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::: What More Can I Do :::

Posted By: Guy E. Trepanier

::: What More Can I Do ::: - 11/27/20 06:19 PM

Here is one of my songs.
Rough demo: My voice + ukulele

https://www.soundclick.com/music/songInfo.cfm?songID=14149842

What More Can I do
____________________________________________
© Words and music: Guy E. Trépanier, 2019.
All rights reserved by Guy E. Trépanier.

Intro: 8 bars (key of C) tempo: 96 (6/8)

What more can I do
To make you understand
How much I love you
I want to be your man

What should I do
To stay close to you
Tell me what more can I do ...

What more can I say
To open up your heart
Maybe I could say
We'll never do apart

What should I say
To hold you my way
Tell me what more can I say ...

Something has got to be true
Something as got to be fair
Something has got to be true and be fair ...

Someone has got to be true
Someone has got to be fair
Someone has got to be true and be fair ...


Instrumental: 8 bars

What more can I do
To make you understand
How much I love you
I want to be your man

What should I do
To stay close to you
Tell me what more can I do ...

Tell me what more can I do

Guy E. Trépanier #433
Melody: oct - dec 2019. Lyrics: oct - dec 2019.
Posted By: E Swartz

Re: ::: What More Can I Do ::: - 11/27/20 11:20 PM

Hi Guy.

I think you have a delightful melody here. It reminds me of a folk-early Pop song "Pre-British invasion" song from a more innocent time. I could see several directions arrangement-wise. My main sug is with your Bridge. I feel lyrically there you could improve the song by not re-iterating the 3rd line--not needed and taking away from a more potentially/powerful bridge resolve. You might even experiment there with a more specific statement? Phonetically, I also feel with this "older fashioned" vibe that the 2nd bridge line begs to rhyme immediately with the 1st line. Then, have the 3rd bridge line make a dramatic (non rhyming) reflective/modifying statement--this is the "climax" of your song. Your solo following is perfect, then we're ready to return to the song's ending having made the fun detour. This will allow the bridge to create song build and divide the song better with that needed break--JMO, keep or sweep.....

Great start, nice classic chord progression,

steady-eddie
Posted By: IronKnee

Re: ::: What More Can I Do ::: - 12/03/20 04:24 AM

Hey there Guy..................a very pleasant tune, in deed. Very simple, with a clear lovely message.
Thanks guy............
-Tom
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