JPF Home Page Forums Lyric and MP3 Feedback MP3 Feedback Forum Cry Like My Baby

http://www.kendamkier.com/clmb.mp3

This one is about my girlfriends sister who died from too much alcohol 4 years ago.
It's posted to a listing on Taxi.
Therefore I would appreciate any input from you plain folks, so I can improve the track before it is taken into consideration.
...................................................

Cry Like My Baby

She's been drunk and she's been bad
now she lost the man she had
She's so wrapped up in a lie
she could lay right down and die
all her memories are sad
and the rest just makes her mad

uhhh cry like my baby...
uhhh cry like my baby...

And she's trying to count black sheep's
in her bed before she sleeps
but she wakes up with the sight
of a new gray day to fight
Empty bottles on the floor
makes her stumble out the door
down the tiny liquor-store
she just need to drink some more

I can see her in the dark
on the green bench in the park
watching couples passing by
under black clouds in the sky

uhhh cry like my baby...
uhhh cry like my baby...

Ken I can`t get the link" to work..would have liked to hear this song. Lane

Oh man... I don't understand.

When I click on the link it is working?

Don't know what to do?

tried again, still not opening..maybe get it on sound-click, and a link to it there too.. folks are going to want to hear this.

Ken , it would be nice to know what they are asking for in the listing .
The link worked for me.
All the best
Jan

Hi Ken,

I really love the sound of this tune, the chord progression as well as the melody. The smooth sound of your voice fits perfectly. But I gotta admit that I couldn't hear this song very often, because of the very depressing lyrics... Anyway: Great job!

Jimmy

Ken, I know that - while your command of it is extremely good - English isn't your native language. Hence, I have a couple of suggestions with regard to the lyrics.

Keep-or-sweep.

Donna

Cry Like My Baby

She's been drunk and she's been bad
now she's lost the man she had
She's so wrapped up in a lie
she could lay right down and die
all her memories are sad
and the rest just makes her mad

uhhh cry like my baby...
uhhh cry like my baby...

And she's trying to count black sheep's This should be "sheep". The singular is used even when the meaning is plural.
in her bed before she sleeps It sounds as though you mean the sheep in her bed. It's obvious the character is in her bed, so no need to spell it out. Perhaps something like "late at night before she sleeps".
but she wakes up with to the sight
of a new gray day to fight
Empty bottles on the floor
makes make her stumble out the door
down to the tiny liquor store
she just needs to drink some more

I can see her in the dark
on the green bench in the park
watching couples passing by
under black clouds in the sky

uhhh cry like my baby...
uhhh cry like my baby...
[/quote]

Hi Ken,

Well Donna did all the precision commenting for me..

But I'd like to say I think this is one of the best I've heard from you, although I like everything you're doing.
This is sad but beautiful
And when the chorus starts....It's something I just have to hum along with.

REAL NICELY DONE.

Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

Thanks Jimmy(-:
I know it's a little depressing, but that's how it came out.

Hi Donna,
Thanks you so very much for taking your time.
I'll re-record the song according to your sugestions.
You are a sweetie!!!

Hi Calvin, Thanks man. I'm glad you liked it(-:

All the best
ken

Ken...great vocal...the guitar is so smooth...very sad song....being a personal type song, I can feel your emotion in the performance of this song...which makes it even better.....this is well done....enjoyed listening to this song....Bob

Hello Ken,

Donna has covered all that I would have mentioned as well...all the things that jumped out at me while reading the lyric were all about word usages and tenses...etc..like she said....it was an easy fix....so all I can say is that from the first notes I was drawn into this...the melody is perfect for these hauntingly beautiful lyrics that clearly express the sentiment of the singer toward a troubled friend. This is just a wonderful piece....depressing in a way, but yet uplifting to know that the singer has such heart....beautiful. I love your work.

Jan

well I guess its on my end Ken. I`ll try some different things to open this. sorry if I caused any problem for you. Lane

Very well done, great recording and performance. Mighty fine job on the harmonies, too. Your stuff is always a pleasure to listen to. Thanks for sharing.

As for Taxi, it all depends on the listing requirements, so it is hard to give any assistance there.

Kevin

Hi Ken,

Very heavy! Exquisitely painful. I really feel this one. My husband's brother drank himself to death too. So sad, but well done.

Ricki

Hi Ken


I like this one a LOT -- a very powerful listen as is - as you have the edits - I wish the best for placement.

Cheers
jm

Thanks Bob (Robert?)
I was in self pity-mode the late night I wrote and recorded this one, and I had a bottle too much too.

Janice,
That was some very comforting words from you - Thanks.
An easy fix... Ha ha ha - I've been working on singing the lyrics changed due to the corrections suggested, but I have some trouble putting the feeling into it, and I refuse to get drunk to get there again(-:

Hi Kevin,
I'm learning about Taxi, and I know it can be a long hard road to go, but I need to walk that road(-:
Thanks for your kind review.

Hi Ricki,
Thanks for sharing this with me.
Sorry about your husband's brother.
May he rest in peace.

Hi Joice... I'm working on it still.
Thanks for helping me out(-:

Thanks again all, I appreciate your thoughts and inputs!

Ken