JPF Home Page Forums Lyric and MP3 Feedback Lyric Feedback Forum Luke Got His Head Stuck In A Cow...

Well, breakfast that day started out like always,
Luke and me ate fast, poured the coffee down,
We was just the hired hands down at Murray's,
Workin' on the farm, livin' in town.

Mrs. M, she's always big on breakfast,
Starts our day with biscuits and gravy,
We ask her for thirds and she lets us,
Says we need our strength and energy.

Now the breakfast stallin's over,
Mr. M says, "Boys, let's go."
Whistles for his big dog "Rover",
Jumps in his truck, puts it in low.

When we got to the north twenty,
Found a fence down, needin' fixed,
Boss left supplies and tools a'plenty,
Went for coffee with farmer Rick.

Bossy comes up for a scratch on the ears,
Friendliest cow on the farm,
Luke don't like her much, she peed and he was near,
He got pretty wet, but she meant him no harm.

My bovine buddy got her itches scratched,
Then I got right to work,
Luke was kinda lazy from breakfast,
So I fixed fence without the jerk.

Him and Bossy found a shady tree,
Luke settled in under it,
But Bossy gave him an unwelcome surprise,
Lifted her tail, and [naughty word removed]!

Now, to Lukes' credit, it splattered him, some,
But I wasen't expectin' the next thing he done.
He ripped a big switch right offa' that tree,
And started whalin' away at my friend, Bossy!

But what he didnt see, and I saw too late,
Was Bruno the bull, with a disapproving eye.
He seen Luke smackin' and whackin' his date,
And run up behind him, gonna teach him how to fly...

Luke wasen't expectin' a from behind attack,
Bossy wasen't either, I'm sure.
Bruno didn't care as he hit 'im in the back,
Shootin' Luke forward, towards a face full of manure.

First time I ever heard a cow scream,
Luke's scream was muffled in beef,
Bruno shakes his head, like he's wakin' from a dream,
A push and a kick, and Bossy starts to leave.

Now, this ain't exageration, and damn sure ain't no lie,
For twenty seconds his whole head dissappeared.
You might think that's impossible, even if you tried,
But a hundred mile an hour kiss can really stretch and tear.

Well, when my laughter subsided,
And I quit rollin' on the ground,
Luke dried out his eyes,
And he never made a sound.

Helped me fix the fence, never said a word,
Lookin' like he'd just seen a ghost.
I had to speak up, to make myself heard,
Still he wouldn't even laugh at my jokes.

He never did look me in the eye,
we got the job done quick,
Just as the boss was drivin' by.

Ridin' back for lunch,
Mr M. said, "What's that smell?"
Luke wouldn't say a bunch,
And it wasen't my place to tell.

Luke wasen't hungry, only worked half the day,
Almost a week 'fore I seen him.
Needin' some gros'rees I'd gotten my pay-
He was workin' at a seven-eleven!

Yeah, Luke got his head stuck inside of a cow,
Never even knew what hit 'im,
I seen it all, but who'd believe it anyhow?
Mr M. never knew why Luke quit him.

Bossy didn't like it,
But it didn't last too long,
A push and a kick,
And Luke was long gone.

I don't even know what to say...............

L

HiDee Brother Roy...

Waal..I've heard of guys losing their head OVER a Gal...

But this was a Whole New Dimension.

Good Luck with a weird one, Amigo!

Best Wishes & a Big Guy-Hug,
Stan

VERY lengthy, but I couldn't stop reading, ha ha
although I did want to trim a word ot two.

Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

Ummmm.....

Must be a true story - nobody could make that up. A well told tale but a very long song. Needs a good ole country boy to bring it to life.

wasent sure what kind of reaction this might get, but, i had fun puttin it together....
lifes too short to take it serious all the time....
peace.
roy

Hey Roy...

Had to look...lol.
It could use some trimmin but was still a fun read.
I got my arm stuck in a cow once...I was pullin a calf.

Larry

hi in2, thanks for givin it a read. its probly too long to be a song, but when i got the idea, i wasent sure where it would be goin, just wanted to do something to make people laugh. lifes too short to take it too serious.....
thanks for readin,
peace.
roy

Well, at least that should stop him licking his lips!

This was a fun read but I felt the meter needed a lot of tightening. Also there was confusion for me early on with Boss (a person) and Bossy (a cow). Maybe too many places and characters mentioned (many seem to be purely for rhyming as opposed to story) e.g. Murray's, Rick's, Mrs M, Rover

Enjoyed

Funny and in its own way happy and bright. Perfect respite in these times of malaise.

Peace,
Brian

thanks for the read, beechnut, glad you enjoyed it!
peace.
roy