JPF Home Page Forums Lyric and MP3 Feedback Lyric Feedback Forum 3 "DO SOME DON'TS"

{Ah, back from a Full Evening of Shut-Eye...much-needed! I've been in a particularly Randy Kinda Mood, all week long...so herewegooo again...}

Your Mama Often Scolded You
Your Daddy Spanked-You Some
Tried to Slow The Side of You
That Wanted Lots-More-Fun...

But I Can See There In Your Eyes
A New Day's Gonna Dawn
'Cause Honey, With You By-My-Side
We're Gonna Get-It-On...

(CHORUS)
Hey, DO SOME DON'TS
Enjoy The World!
DO What-You've-ALWAYS-WANTED
'Long-As NO-ONE'S-GETTIN'-HURT!
Baby DO SOME DON'TS
You'll SOON Get Cured
CURIOSITY'S HEALTHY, Darlin'
(It's Only In-Your-Mind What's-Lurid!)

The Victorians were Hedonists
(Had LOTS of Prostitutes)
Straight-Laced on The OUTSIDE
Yet, VUGAR-to-Their-ROOTS!

& When They Shed Their Corsets
They Really Got-It-ON:
Population BOOMED When They
Invented BOX SPRINGS..Extra-Strong

(CHORUS)
So Darlin' DO SOME DON'TS
Your Life Will Soar
EVERY Generation Suppresses The NEXT
(UNTIL They CAN'T No-More)
Yeah..DO SOME DON'TS
It's How-You'll-Grow
How You'll Find What-You-Really-NEED
At The Center of Your Soul

(SOLO TIME)

We're Only Here a Little While
I'll Soon be Movin' On
But You'll Remember This Evenin'
Long After I'm Gone

We Laughed, Drank, Shared Some Jokes
Talked About The News
Then I Took Off ALL Your Clothes
& Made Sweet Love to You

(CHORUS)
Let's DO SOME DON'TS
Explore Yourself
Life, Liberty, Pursuit of Happiness
All Adds-Up to Health
So DO SOME DON'TS
You Just Live Once
Sacrifice a FEW Hangups
I Assure You'll Have Some FUN...

(TAG)
Honey, No One's PURE Who's Havin' FUN!

(C) 2011 by Stan God, BMI
All Rights Reserved

Hi Stan,

This is yours, so well written and outrageous goes without saying (LOL!)! But, that aside, there is one thing that keeps nagging at me here...I kept trying to put my finger on it and think I have...

Do you think that this entwines the daddy spankings too much with her sexuality? It just leaves lots of lingering thoughts...like was she spanked when she was three years old for trying to have too much fun running out in the street, or was he spanking her when she was older, for boy-related things? I don't know...just thinking...

Lisa

G'Mornin' Sweet LadyChum!

I assumed the Gal Listeners'd fill in the Blanks on What Daddy Spanked-'em-FOR when that line came up...but the Operative-Qualifier in-there is "To Slow Her Down"..& it seemed obvious it wasn't For Dad's Enjoyment, (or Hers, either) I'm a-hopin'....

Sadly-enough, yep, some folks associate Pain with Pleasure, later in life.

But...that sure isn't What's-Intended here...tho, I guess Anyone CAN fill in the Blanks..based on what floats their boats..heh!

Many Thanks for Your Kind, Brave Visite, Mz Sweets!
Best Weekend Wishes & a Big Hug & FHS,
Stan

Hi Stan
We had a sadistic headteacher who spanked us with a flat bat which he refered to as "the Whacker" we had our doubts about him even at the tender and prepubescent age of 10.Sorry I don't know why I shared that with you. Blame Lisa.LOL
Excellent write outrageous and funny. I'm off for a cold shower now .
Regards
Travis

Very cool Stan! Usually, titles that are clever are also too corny for me,,,but this one just hit me on some cool level tat is hard to explain. It's just cool! I think the D's,,,Love how they SOUND! That's why singers sing D Da Doo,,,,etc.

The lyrics also hit me in a cool way. I have NO issue with the first verse as to the rest of the song. For me, it set up the fact that someone had been held back,,,)for any reason). the reason is not important in songs,,,just the initial SOUND and FEEL of everything is. If wanting a full story, people can buy books for that! Like John Lennon would say when being asked about what a particular song actually meant, he more or less would say, whatever you want it to mean,,,,for YOU!...It was just a fun lyric that sounded good at the time, he would go on to say.

Lines come to writers with several possibilities for meanings in them, as you of course know more than I. To have to spell out everything would have us be novel writers,,,not 3 minute songwriters just wanting to get a few hooks to grab people! The heck with more details! I say that should be left for the ones that need to "think" about a song in that depth, to think as they must and come up possibilities not even thought about by the writer maybe!. For me,,,,I just want to enjoy the damn things!

Works for me! Would love to hear this in a song!
Besides,,,,like the saying goes,,,"don't bore us, get to the chorus"! I just want to get to the title HOOK! Very Cool! How ya get there? I don't care all that much, as long as "it relates somehow"?!

I love those lyrics! Scolded,,,spanking?,,,,,brings up some memories of the mid 50's! Fine with me. At least it wasn't "beating", "raping"!

Hey Stan,
Love the hook! Suggestions/comments below, as always, keep or sweep P.S. "Daddy Won't Always Be There" is in the oven, should be ready sometime tomorrow!

But I Can See There In Your Eyes

(CHORUS)
Hey, DO SOME DON'TS
Enjoy The World!
Do whatever you want
Long as no one gets hurt
Baby DO SOME DON'TS
You'll SOON Get Cured
CURIOSITY'S HEALTHY, Darlin'
(It's Only In-Your-Mind What's-Lurid!)<--not conversational

I agree with everything Johnny said here, with a bit of a caveat. Even with lines that are meant to be open to interpretation, the songwriter does have some original intent of where he wants the listener's mind to be led, even if he doesn't accomplish it and each mind ends up wandering off down its own path. And I was just, in not so clear a manner I can see because my own thinking is a bit murky in general, questioning whether these lines led to the place in the mind where they were originally intended to lead! Personally, I could relate to the mother's scolding, but not to the father's spanking, so I guess that goes back to Johnny's point...and we've come full circle! LOL! Lisa

HiDee Brother Trav!

Yeah, most all of us grew up in that Spare The Rod, Spoil The
Child world...& the Abusers were Everywhere. We had a HS Gym teacher who whacked any Late-comer to class...tho for some reason I was always on-time to THAT class...

I think a lot of Repression when you're younger takes Decades to undo...(But undoing it can be fun...) ;-)>

Many Thanks for Your Kind Visit & Words, Amigo! Glad ya survived him!

Best Wishes & a Big Guy-Hug,
Stan

HiYa Brother Johnny! I got this from a 2010 Canadian ELLE Magazine Issue that La Femme was reading & had left at the breakfast table...there was a perfume ad titled "Do The Don'ts" that caught my eye as I thumbed through it seeing what Last Year's Babes were wearin'...heh!

And, all last week I was in a Randier-than-usual-Mood..&..there before me was some Colorful Pulchritude & a Great Hook!

I'm a BIG John Lennon Fan...(NOBODY's EVER Topped "IMAGINE" as a 60's-&-Beyond Policy Statement, IMHO) He remains My Favorite Beatle...& yeah, I want folks to enjoy the song..in their own context... Good Entertainment should always be Fun..(& a wee-bit Subversive)...heh!

I'd be honored if you wanted to sing/co- this one, Amigo...so do let me know.

Many Thanks for Your VERY Kind Visit & Words! Best Weekend Wishes & a Big Guy-Hug,
Stan

HIDEE Meister-Migo...It's late in the evening...Gotta Tuck Somebody In...& hopefully I Shall Return...

THANKEE!
Stan

Stan
Long time no hear.. LOL very busy me with my medical practice and some music production thats include my sanitary napkin business.. Sorry for not commeting here but I have to request a big favor form you. WE have this local contest here and the pot price is around 2k dollars we have a song before entitled Life goes On I tweaked a lyrics and if you have time please tweaked it more if you find anything wrong with the context and syntax.. Heres the lyrics.


Life Goes On (Make It Different)
Words/ and Music by: Stan Good BMI/Lynman Bacolor
Guitar tracks : Anthony Antiporda Perez
Produced/Arranged by: Lynman Bacolor
Performed by: Loved By Pilar
I
Life goes on they keep on moving
Race to the top your dream is a real thing
You've got to ride life fueled by your goals
Well-oiled by passion, and greater speed as your motivating souls
II
Life goes on they keep on changing
Pave your new track, use your positive thinking
Learn from mistakes, improve that's the rule
You are empowered with greater mobility that is your tool

Chorus 1
You've got to live life to the max
Think outside the box
Make it different make it fun yeah
And when you’ve reached the end
Celebrate success with your friends
And enjoy your touring under the sun yeah

III
Life goes on they keep on pushing
Blaze all the road, you're a leader in the making
Good is not enough, give them all your best
You must go beyond your greater potential will solve all the rest

Chorus 2
You've got to live life to the max
Never to look back
Make it different make it fun yeah
And when you’ve reached the end
Celebrate success with your friends
And enjoy your touring under the sun yeah

Chorus 3
You've got to live life to the max
Don't settle with all the facts
Make it different make it fun yeah
And when you’ve reached the end
Celebrate success with your friends
(FADE)

HERes the you tube links you can listen to it im the singer at the moment

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fwZrnpmwWXM

heres the website of the motrocycle brand

http://www.yamaha-motor.com.ph/

Deadline is on october 30 and I hope this baby of ours will have the edge.

Lynman

hey Stan,we all know dad did the spankin' for no matter what reason and those spankin's were def not sexual AT ALL.More like an asswhoopin'!I believe in doin' the dont's to a certain extent and if ya enjoy it,hell,do 'em twice!Ya mighta coulda went with more descriptions other than sex on this one too.Fun one,Mojo

Hi Stan
Sounds full of fun.
Rhyming "cured" and "lurid" made me smile though. Sounds a little forced to me.
Maybe "find what you have in store" or "go and get some more"
or "go and take the grand tour".

Best wishes, Vic

HiDee Doc-Migo, Great to Hear from You Again!

For Starters, I'd sug THINGS in place of They..in "..They keep on moving"--

I'm too-tired tonight to do a deep review/rewrite on this one I'm Honored with your co-write on..but I'll be back tomorrow AM to do a complete job on it, OK?

Many Thanks Again & Best Wishes, Big Guy-Hug too,
Stan

HiDee CycleGuy,& Thanks for Motorin'-In, Amigo!

I guess I coulda detailed all-sorts of Shenanigans in-here, but I continue to think Each Listener can fill in whatever he/she wants in all the Gray Areas & Blank Spaces...

Me, I'd wanna throw Custard Pies in Political Faces...but it'd clutter-up the Sex Issue I WAS havin' fun-with..in this'n....

SO..guess later this week, I WILL pen that Custard Pie Number..(It DOES Yearn to be Addressed, don't it..heh-heh!)

Big Thanks for Your Kind Visit & Words, Amigo! (& NeighborGuy Mark Kaufman beat us all to that I'd Do It Twice" Hook...Beautifully Too!) (It's at the MP3 Board)

Best Wishes & a Big High-Five,
Stan

HiDee Brother Vic!

Yeah, I wasn't REALLY thrilled by both The Word..or The Rhyme, &
AM guilty as-charged.

I appreciate Your Kind Sugs, Amigo...& will wrack my brain a wee-bit harder to come up with a satisfactory stand-in!

Many Thanks!!!

Best Wishes & a Big Guy-Hug,
Stan

Hi Again, Doc-Migo...

Here's my hasty Re-Write...I'm next Off to Give-A-Listen! Thanks & Best Wishes, Stan

Life goes on, HEY, Keep on moving
Race to the top, MAKE your dream a real thing
You got to ride life fuelled by your goals
Well-oiled by passion, gaining speed motivatING YOUR soul

Life goes on, HEY,keep on charging
Pave your new ROADS WITH your positive thinking
Learn from mistakes..Improve..That's the rule
EmpowER YourSELF with VERSATILITY, IT'S A GREAT TOOL! (OK, "MOBILITY" Works WELL..for a Cycle Co. Contest..so go with Mobility for The Entry!)

(CH 1, Last Line:)
And GO-OUT touring..under the Sun..yeah!

V3:
Life goes on, HEY, keep on pushing
Blaze every PATH, you're a leader-in-TRAINING
Good'S not-enough, give IT all-your-Best
& STRETCHING your potential will PASS EVERY TEST

(C) 2011 by Good/Bacalor, BMI

Good Luck with this'n', Doc & Co.!

Best Wishes & a Big Guy-Hug,
Stan

PS: Music & Production are hittin' on All Cylinders, Congrats!)

STAN THE MAN--

TODAY'S GENERATION IS FAR REMOVED FROM OURS--WELL IT'S GOOD TO BREAK AWAY FROM NORMS ONCE IN A WHILE, BUT OLD SCHOOL VALUES HAD THEIR PLACE--SOMETIMES WITHOUT UNDERSTANDING WHY--

I HAVE TROUBLE WRITING THIS TYPE OF SONG--CAUSE I GOT SO MANY ABUSIVE WHIPPINGS IN THE ORPHANAGE--I DID A LOT OF DON'TS, I GUESS TOO MANY!

WRITE ON--A GOOD ONE TO PONDER BETWEEEN THE LINES!

Mackie

Stan.
Thanks a lot with your new suggestion..
I will get back once we through with the final recording of this song..
heres the final revision based on your suggestion... thanks thanks..

Life Goes On (Make It Different)
Words/ and Music by: Stan Good BMI/Lynman Bacolor
Guitar tracks : Anthony Antiporda Perez
Produced/Arranged/Performed by: Loved By Pilar
I
Life goes on, Hey, keep on moving
Race to the top make your dream a real thing
You've got to ride life fueled by your goals
Well-oiled by passion, and greater speed as your motivating souls
II
Life goes on, hey, keep on changing
Pave your new roads, with your positive thinking
Learn from your mistakes.. Improve.. That's the rule
You are empowered with greater mobility it’s your great tool!

Chorus 1
You've got to live life to the max
Think outside the box
Make it different make it fun yeah
And when you’ve reached the end
Celebrate success with your friends
And go out touring under the sun yeah

III
Life goes on, hey, keep on pushing
Blaze every path, you're a leader-in-training
Good is not enough, give it all your best
You must go beyond your greater potential will pass every test

Chorus 2
You've got to live life to the max
Innovate don’t stop
Make it different make it fun yeah
And when you’ve reached the end
Celebrate success with your friends
And go out touring under the sun yeah

Chorus 3
You've got to live life to the max
Never to look back
Make it different make it fun yeah
And when you’ve reached the end
Celebrate success with your friends
(FADE)


Lynman

Good Evening T-Bro!

I didn't really have any Wild-&-Crazy Guy-dom until I went to College...where I was somewhat out-of-place among all the Rich Kids there. (Rob Walton & Tim Smucker were Frat Bros. just down the hall, my Junior Year.)

But, during those 4 years, I watched kids who did Know How to Party..Chase Multiple-Babes..AND have a Damn Good Time. (AS-Well- As DO the Homework Assignments...we were ALL well-aware that if ya messed-up, you were 'Nam Fodder.)

MOST of them got in the National Guard, or got deferred to go to Grad School...me, right off to The Army..'Nam..then 5 yrs in Europe, after I learned to "Use-the-System." (& I learned We Americans are thought-of as Too-Work/Money-Oriented to have much FUN.")

A LOT of Europe's rubbed-off on me. &..heh..I still make it a point of having all SORTS of Fun, even as old as I know I'm a-getting...PARTLY because there's NO Sense in dying someday without a Smile on Your Face...& Somebody Sweet who'll Miss Ya!

I'm prolly Happier today than All my Wealthier Friends....

Thanks for Your Kind Visit & Words, Amigo...Best Wishes & a Big Go-Out-&-Have-Some-Fun Guy-Hug,
Stan

HiDee Again, Doc!

Hmm..try "You're empowered with great mobility, your ultimate tool"..& hopefully the folks at Yamaha'll eat it up!

Looks pretty good-to-go..lemmie peek at it a wee-bit-more!

Thanks Again...Best Wishes & Good Luck! Big Guy-Hug,
Stan

PS: "You must go beyond your great potential TO pass every test"
and "Well-oiled by passion, gaining speed as you're motivating souls"

Stan

This is another revision based on your sugs.


Life Goes On (Make It Different)
Words/ and Music by: Stan Good BMI/Lynman Bacolor
Guitar tracks : Anthony Antiporda Perez
Produced/Arranged/Performed by: Loved By Pilar
I
Life goes on, Hey, keep on moving
Race to the top make your dream a real thing
You've got to ride life fueled by your goals
Well-oiled by passion, and gaining speed as your motivating souls
II
Life goes on, hey, keep on changing
Pave your new roads, with your positive thinking
Learn from your mistakes.. Improve.. That's the rule
You are empowered with great mobility your ultimate tool!

Chorus 1
You've got to live life to the max
Think outside the box
Make it different make it fun yeah
And when you’ve reached the end
Celebrate success with your friends
And go out touring under the sun yeah

III
Life goes on, hey, keep on pushing
Blaze every path, you're a leader-in-training
Good is not enough, give it all your best
You must go beyond your great potential to pass every test

Chorus 2
You've got to live life to the max
Innovate don’t stop
Make it different make it fun yeah
And when you’ve reached the end
Celebrate success with your friends
And go out touring under the sun yeah

Chorus 3
You've got to live life to the max
Never to look back
Make it different make it fun yeah
And when you’ve reached the end
Celebrate success with your friends
(FADE)

Looks Good-to-go, Doc, except that one really HEFTY Line that could use a bitta-trimming:

"Well-Oiled by passion" [So- far, so good}...
"and" (Filler, whack it!)...
"Gaining Speed" {Keep It}...
"As you're" (Drop the 're)
"Motivating" (Drop the 'ing)
"Souls" (Keep it)

Ya then end up with
"Well-oiled with passion, Gaining Speed as you motivate souls" which says the same thing/is lots easier to sing.

MIGHT Try:..YOU gain speed as you motivate souls" Think it's even-better! KOD, &again, Good Luck Amigo!

Best Wishes& a Big Guy-Hug,
Stan

Stan Here is the final product for the yamaha songwriting contest..

Check out the link.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JeP2LJ0hHk

I followed the last suggestion but we decided to change the last line of the 3rd verse TO to Will because when we deliver the line it lost sense when we listened to it. Here we prioritize how it sound...

Big Thanks!!! Hope we nail this one...
Lynman

HiDee Doc-Migo!

That Motivate" Line is still a pretty big Mouthful...heh!

Great Job by the Guys..& Yourself! I'd pull that Bass UP in your final mix..it'll kick a bit more Butt, methinks!

Hats-Off to whomever put your Video together, too! It's a Winner in My Book..(just don't tell 'em I got a Kawasaki...heh-heh!)

"KUDOS" Amigo..may wanna post it at the MP3 board here for further Crits-- Nicely-Done...hope Yamaha Appreciates It!

Best Wishes & a Big Guy-Hug, to all-concerned!!!
Stan