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Mutlu
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/15/24 07:08 PM
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Leafs
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/05/24 01:49 PM
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Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 26
Casual Observer
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OP
Casual Observer
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 26 |
Hey people, I recorded a short track called "My Path". You can check it out below. ListenDownloadThe beat is from Terra Firma - Hall of Fame. Let me know your thoughts. Thanks
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,788
Top 40 Poster
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Top 40 Poster
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,788 |
Welcome Life Rise! Sorry but I am not the one to ask for critique here since I am not a fan of rap. Hope someone can help.
Best, Lynn
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Joined: Feb 2009
Posts: 66
Serious Contributor
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Serious Contributor
Joined: Feb 2009
Posts: 66 |
Hi Life Rise,
Welcome to JPF! Stick around, it's a fantastic place with lotsa really talented people.
It's really nice to meet someone into hip hop on here (more diversity the better!)
I like hip hop, but it's not my genre, so please take my stream of consciousness comments with a grain of salt.
Music: Just begging for a lift in the chorus with female vox. Appreciate the pause for effect in "in front of you".
Vox: Good delivery. Your voice would suit Ozzie Hip Hop (aka Pez, Coptic Soldier). Perhaps you could vary the rhythm (is it an iambic pentameter?) a little after a while. The best example I can think of is Eminem's Lose Yourself, last verse, where he cranks it UP (trying to feed and water my seed etc.)!
Lyrics: Pretty good. Alternative title might be "Follow my desires through".
Would love to hear more material. You are a pretty good MC!
Cheers and I hope you stick around, Rich.
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Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 26
Casual Observer
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OP
Casual Observer
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 26 |
Hey thanks for checking & giving feedback Rich, i hear what your saying. This is one of the most active forums i've seen, hard to find your post lol.
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Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 26
Casual Observer
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Casual Observer
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 26 |
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Joined: May 2008
Posts: 4,195 Likes: 1
Top 100 Poster
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Top 100 Poster
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 4,195 Likes: 1 |
Glad to have some rap here. I like the overall texture of the song. You have a good voice.
Tom
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Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 26
Casual Observer
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Casual Observer
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 26 |
Thanks for having a listen mate.
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,762 Likes: 23
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Top 50 Poster
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,762 Likes: 23 |
Hi Life Rise, It's a cool rap, upbeat message, syncopated enough that it stays interesting for me. I don't know much British rap (I'm guessing), but this sure beats the hell out of Chumbawumba Mike
Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice Fortune depends on the tone of your voice
-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon) from the song "Songs of Love" from the album "Casanova" (1996)
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Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 65
Serious Contributor
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Serious Contributor
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 65 |
The mix is good. The rapping is good. The drum beat is good. Maybe add some singing to the song, too.
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Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 26
Casual Observer
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OP
Casual Observer
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 26 |
ha thanks Michael i'm Australian actually but can sound british. Cheers for commenting IJenNeh.
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