"I Can't Stop Drinking About You" by David Gill (c) 2017

We had it all
but now it's gone
The same old sh!t
the same old song
No matter what I try to do
I can't stop drinking about you

Another night
so many bars
the same old hurt
the same old scars
No matter if I've had a few
I can't stop drinking about you


This beer don't seem
to ease the pain or
help me to forget
But every time I
hear your name
I take another sip


I said some words
you said 'em, too
the same old me
the same old you
No matter what we've both been through
I can't stop drinking about you



This beer don't seem to
ease the pain or
help me to forget
But every time I
hear your name
I take another sip


We had it all
but now it's gone
The same old sh!t
the same old song
No matter what I try to do
I can't stop drinking about you

Great hook David!
Yeah we've heard them and written them but still they keep coming.
Good lyric
Travis

Liked that hook also; so much so, that I thought you should use it at the end of each verse!
As an example:

We had it all but now it's gone
The same old sh!t the same old song
You left me here to live alone
Sitting by a silent phone
So I down a few
I can't stop drinking about you

Best of luck!
-Mike

David,

It's a great, great line, and everything else about the lyrics are solid. I like the structure of the verses, and would err on the side of underusing that great hook--keep it in the chorus, only, IMHO. But as is always the case when you read lyrics, the devil is in the melody. I'm guessing you may want to tweak a word or line or two as it hooks into song--but an easy adjustment whichever way the melody takes you. The lyrics are strong enough to go wherever the music takes them. Nice read.

Regards,

Deej

David

Decent hook...no doubt.
I can hear the music as I read your lyrics.
Always a good sign.

Good luck with it.

Larry

Travis, Mike, Deej and Larry....

All good stuff! Thank you so much for taking the time to read and crit. This is certainly a very rough draft of an idea I've been toying with for quite some time. I agree that perhaps I am under-utilizing the hook just a bit. I'll tweak and repost and see how it turns out.

Thanks again!

Peace,

Dave

Why not start the Chorus with that Hook as well as finishing with it

Also Try a Temporary key change on the Chorus that would make the Chorus stand out


I would keep it away from the Verse

Great Idea Best Wishes with it

Thanks for the sugg, Matt! I gave this one another go and think I may have screwed it all up but.... Take another read, if you please.. :-)

Peace,

Dave