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Heart Broke In LA

Posted By: Two Singers

Heart Broke In LA - 10/13/19 04:08 AM

Hi Folks ...

Al David here after a very long absence from the site (several years). This song was originally an instrumental track I wrote about a year ago. My friend, Greg Johnson, asked if he could add a lyric and vocal track. Of course I immediately said, "You're dang right you can!". Greg is a marvelous vocalist and lyricist. When he sent me the finished vocal version, I was stunned with what he had done ... it was fabulously great!

Anyway, here's Greg singing his vocal version of my original instrumental. Any and all comments are welcome. Greg did all the vocals, including the fabulous background vocals on the chorus. All the vocals and lyric are Greg - the music is mine. He's a singer extraordinaire - I'm just a guitar picker who writes an occasional lyric and sings when there's no one else to do so and the band is desperate. Hope you enjoy ...

Alan


Heart Broke In LA


Here's The Lyric:

Heart Broke In LA – Lyric

(v1)
She saw the famous sign, when she was only nine
From the backseat of the car
It spelled out Hollywood, she swore some day she would
Come back here to be a star
The place where dreams come true, and stars fall every day
The place where players come to play, welcome to LA

(v2)
Westbound at twenty-one, she chased the setting sun
Left the town she called a curse
Her whole world in her car, new clothes and old guitar
Two thousand dollars in her purse
She would feel things out, and find a place to stay
Destiny was on the way, to meet her in LA

CHORUS
Welcome to LaLa Land, the shiny sea and sand
Have a drink we’ll show you in
The night shift’s kept your part, to see you have the heart,
But you might need to show some skin
Before we let you in

(v3)
She thought she’d played the game, the phone call never came
She started dancing at some bar
Some guys were pretty nice, found trouble once or twice
She never thought she’d fall this far
She cruelly seen the world where players came to play
Where broken dreams are on display
She’s heart broke in LA

Heart broke in LA

(c) 2019 Greg Johnson, Alan D. David, BMI
Posted By: Dave Rice

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/13/19 02:13 PM

Hi Al:

Welcome home, friend. This is a "stunner" and has that "Eagle-esque" vibe to it. Marvelous work. Pitch that thing... 'cause it is so-o-o ready for prime time. Thanks for sharing.

All my best, ----Dave
Posted By: Gavin Sinclair

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/13/19 02:22 PM

I thought of the Eagles too smile

Great music, lyric, performance and production. Everything else needs work LOL. Seriously enjoyed this. Great song!
Posted By: Michael Zaneski

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/13/19 04:57 PM

Hi Al, and Greg..

Wow!

Great marriage of lyric and music with a dynamite vocal performance. Nothing to not like here.

This reminds me of ELO if they were channeling The Eagles.

Al, I was waiting for a minor chord with an added two (or second). I remember you remarked over a decade ago that was your favorite chord!

Great hearing from you and to know you're still getting it done. smile

Mike
Posted By: Two Singers

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/13/19 08:46 PM

HI Dave!

So nice to be back. Been away for a very long time -0 you know why! Thanks a bunch for dropping in to listen to this. So glad you liked it! Greg is a great lyricist and fabulous vocalist. What it would be like to have a voice like that ...sigh! We appreciate all those kind words. We've done a little bit of promoting the song - we'll see how it goes. Again many thanks and great to hear from you! Wishing you the very best ...

Alan
Posted By: Two Singers

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/13/19 08:48 PM

Gavin ...

Many thanks for the visit and listen. Sure do appreciate your kindness to our song. We'll work on that other stuff!!! The instrumental version came out pretty good, but Greg took it to a whole new level and dimension with his lyric and vocal. Again, thanks so much! Best to you ...

Alan
Posted By: Two Singers

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/13/19 08:56 PM

Mike ...

Hey! Thanks so much, my friend. Delighted you enjoyed the song. I hadn't thought about ELO, but you're right about that analogy ... ELO channeling the Eagles. The instrumental version came to together pretty quickly. Greg is very meticulous with his lyrics and vocals, so it takes him a but longer. But it's always well worth the wait. We've done three or four collabs and we're working on three more. If he needs to change anything in the instrumental version to make it work with the lyric and/or vocal, I give him free latitude to do so as I know it will only make the song better. I trust him completely and he never disappoints.

Man ... you have a great memory! And yes, I still love the minor with the added 9th (or add 2). It has a resonance that leaves the song with an opening for resolution that the listener can create for him/her/self. And don't worry ... you'll be hearing some of that as I continue to post. That element is always in my hip pocket!

Thanks again! Wishing you everything good ...


Alan
Posted By: JaneK

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/14/19 09:18 PM

Great song - I really enjoyed the guitar playing and the vocal performance. I am glad I stopped by to listen.
Posted By: E Swartz

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/14/19 11:44 PM

Hey Two-S,

Love, loved this. Music marries the lyrics very well. These lyrics had me riveted! What a great opening line with the sign and her being nine--absolutely grabs your attention with a great interesting line--and that's what good lyrics do--peak your interest. Given the story holds you so well, I have one production sug, (for what it's worth), I'd like to see the first guitar solo break attack, but retreat sooner and shorten.......as I felt impatient to get to the anticipated tragic story's ending. Then once we've tasted the tragedy, maybe give the longer lead guitar solo to the outro and fade to "carry" the song out--JMHO.

Great expressive vocals as well!

steady-eddie
Posted By: Deej56

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/15/19 04:13 AM

Alan,

Beautifully done, wonderfully put together—love Greg’s vocal on this one. Excellent tune! Great work on this one.

All the best,

Deej
Posted By: Guy E. Trepanier

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/16/19 10:50 PM

Great song!
Everything works fine in this song.

Have fun!
Posted By: Kristi McKeever

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/20/19 07:27 PM

Nicely drawn story with lots of great visuals. I like how the guitar/vocal highlights emotional points in the story.

This line is so devastating and packs a punch: “She cruelly seen the world where players came to play/Where broken dreams are on display.”

I enjoyed the music and vocals...overall really well delivered!

Kristi
Posted By: Two Singers

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/21/19 05:41 PM

Originally Posted by JaneK
Great song - I really enjoyed the guitar playing and the vocal performance. I am glad I stopped by to listen.



Hi Jane ...

Thank you very much. Glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for your time to listen and comment. I appreciate that very much.

Alan
Posted By: Two Singers

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/21/19 05:52 PM

Originally Posted by E Swartz
Hey Two-S,

Love, loved this. Music marries the lyrics very well. These lyrics had me riveted! What a great opening line with the sign and her being nine--absolutely grabs your attention with a great interesting line--and that's what good lyrics do--peak your interest. Given the story holds you so well, I have one production sug, (for what it's worth), I'd like to see the first guitar solo break attack, but retreat sooner and shorten.......as I felt impatient to get to the anticipated tragic story's ending. Then once we've tasted the tragedy, maybe give the longer lead guitar solo to the outro and fade to "carry" the song out--JMHO.

Great expressive vocals as well!

steady-eddie


Hi Eddy ...

Sure do appreciate your listen and the time and thought you gave to your review. Greg is a wonderful lyricist and, obviously, a gifted vocalist. We've been collaborating off and on for the past three years or so. He lives in California and I live in Alabama. So, it takes a little time with the back and forth samples and comments. But I love collabbing with him. He's a really nice man and a real treat to work with.

Glad you like that opening grabber ... it's a great line from Greg that sets the tone from the very beginning. As far as the guitar instrumental you referenced ... I'll pass that on to Greg. I write and record all the music and then send him the track as an MP3 attachment. I'll send him several versions of lead guitar track and tell him mix and match as he sees fit with his vocal and lyric. We do appreciate your insight and suggestions. We always enjoy new things to consider!

Again, than you very much. Wishing you the best ...

Alan
Posted By: Two Singers

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/21/19 05:53 PM

Originally Posted by Deej56
Alan,

Beautifully done, wonderfully put together—love Greg’s vocal on this one. Excellent tune! Great work on this one.

All the best,

Deej



Hey Deej!

Good to see you over here. As always, appreciate your comments and thoughts very much. We're delighted you enjoyed it. Thanks for reminding us! Best to you ...

ALan
Posted By: Two Singers

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/21/19 05:54 PM

Originally Posted by Guy E. Trepanier
Great song!
Everything works fine in this song.

Have fun!



Thank you very much, guy! We appreciate those very nice words! Wishing you the best ...

Alan
Posted By: Two Singers

Re: Heart Broke In LA - 10/21/19 05:59 PM

Originally Posted by Kristi McKeever
Nicely drawn story with lots of great visuals. I like how the guitar/vocal highlights emotional points in the story.

This line is so devastating and packs a punch: “She cruelly seen the world where players came to play/Where broken dreams are on display.”

I enjoyed the music and vocals...overall really well delivered!

Kristi



Hi Kristi ...

It's been, seemingly, forever since I last heard from. It's been several years, at least. Thank you for dropping in to have a listen. And yes, that line is riveting. It brings into perspective the tragedy that envelopes a lot of aspiring performers when it doesn't work out. Instead of the glory of success, the darkness of the users raises its ugly head. Greg knows hoiw to out words together that will definitely grab your attention.

Many thanks for the visit, listen and comments. Sure do appreciate all that! Best to you ...

Alan
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