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Mutlu
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/15/24 07:08 PM
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Leafs
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/05/24 01:49 PM
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Howdy folks, I got one back from my new co-writer Aaron Steenhoven. I did most of the lyrics while he did the music and vocals. Thanks for your time and suggestions. "In the Back Pew" http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=11918923"In the Back Pew" Words and music (C) 2012 Darin Martin and Aaron Steenhoven Vocals by Aaron Steenhoven Verse One My heart was empty But I kept on searchin' For the final pieces That were missin' I wasn't thinkin' I did anything wrong I was just tryin' to find A place where I belonged Pre-Chorus When I stepped inside I found hope beyond this life Chorus I sat in the back pew Where I heard the good news I was holdin' on to nothin' But You gave me somethin' To wash away everything And make me brand new I could feel the love healing Who I once was Like a train running through my heart If grace changed me I know it can change you Never out of reach in the back pew Verse Two My eyes are open to see Where I'm goin' My thoughts are clear to know What I'm doin' It doesn't matter where I've been I'm not the same person I was then As I stand here looking back I just want to tell the world that Chorus Instrumental Break Chorus - Darin
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Hi Darin, I like most of the music but whatever that is at the beginning needs to go IMO. I like the singer and I think it's a cool melody. I LOVE the title!!! I'm going to be honest I think the lyric needs work. I'll note why I think that below. Before you read anymore remember this is JUST my opinion. Verse One My heart was empty But I kept on searchin' maybe say what you were searching for?For the final pieces That were missin' I wasn't thinkin' I did anything wrong This makes me what to know what you did wrong. I was just tryin' to find A place where I belonged I think the verse is too vague. I'm not feeling connected. Pre-Chorus When I stepped inside I found hope beyond this life Chorus I sat in the back pew Where I heard the good news I like the chorus until the next line and I'll put in bold type the reason I think it starts to fall apart.I was holdin' on to nothin' But You gave me somethin' To wash away everythingAnd make me brand new I could feel the love healing Who I once was Like a train running through my heart If grace changed me I know it can change you Never out of reach in the back pew I really like this line. Verse Two I feel like this verse is too vague also.My eyes are open to see Where I'm goin' My thoughts are clear to know What I'm doin' It doesn't matter where I've been I'm not the same person I was then As I stand here looking back I just want to tell the world that Chorus Instrumental Break Chorus I know you're writing to pitch for films and that it needs to be universal but I feel like this is too vague. Dottie
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Thank-you for your suggestions Dottie. They are really helpful!!
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DARIN--
Along with DOTTIES SUGS:
I OFFER CH CHANGES AS OPTIONS
Chorus HERE in the back pew I heard the good news LORD I’M INTO BELIEVIN’ YOU SHOWED ME THE WAY To wash away MY SINS And make LIFE brand new I ALREADY feel love healing YOUR grace changed me I’M A WHOLE MAN AGAIN HERE in the back pew
Mackie
Last edited by Mackie H.; 09/30/12 05:52 PM.
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Hi Darin,
Good sounding song and message from the two of you. Would make a great P&W song. Nice work.
Stevie
I'm the only person here who is not unique.
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I don't like the annoying intro thing either. It might be alright if were just pushed way back in the mix.
I think the lyrics is fine. I don't want to know what someone did before they were saved. That's one of the biggest problems with Xtian music that I see pitched. It sounds more like bragging about how bad someone was. When I converted, I didn't think I had done anything wrong. The self righteous are some of the hardest to reach.
I like the music especially the big drum.
An ego under its own power travels assback. ~ Smarticus
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