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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 100
Serious Contributor
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OP
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 100 |
Verse 1
We had the world in our hands, I had planned a happy end, How we become so evil, I cant seem to understand.
Verse 2 Now I see we are long time separate, Heavy rain is falling,clouds are gray, You stay on your side of the bed, ready to leave any day.
Chorus So pack your bags,just go away, Cause we are playing wicked games, you should be already gone I guess we hurt each other in this mess. I am about to lose my mind, so I have to let you go, for too long I ve been blind, i need to start living my own life,my life,my life
Verse 3
There is a hate echous in our words, Screams are heard deep into the night, You are threating then apologize I don’t know why I am not surprised.
Verse 4 You don’t cease with the insults so maybe I am a lunatic, i dont like the game but I like the results, and I am leaving this battlefield.
Chorus So pack your bags,just go away, Cause we are playing wicked games, you should be already gone I guess we hurt each other in this mess. I am about to lose my mind, so I have to let you go, for too long I ve been blind, i have to start living my own life,my life,my life.
Bridge And the lies big as mountains Making us say one last goodbye, let the angels keep you safe, Even though you make me cry.
Chorus So pack your bags,just go away, Cause we are playing wicked games, you should be already gone I guess we hurt each other in this mess.
I am about to lose my mind, so I have to let you go, for too long I ve been blind, i got to keep living my own life,my life,my life
Last edited by Goran Pesic; 06/23/11 09:48 PM.
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 6,578
Top 30 Poster
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Top 30 Poster
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 6,578 |
Hi Goran, Probably some second language difficulty. A pretty good story--you might need to clue them in a little about what the wicked games are though. Wicked games would probably make a more intruiging title if we knew a little more about them. I'll go through part of it kinda' like I would see it. I didn't do anything abut the wicked games though cause I'm not sure where you'd want to go with it
Verse 1
We had the world in our hands, I HAD PLANNED a happy end How we become so evil, I X cant seem to understand.
Verse 2 WE'LL BE A LONG TIME APART Rain is falling,clouds are gray, You STAY On your side of the bed, Ready to LEAVE ANY DAY (TOO MANY "AWAYS" )
Chorus So pack your bags,just go away, Cause we are playing wicked games, YOU SHOULD BE ALREADY GONE I GUESS We hurt each other in this mess.
I am about to LOSE my mind, So I HAVE to let you go, for too long I've been blind, I NEED to START? living my OWN life
NOT SURE IF THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY IN THE LAST C LINE
That's just the way I would see it. There are other ways KOS Wy
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 100
Serious Contributor
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OP
Serious Contributor
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 100 |
Great critique Wyman...one more question.Do you think the lyric is finished?I tried to write this one for a female singer..is this song enough how should I say >girlish>?
Last edited by Goran Pesic; 06/23/11 08:09 PM.
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 100
Serious Contributor
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OP
Serious Contributor
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 100 |
I feel like the part with the wicked games theme would sound more interesting...and the story line would be much powerful...I ll be working on lyric tomorrow.
Last edited by Goran Pesic; 06/23/11 08:14 PM.
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