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Joined: Aug 2007
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Alternative Rock….. Could be Male or Female
Don’t objectify me
Like polishing a primrose To show its true hue Judging screen plays by the cover Mostly way over due
Envisioning the twilight As the maker leaves his mark Careful walking on the shoreline Especially when it’s after dark
As poison fills the cup drink it down Said the joker to his kinsmen and the crown
Don’t objectify me I’m escaping from the box Just throw away the key Don’t you know that bs walks Don’t objectify me Or try to place a bid Can’t handle what you see Can you see where it’s hid? Can’t sell me for a fee I’m free Don’t objectify me
Beauty maybe skin deep Am I ugly to the core? Listen to the damned speak Until they even up the score
May your prejudice destroy you! As you try to pin me down While your hatred goes on right through And holds you to the ground
As the filament flashes into dying ember There’s something I want you to remember
Don’t objectify me I’m escaping from the box Just throw away the key Don’t you know that bs walks Don’t objectify me Or try to place a bid Can’t handle what you see Can you see where it’s hid? Can’t sell me for a fee I’m free Don’t objectify me
Repeat chorus to end
Copyright November 22, 2008 Derek Hines BMI All Rights Reserved
Last edited by Derek Hines; 11/22/08 05:42 PM.
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Joined: Nov 2007
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Hi Derek,
a very nice reading. Some phrases are almost Shakespearean, I must say. Or, at least, they reminded me of the mood and the musicality of some of his lines.
On the other hand, while I LOVE this sort of writing (my right brain is delighted), it's not always crystal-clear at first reading (my left brain is a bit puzzled). As you specify Alternative Rock, I suppose it's not as important a problem as it would be for the Country genre.
One line especially needs to be clarified for me, though: "Don’t you know that bs walks". Or is it a typo?
To sum up it all, I like what I hear and see (some powerful images), but I don't fully understand the relation between these images and your theme.
Hope some of this helps. Take care,
Yann.
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 5,210
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Alternative Rock….. Could be Male or Female
Don’t objectify me
Like polishing a primrose To show its true hue Judging screen plays by the cover*** Not real sure of meaning.. Mostly way over due
Envisioning the twilight As the maker leaves his mark Careful walking on the shoreline Especially when it’s after dark
As poison fills the cup drink it down Said the joker to his kinsmen and the crown
Don’t objectify me I’m escaping from the box Just throw away the key Don’t you know that bs walks Don’t objectify me Or try to place a bid Can’t handle what you see Can you see where it’s hid? Can’t sell me for a fee I’m free Don’t objectify me
Beauty maybe skin deep Am I ugly to the core? Listen to the damned speak Until they even up the score
May your prejudice destroy you! As you try to pin me down While your hatred goes on right through And holds you to the ground
As the filament flashes into dying ember There’s something I want you to remember
Don’t objectify me I’m escaping from the box Just throw away the key Don’t you know that bs walks Don’t objectify me Or try to place a bid Can’t handle what you see Can you see where it’s hid? Can’t sell me for a fee I’m free Don’t objectify me
Repeat chorus to end
Copyright November 22, 2008 Derek Hines BMI All Rights Reserved Except for the one line, I marked, I really think this is well-done. I could hear it alternative. Good job! kimberlyinNC
*Always open to collaborations on my lyrics.. with singers and musicians, but PLEASE contact me before putting work into one--in case someone else has it..thanks!!** BMI Member All Rights Reserved http://www.littleikepublishing.com Email for Song Business Only littleikeproductions@hotmail.com
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