And what about all of the brands below that are impossible to find in any (self respecting) grocery store. .
(the next 2 are real old jokes that are not mine, and the red hen reference is not mine either)
Prostitooties - they don't snap they don't crackle, they don't pop, they just bang all day.
- you throw away the cereal and eat the box.
or how about..
Tweeties (insert you favorite Trump joke here)
(isn't that what stormy once said?)
Huckabee's - ignores, spins, disclaims, or makes excuses for the vile repugnant and disgusting things that come out of tweetees.
(note Huckabee's is not served at the Red Hen café because they believe eggs and children should be cage free)
Original Ghoolianies - much like alphabits but with 9's and 1's so that almost every sentence has 911 in it
New Improved lawyer Ghoolianies - less 9' and 1's and a lot more L's I's E's
Milaninas - what's in it? I don't really care, do you?
Doctor Jackson's physical flakes - claims the net weight is 239 pounds (yeh right)
GOPies - once the Flake is gone, there will be nothing but nuts left.
Mitch's Mconneloonees - no matter how long the cereal soaks in milk, it will never be half as soggy and droopy looking as the face on the box. (caution: if you are hungry but the president is not a republican, you might have to wait a year) The box says 'Free copy of the constitution inside' but its only the 2nd amendment. If you want the rest of the constitution, you should buy the box labeled "Free toilet paper inside".
Pithy Pruits - no one knows if they snap crackle or pop because of the office sound proofing bought at taxpayers expense.
Kinda Clean Coalies - sure its not that clean and it will stain your clothes, your house, your air, and your lungs, but if you consume 6 tons of it, you can keep a coal miner employed for almost an hour!https://www.eia.gov/coal/annual/
Swampies - despite claims of being drained, every week it keeps getting fuller.
Spicy O's - It’s the one with the picture of Melisa McCarthy on the box.
Donnie's Cheery Oval Orifices - You may never have actually purchased any; I never did either, but somehow our cabinet is full them. And every box comes with one of these trading cards
Orifice Famous saying
Scott Pruitt EPA stands for Environment Pimping Agency
Ben Carson Have hammer and stethoscope will travel
Steve Menucian Solar eclipse near fort Knox?
My wife and I should travel there at huge taxpayer expense
to make sure the gold isn't rotting or anything.
There's lots of others to talk about but to chew or talk about them you have to be willing to bite your tongue.