks, this is a community with shared pages. Outside of spam or a universal request of all involved or in the cases of something really terrible, we don't delete pages and even in those cases we typically just move stuff off line. Please be considerate of the others who contribute to a discussion. If you have to remove your post for some reason and a lot of people have spent time responding, please offer at least a simple message and maybe leave up the fact that you appreciate their feedback and you're sorry circumstances required you to remove your post. People who double post by accident often let folks know what's up when they delete stuff, we see it all the time. Why all the mystery?

No mystery intended.
Sorry to have upset the emotional applecart.
I am a terrible person who doesn't deserve to be a part of this community.
Go ahead and delete any of my stuff that you deem undesirable, and block me if you want to.
I apologize for taking up your time.

Fill me in here?????
What happened and WHY....not sure what this is all about.

Someone is having a problem with their period. Well...several periods, if you look up and down the posts.

So obviously something is up. Why you keep doubling down is beyond me. It's not unreasonable to ask what is up, why your actions are out of character or to explain to everyone why we don't allow people to delete entire topics full of people's comments. When asked what was up, you deflected the question and now you're overreacting further. I don't recall any disagreement or negative back and forth with you in 15 years, and now you've escalated it into quitting under the pretense that someone is trying to delete you and kick you out as if you're suddenly a victim after 15 years of nothing but universally positive support here. What's with the martyrdom complex? Just because I initially asked what was up? It's almost like the site's perennial troll has taken over your account.

The last response from KF had the emotional maturity of someone 12. It's a tiny bit of a relief knowing that I'm not the only one who can have a bad day and react that way, but mostly it's very troubling cuz if Kurt is hurting, it's not over anything we have posted, and he will look back on this thread with much regret. We loved this song, and at the moment, I'm worried about Kurt.

Maybe it's not fictional and has brought up some emotional things? And then maybe he wanted a certain kind of response from us that contained no hint of critique? If so, Kurt, you have my sympathy.

And then maybe it is NOT Kurt responding, but someone who ran a brute force attack and obtained his password?

Kurt..we care about you..we aren't your enemy here.

I wish you all the best and I hope you feel better.

Mike

Y'all are WAY overreacting to the fact that I simply wanted my post deleted.
Nothing "bad" happened. Up until the time that I deleted my comments, it was an overwhelmingly positive experience. I was still feeling good about it even then. I wanted to take my post down. I did it the best I could.
It would probably be in the best interest of forum harmony if an administrator would just do what I was trying to do in the first place...delete this thread.
I feel like anything I say will only make things worse.
I'm done talking about it.
I hope everybody has a nice day.

Brian

My earnest suggestion...

Kurt is emphatic that he does not want this thread shown. We now seem to be contemplating mental health issues. Those can't be fixed in an internet forum. Allowing this to be a spectacle on a songwriting forum is not healthy and serves no greater purpose. I suggest granting his desire to remove the thread.

If he needs help, he can only reasonably be helped by people who can actually get in his presence. When he gets to feeling better about whatever led to this, he'll put up another song, and all this will be forgotten.

Respectfully submitted,


Martin

Moving on....

For the record, I got notice that Kurt is leaving and isn't returning. Apparently this was all part of his plan to remove his other songs but it called attention to it and I noticed so while this was being discussed, he went through and deleted many of his other songs and likely was going to remove them all (I have no idea how many, someone had simply informed me what was going on). To stop further damage to the records of this site and all the time people spent responding to and discussing those posts over 15 years, I blocked the account from being able to delete more.

I had no interest in any of this. Obviously there's much more to the story. I got a polite but patronizing note from him that he couldn't live up to the standards blah blah blah and that he wouldn't be back, meanwhile he was online deleting posts. So in 15 years I can't recall any ill will from anyone on this site towards him, actually just the opposite was the case, he was one of the most revered. His agenda is still secret but deleting posting en masse in secret is cowardly and about as passive aggressive as someone can be. Perhaps he really does has personal problems and I hope he has friends who can help him if that is the case, anyone here who knows him outside of this board should check up on him. If that isn't the case, then this is simply a middle finger to everyone here for an as yet unknown reason. If others out there know and aren't telling and you plan to join him, please be decent enough to just be upfront about it. I've had plenty of people here tell me off over the years, some still post here often. Outside of the well known board troll who lives under a nearby bridge and has been banned each time he outs himself which is often, I think we've only banned 8 real people in 20 years (and frankly I think 6 of them were the same person) and 2 of them literally ASKED me to please do it (yes, that is a thing). People are free to argue, get mad, dislike who they want and as long as nasty personal attacks aren't hurled around, all are welcome.

To his credit, Kurt did none of that, but destroying posts is worse in a way. So for those wondering about Kurt, you'll have to check in on him elsewhere. (And you should to make sure this isn't a suicidal thing). Sadly we've had some of those before and perhaps there's time to intercede if that is the case. I hold no ill will, why would I? We never even had an argument in 15 years that I can recall. He's welcome back anytime as long as the goal isn't to delete stuff again. I've seen about everything in 32 years from actual stalkers to death threats (too many to count) to illegal activity to scams to raging drunks/drug addicts to A1 Asses and every version of troll there is. None of that seems to apply to Kurt. This is another case of "just when you think you've seen it all, you haven't...."

Brian