7 members (Gary E. Andrews, Everett Adams, VNORTH2, couchgrouch, Fdemetrio, Perry Neal Crawford, Sunset Poet),
4,248
guests, and
261
robots. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
Welcome to the Just Plain Folks forums! You are currently viewing our forums as a Guest which gives you limited access to most of our discussions and to other features.
By joining our free community you will have access to post and respond to topics, communicate privately with our users (PM), respond to polls, upload content, and access many other features. Registration is fast, simple, and absolutely free; so please join our community today!
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449
Top 500 Poster
|
OP
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449 |
I'm a little afraid the title might put some people off - but I can't think what else to call it.
Bring A Leash ©2007 MIKE PARRISH
Verse 1 Since I couldn’t find a boyfriend I gave Match Mate Dot Com a try Didn’t like the macho photo’s And all the “I’m an awesome guy” Then I saw your simple picture You made it clear that you weren’t proud As I viewed your modest profile It got me laughing right out loud
Chorus – It Read “Bring a leash, and drag this dog out of here I don’t smoke, but sometimes I’ll have a beer I’m not dumb, but I’m not a college man Got a farm, where I’ve learned to work the land Hair is blonde, but it’s kind of mostly gone In my truck, it’s Country when the music’s on I’m not old, but I’m getting on in years Bring a leash, and drag this dog out of here”
Verse 2 So I sent my plain old profile And Said “ I think you are like me” In what seemed like only seconds You wrote me back that you agreed When I met you for our first date I pulled a leash out of my coat Said “ I’m gonna drag you out of here And hold you to these words you wrote”
Repeat chorus
Bridge And now I’m getting married to the most flawless man I know I don’t need a kennel club to tell me who’s the “Best In Show”
Repeat chorus
Tag Bring A Leash
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 4,192
Top 100 Poster
|
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 4,192 |
Hi Py,
You got me giggling here. And I think this is gonna be good. Although I did wonder about the "dragging" part. Can you make him a little more spunky? How about...
Pull this puppy outta here? Give him a young spirit so he'll really hook 'em.
Oh, and for the hair part---I like it that he's losing his hair. But this is what seemed to flow smoother to me
Hair is blonde, but it’s mostly kinda gone
Gotta go tend to something.
Good to 'see' you.
Vanessa
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 4,697
Top 50 Poster
|
Top 50 Poster
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 4,697 |
Py,
This is some awesome country writing....like it so much. The name of this one should be....OUT OF HERE for sure. If that one hit the airways...it would hit the charts and be OUT OF HERE.
Love it...Jan
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 3,027
Top 100 Poster
|
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 3,027 |
Py,
That's good! Great alternate angle lyric, and a killer of a bridge. Excellent work.
Keep writing.
Skip
P.S. Your hook/title is "Bring a Leash". That is both the repeated line at the beginning and end of your chorus, and also a vivid enough image that it will stick in the listener's mind. I think you're right going with that.
Last edited by Skip Johnson; 01/09/08 07:15 PM.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 33
Casual Observer
|
Casual Observer
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 33 |
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449
Top 500 Poster
|
OP
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449 |
Thanks Vanessa - I like your blonde hair change - I treid different ways to say that - but couldn't get it right.
Thanks Janice - Out of Here is good - I was afraid Bring a Leash might give the wrong idea.
Thanks skip - I stuggled with the bridge and thought this one up on the way to work today.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 4,192
Top 100 Poster
|
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 4,192 |
Oh, and Py, I should have also made sure to tell you that my giggling meant I REALLY liked this one. It's a charmer for sure.
Vanessa
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449
Top 500 Poster
|
OP
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449 |
Thanks for stopping by Kenny
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449
Top 500 Poster
|
OP
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449 |
Thanks Vanessa - always like to charm those Mississippi girls - seems like you are from there - if I haven't gotten you confused with someone else. Congrats on the National Championship - Alabama is coming back - with the help of your old coach.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 4,192
Top 100 Poster
|
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 4,192 |
Hey Py, I couldn't help messin' with this to see what it would sound like from the guy's POV. If it's from the guy's POV I think the "dragging" part works.
Bring A Leash ©2007 MIKE PARRISH
Verse 1 Since SHE DIDN'T HAVE a boyfriend SHE gave Match Mate Dot Com a try BUT SHE Didn’t like the macho photos And all the “I’m YOUR/OH SO awesome guyS” Then SHE saw MY simple picture Made it clear I weren’t TOO proud As SHE viewed MY modest profile It HAD HER laughing right out loud
Chorus – It Read “Bring a leash, and drag this dog ON out of here I don’t smoke, but sometimes I’ll have a beer I’m not dumb, but I’m not a college man Got a farm, where I’ve learned to work the land Hair is blonde, but it’s kind of mostly gone In my truck, it’s Country when the music’s on I’m not old, but I’m getting on in years Bring a leash, and drag this dog out of here”
Verse 2 So SHE sent HER SIMPLE profile Said “I think you'RE JUST FOR me” I DIDN'T WASTE a MIN---UTE Wrote RIGHT back that I agreed When SHE met ME for our first date SHE pulled a leash out of HER coat Said “ I’m gonna drag you out of here And hold you to these words you wrote”
Repeat chorus
Bridge SHE SAID, I’m IN LOVE WITH the most flawless man I know I don’t need a kennel club to tell me who’s the “Best In Show”
Repeat chorus
Tag Bring A Leash
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449
Top 500 Poster
|
OP
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449 |
Thanks Vanessa - I'll have to study this some. It's hard for me to hear a guy singing it - but changing it like this does open it up to be uni-sexed. There is something self serving if a guy sings it though.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 4,192
Top 100 Poster
|
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 4,192 |
Hi Py, Thanks for the kind words for LSU. That's my husbands stomping grounds over there. And I've just begun to start learning about football (for the sake of my family) so I think you're saying that Alabama has got a former coach of LSU? Or Mississipi State? Seems I do recall Steve mentioning that Alabama had one of LSU's former coaches. I guess LSU helps soften the blow left each year by the Saints. But it's dem Coyboys that I know more about than any of 'em. (course that ain't much <g>) Ok, back to the song. I figured you didn't want the singer to sound like he's bragging. And usually I detest any form of that but in this case, it works. The chorus is the longest part and is repeated a couple times at least. That's the part I don't hear a gal being able to pull off. I'd rather hear that part coming from the main character. She's the narrator still I think even if it's from the male POV. She still gets to put her slant to it so he's not bragging on himself. And if there is any doubt about that the chorus would certainly redeem that imo. It's your song though. Thanks for letting me practice some with POVs. It was fun. I'll post a song later about all the places I'm from. Gotta find it first. But, yes I was born in Mississippi and my roots are still there. But Texas got my heart and I don't know what Alabama has yet---but I've been here 20 years. Keep writing and posting, Vanessa
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449
Top 500 Poster
|
OP
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449 |
I think it can work - I'm up for it. After I write the lyrics I'm done though - I can't do music. I'm a Dallas Songwriter Association member - remote - GA/AL. Good luck to the Cowboys this weekend.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 1,441
Top 200 Poster
|
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 1,441 |
Howdy Mike! You made me laugh! A good one! Ok, off the topic... I once saw an add in the personals (back when there was a thing called a newspaper)that read something like: Vile, disgruntled ogre seeks ugly, toothless shrew for bitter daytime argumentsAlso made me laugh... Best o' luck with it! "Uncle" Chuck
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449
Top 500 Poster
|
OP
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449 |
Chuck thanks - that's funny because I got the idea from a classified add in the Tuscaloosa News back in the late seventies - it was for something like a 1967 cadillac - it said - power windows - don't work - power locks - don't work - Ac - doesn't work - bring a leash and drag this dog out of here. I hadn't thought of it in years until the other day and this idea popped in my head. The newspapar is a great source for ideas I think - even if there is a 30 year delay.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 4,400
Top 100 Poster
|
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 4,400 |
Hi Mike,
I think this is the first of yours I've commented on, I'm not sure. This is great. There ain't many men out there would admit their supposed failings like this. I can see how a woman would really go for the truth in it. This one deserves music and a decent demo. Good luck with it.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449
Top 500 Poster
|
OP
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449 |
Thanks John - I'd love for you to write the music. It's on a different the spectrium from Assisted Living Chior.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 4,400
Top 100 Poster
|
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 4,400 |
Hi Mike,
I'm terrible with names, I didn't even pick it up after I had written it. Let's see how the first one goes. And yes, a whole different kind of song, but both well written.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449
Top 500 Poster
|
OP
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 449 |
john that's ok i was prouder you like it and didn't realize it was me.
|
|
|
We would like to keep the membership in Just Plain Folks FREE! Your donation helps support the many programs we offer including Road Trips and the Music Awards.
|
|
Forums117
Topics125,718
Posts1,160,951
Members21,470
|
Most Online37,523 Jan 25th, 2020
|
|
"If one man can do it, any man can do it. It is true. But the real question is, if one man did it, are you willing to do what it takes to do it as well?" –Brian Austin Whitney
|
|
|
|