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Joined: Aug 2008
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http://soundclick.com/share?songid=7858186Watchin' Little Joey Play Lyrics: Roy Harris Music and Vocal: James Ryce In a one bedroom apartment Where the walls don’t hold back sound Staring out the window At the rain falling down My mind keeps drifting back To a much brighter day When I was there with you Watchin’ little Joey play Chorus Sitting in the backyard watchin’ as he swings Push me higher daddy I can hear him sing Catch me if I fall are the words he used to say I’d give anything to be watchin’ little Joey play I went to the park today To help me pass the time The place we used to go When I was yours and you were mine When I pulled in I saw your car I had to turn away Cause I couldn’t bear to sit there Watchin’ little Joey play Sitting in the backyard watchin’ as he swings Push me higher daddy I can hear him sing Catch me if I fall are the words he used to say I’d give anything to be watchin’ little Joey play Bridge Now he’s singing in my memory I can’t catch him if he falls All I have now is a photograph Hanging on the wall Sitting in the backyard watchin’ as he swings Push me higher daddy I can hear him sing Catch me if I fall are the words he used to say I’d give anything to be watchin’ little Joey play ©2009 James Ryce/Roy Harris __________________
Last edited by Roy Harris; 07/21/09 08:50 AM.
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Joined: Dec 2006
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Hey Roy,
Really like the structure, concept and delivery, musically it's interesting and the overall sound is great.
I'm not so sure about the lyrics. A little abstract perhaps, and and as a story piece, it kind of lacks the capture and bite of the music. I find it hard to relate and follow the story line, and didn't feel there was the payoff for this type of genre. Maybe the subject matter ? Then again, country isn't my main focus. I'd keep working on it, and perhaps approach it from a different angle lyrcally. It's a well structured song.
cheers, niteshift
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 10,941 Likes: 3
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Well performed demo and the structure is well crafted. I was a little lost in the lyrics. Even if they are divorced, he would have visitation rights and he would get to be in little Joey's life. I think you need to rethink this one.
Kevin
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Joined: Apr 2009
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Hi Roy, I think that this is a very beautiful song but it did leave me with some question.I also was wondering why the singer didnt get to see Little Joey anymore?Did he not get visitation rights to his son?Was it even his son?(Perhaps it was the son of a former girlfriend and he became very fond of him and started calling him Dad)That would make the story make alot of sense,but we're left just not knowing.I guess that can work in alot of songs but in a song as beautiful and heartfelt as this one,I feel that listeners will want to know the answers.Very Nice song,Roy! Michelle
*****You know I'm a dreamer,but my heart's of gold*****Motley Crue
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Thanks for your comments, all of you. After posting this here and on another forum, we realize there is a flaw in the lyrics as Michelle pointed out. So, we are gonna redo the second verse and take the mom and boy out of the park and have them move so far away that he isn't able to visit with the boy and somehow make it all work with the existing music track. Thanks for your insight. And I'll let you in on a little secret. This is sort of based on a true life experience. You see, I am an old man, been married to this woman for fifteen years. We somehow ended up raising her little grandson from birth. Her daughter, my stepdaughter, had the boy and refused to take on a mother's role so my wife and I raised the little fella. He is four years old now and my best buddy. Well, long story short, we split and I'm living in an apartment in another town and I sure miss the little fella. Hell, nobody cares about an old man in a song, so I wrote this to try and make it a marketable song. Sometimes you just can't tell it like it is in a song. I knew what I wanted to say, but I didn't say it. lol.
Last edited by Roy Harris; 07/22/09 01:35 AM.
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Joined: Mar 2006
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Yes, I like this, a little twee for my tastes but very well produced work all the same.
Dude
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Roy, I really like the music and I think the story line can work. While you're redoing the 2nd vs you might want to make it more like the first verse in terms of syllables and line lengths. I don't tend to look technically at lyrics but the words should fit pretty much the same melody. For instance the fourth lines: "At the rain falling down" and "When I was yours and you were mine" just don't seem to sing the same. It's certainly worth working on so keep after it. Just pokin' my nose in. JW
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Hey Roy, i think you did just fine telling this story and making it better will only make it a great song..man, you had my heart on the floor, could feel your pain and enjoyed this song alot, but with Michelles' sugg. on why he couldn't see the boy and you now telling why, well what can I say...it will be a great song, heartfelt.....captured my heart strings for sure...best of luck with it and can't wait to hear it redone...glyn
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I think your story will work, just need to add something lyrically that says "He wasn't mine, but I treated him like he was".
Kevin
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