NOTE: I need serious input here and quickly. Hopefully I get some quick responses here because I am on a deadline of having this completed before the Holiday weekend is up..So if you listen to this ALL THOUGHTS ARE WELCOME.

Though I am a Country Artist, I am also known throughout the nation as The Credit Cowboy, Credit Expert on GO COUNTRY RADIO 105 FM Los Angeles on The Mortgage Mom Radio Show. I come on every 2-3 months. Since I am a guest on the program I got a super duper low rate for my first commercial/ad to go on each week whether on the Show or not. This show broadcasts in all of Southern California at 7 am Saturdays.

Originally I wrote this Jingle for my website ASKTHECREDITCOWBOY.COM. and tonight added my voiceover (first ever)...This was a requested Radio Commerical to bring value to the show & bring me new clients in need of credit repair to qualify for Home Loans. The Host gets the loans so they make money as well, that is why the great deal...

I have to have this into GO COUNTRY RADIO in about 2-3 days, I want input on the tune, voiceover quality, and also need others ears about where the music sits in regard to the voiceover. I know music mixing, but this is a new arena for me

I already get business from this radio , but this can bring me extra local business to pay for my Music Recording & Video of my new song "First Love, Last Love"

Anyways, be honest & helpful...Is anything distracting? Something too loud, too soft? Bring it and bring it now....This is happening one way or another, I just am in unchartered waters here for a radio commercial and need other sets of ears, like quickly

Thanks ya'll CLICK BELOW...

Ask The Credit Cowboy Jingle & Radio Commercial

Link isn’t working bud...

Fixed it sorry

Honestly... I think it moves a little slow for "commercial radio" and the "ya'll come back now" is just way too cliche. I think you really need to pick up the pace and end it like you own it.... I'M THE CREDIT COWBOY!

The Jingle was done a year ago, and when I went in Pro tools it is gone...LOL


I am gonna just edit out the Ya'll come back now ya hear. And go straight to the website...Others didn't like that as well, so general consensus is dump it

I don't have time to redo the jingle in 2 days....Thanks for listening....

Aw, humm,
Sounded OK to me. I would go with it as is. Good luck.

Steve-


Check your PM's.

I agree that taking out the "Y'all come back now, you hear" is definitely a good idea.It does seem like it could be a little faster from about 19 seconds when you are listing the things you'll check, but that's more about being able to say more in a limited time. If that's not a concern, then to me it sounds just fine.

I'd pull up the volume of the music a notch Steve.

Best, John

John, I believe you do jingles alot correct? This is my first

Are you talking about the music up while I'm speaking as well?

Just the background music up a notch. The speaking level should be fine the way it is. This is just my preference.

John

Steve,

I agree with John. The music should go up just a bit. Your voice is fine the way it is

Music up a touch, even when you're speaking but a touch more when your not speaking.
If time allows, speak a little faster too.

Vic

New version is up...Got rid of the Ya'll & raised music. Changed the script slightly and spoke faster with more energy

https://soundcloud.com/stevealtonian/ask-the-credit-cowboy-jingle-radio-commercial-final-mastered

I am listening in my studio with my monitors. Sounds great! I think you got it!