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#739644 07/21/09 08:48 AM
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http://soundclick.com/share?songid=7858186

Watchin' Little Joey Play
Lyrics: Roy Harris
Music and Vocal: James Ryce

In a one bedroom apartment
Where the walls don’t hold back sound
Staring out the window
At the rain falling down
My mind keeps drifting back
To a much brighter day
When I was there with you
Watchin’ little Joey play

Chorus
Sitting in the backyard watchin’ as he swings
Push me higher daddy I can hear him sing
Catch me if I fall are the words he used to say
I’d give anything to be watchin’ little Joey play

I went to the park today
To help me pass the time
The place we used to go
When I was yours and you were mine
When I pulled in I saw your car
I had to turn away
Cause I couldn’t bear to sit there
Watchin’ little Joey play

Sitting in the backyard watchin’ as he swings
Push me higher daddy I can hear him sing
Catch me if I fall are the words he used to say
I’d give anything to be watchin’ little Joey play

Bridge
Now he’s singing in my memory
I can’t catch him if he falls
All I have now is a photograph
Hanging on the wall

Sitting in the backyard watchin’ as he swings
Push me higher daddy I can hear him sing
Catch me if I fall are the words he used to say
I’d give anything to be watchin’ little Joey play

©2009 James Ryce/Roy Harris
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Last edited by Roy Harris; 07/21/09 08:50 AM.
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Hey Roy,

Really like the structure, concept and delivery, musically it's interesting and the overall sound is great.

I'm not so sure about the lyrics. A little abstract perhaps, and and as a story piece, it kind of lacks the capture and bite of the music. I find it hard to relate and follow the story line, and didn't feel there was the payoff for this type of genre. Maybe the subject matter ? Then again, country isn't my main focus. I'd keep working on it, and perhaps approach it from a different angle lyrcally. It's a well structured song.

cheers, niteshift




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Well performed demo and the structure is well crafted. I was a little lost in the lyrics. Even if they are divorced, he would have visitation rights and he would get to be in little Joey's life. I think you need to rethink this one.

Kevin


"Good science comes in peer reviewed journals. Conspiracy theories come in YouTube videos. "
Kevin @ bandcamp: Crows Say Vee-Eh (and Kevin @50/90 2019)
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Hi Roy,
I think that this is a very beautiful song but it did leave me with some question.I also was wondering why the singer didnt get to see Little Joey anymore?Did he not get visitation rights to his son?Was it even his son?(Perhaps it was the son of a former girlfriend and he became very fond of him and started calling him Dad)That would make the story make alot of sense,but we're left just not knowing.I guess that can work in alot of songs but in a song as beautiful and heartfelt as this one,I feel that listeners will want to know the answers.Very Nice song,Roy!
Michelle


*****You know I'm a dreamer,but my heart's of gold*****Motley Crue


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Thanks for your comments, all of you. After posting this here and on another forum, we realize there is a flaw in the lyrics as Michelle pointed out. So, we are gonna redo the second verse and take the mom and boy out of the park and have them move so far away that he isn't able to visit with the boy and somehow make it all work with the existing music track. Thanks for your insight. And I'll let you in on a little secret. This is sort of based on a true life experience. You see, I am an old man, been married to this woman for fifteen years. We somehow ended up raising her little grandson from birth. Her daughter, my stepdaughter, had the boy and refused to take on a mother's role so my wife and I raised the little fella. He is four years old now and my best buddy. Well, long story short, we split and I'm living in an apartment in another town and I sure miss the little fella. Hell, nobody cares about an old man in a song, so I wrote this to try and make it a marketable song. Sometimes you just can't tell it like it is in a song. I knew what I wanted to say, but I didn't say it. lol.

Last edited by Roy Harris; 07/22/09 01:35 AM.
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Yes, I like this, a little twee for my tastes but very well produced work all the same.

Dude

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Roy,
I really like the music and I think the story line can work. While you're redoing the 2nd vs you might want to make it more like the first verse in terms of syllables and line lengths. I don't tend to look technically at lyrics but the words should fit pretty much the same melody. For instance the fourth lines:
"At the rain falling down" and
"When I was yours and you were mine" just don't seem to sing the same.
It's certainly worth working on so keep after it.
Just pokin' my nose in.
JW


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Hey Roy, i think you did just fine telling this story and making it better will only make it a great song..man, you had my heart on the floor, could feel your pain and enjoyed this song alot, but with Michelles' sugg. on why he couldn't see the boy and you now telling why, well what can I say...it will be a great song, heartfelt.....captured my heart strings for sure...best of luck with it and can't wait to hear it redone...glyn

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I think your story will work, just need to add something lyrically that says "He wasn't mine, but I treated him like he was".

Kevin


"Good science comes in peer reviewed journals. Conspiracy theories come in YouTube videos. "
Kevin @ bandcamp: Crows Say Vee-Eh (and Kevin @50/90 2019)

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