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Mutlu
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/15/24 07:08 PM
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 54
Serious Contributor
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OP
Serious Contributor
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 54 |
Hi all.... This is a demo of a song that was written by Dottie. I only have a very basic set up at home and it shows! Im no singer and I'm still learning how to record so this is another step on a long road. All comments welcome  http://talentscorner.net/audio/160/daddys-cryingLyrics by Dottie Corley Music and vocals by Gary Parr She's bought a dress, new pair of shoes Daddy knows what he's supposed to do She made a list of who gets what but Mama, doesn't have a lot. Mama's sick, Daddys crying In his heart, he knows she's dying There is nothing, he can do I know, oh I know its true CHORUS Ask.....heaven to wait Mama, please dont go away today I know you're tired and your work is done But Daddys crying, we can't come Im begging you to stay Im begging you to stay Im begging you to stay Im begging you to stay She chose Papas church, to buy her plot thats where she goes, she doesnt go a lot Her friend Jean, will fix her hair And I know what, she wants to wear. Sister Sarah, can't stop crying Hold me Daddy, I know you're trying There is nothing, left to do I wish, oh I wish it wasn't true CHORUS Ask.....heaven to wait Mama, please dont go away today I know you're tired and your work is done But Daddys crying, we can't come Im begging you to stay Im begging you to stay Im begging you to stay Im begging you to stay BRIDGE Daddy knows it wont be long Mama wont be going home, Mama's sick and Daddys crying Deep inside I know he's dying... CHORUS Ask.....heaven to wait Mama, please dont go away today I know you're tired and your work is done But Daddys crying, we can't come Im begging you to stay Im begging you to stay Im begging you to stay Im begging you to stay
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 10,941 Likes: 3
Top 10 Poster
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Top 10 Poster
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 10,941 Likes: 3 |
I only have a very basic set up at home and it shows! I don't know know, it sounds like a pretty well done, full demo for a home setup. Sounds good to me. The topic is a trifle morbid for me, but it seems well put together. From a tech standpoint, I would cut that first 5 or 6 seconds out of the recording. It is just a background hiss and a click. Again, welcome to the JPF. Kevin Edit: Is it really about 7 minutes long? Yowzer, cut about 3 minutes out of that.
Last edited by Kevin Emmrich; 11/03/10 09:01 AM.
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 54
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OP
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Thanks kevin,
I'm on a tight budget at the moment so I'm doing all my editing/mixing on Audacity.
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Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 8,683
Top 20 Poster
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Top 20 Poster
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Dottie and Gary..
I can see what you're doing and I love it...very happy you came to JPF's...thanks for sharing this with us....way to go ...again welcome...
glyn
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 10,941 Likes: 3
Top 10 Poster
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Top 10 Poster
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 10,941 Likes: 3 |
Thanks kevin,
I'm on a tight budget at the moment so I'm doing all my editing/mixing on Audacity. When I want to cut out the count in or beginning hiss on a recording, I actually use audacity to do that. Kevin
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Joined: May 2010
Posts: 4,171 Likes: 8
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Top 100 Poster
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 4,171 Likes: 8 |
Dottie and Gary,
I KNOW THIS LYRIC DOTTIE!! A good one, but very sad.
It is long, I would definetly cut out the second sing of the bridge. I think adjusting the melody on the second and forth verses by kicking it up a bit would keep the flow going and add interest.
I thought your vocal was very nice and really liked the chorus and melody.
Tammy
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Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 3,427
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Top 100 Poster
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Hi Gary, It's about time you came to the BEST SONGWRITING BOARD I KNOW OF!! Thank you Gary, my mother just got out of the hospital again...She's in very bad shape and as you know my father just had a kidney removed that had cancer in it. It's very sad to see the strongest people in your life so week and fragile. I thank you again for doing this for me. PS Now go post, Oh Jeez!! The original!! lol Dottie
Last edited by Dottie; 11/03/10 01:05 PM.
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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 691
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Gary: You sing well. Have to say I found the song a bit depressing, though. Ott
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 54
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OP
Serious Contributor
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 54 |
Thanks everyone..
Ott....at least you found something though!!! it's always better than nothing!!
Gary
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 79
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Thanks kevin,
I'm on a tight budget at the moment so I'm doing all my editing/mixing on Audacity. When I want to cut out the count in or beginning hiss on a recording, I actually use audacity to do that. Kevin Same here - all my songs have a count-in, and I use Audacity to chop that out, on every one of my songs. It takes 2 seconds: Select > Delete > Save > Ta-Da!! -Mike
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