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Joined: Apr 2001
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Yee Haw! Utah! (c) 2002 dawg, BMI
Rooster rules the hen house. Bull controls the cows. Stallion keeps his mares in line. I'm backwoods Mormon proud.
Only got six wives so far none less than seventeen. They all get hot for what I got (if you know what I mean)
Yee Haw! Utah! We know our way is best. DA's confused 'bout what to do. He'd like me to confess. Don't know why folks get so riled over what happens to me Yee Haw! Utah!..and.... the State of Polygamy.
I picked the first one out myself then she chose all the rest. It helps if they're the same size makes 'em easier to dress.
Each has her own bedroom the night she sleeps with me. Rest of the time they sleep just fine in their dormitory.
Yee Haw! Utah! We know our way is best. DA's confused 'bout what to do. He'd like me to confess. Don't know why folks get so riled over what happens to me Yee Haw! Utah!.....and.... the State of Polygamy.
Each one has a job in town, but I don't, I confess. The good Lord knows I'm willing but man, I need some rest.
They've now picked my seventh; one each day of the week She works in a laundry. You should see her on the sheets.
Yee Haw! Utah! We know our way is best. DA's confused 'bout what to do. He'd like me to confess. Don't know why folks get so riled over what happens to me Yee Haw! Utah!...and... the State of Polygamy.
[This message has been edited by greydog (edited 05-28-2002).]
Wisdom does not always accompany age. Sometimes age just shows up alone.
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Ooooh you Daaaaaawwwwwwwwggggg!!!!!!! ain't gonna nit this, toooooo funny! But let me just say, DREAM ON!!!!!!! BOBBIE!!!! WARNING!!! WARNING!!! his true colors are sneaking out ------------------ Harriet
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Why Harriet,
I am shocked. How anyone could misconstrue a simple and poignant love balled into something salicious. Shame on you.
dawg
Thanks for the read and misunderstandin'<g>
Wisdom does not always accompany age. Sometimes age just shows up alone.
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Joined: Jan 2001
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ROTLMAO Dawggy! This is very funny! Loved it Pam ------------------ http://www.soundclick.com/pamhurley
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Joined: May 2001
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I hate it when I can't pick nits out of something Dawg. This gets pinned on the front door for when the Mormons call 'round next time. Not that I got anything against them . In fact i think they have given up trying to convert me but still call around when there ain't anything funny on TV or all the wives have a headache or are out on the day job. You are such a dag Dawg. Regards. Graham ------------------ http://artists3.iuma.com/IUMA/Bands/Graham_Henderson/
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Joined: Feb 2001
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This is bound to piss somebody off, but not me. Funny and ridiculous as usual, Dawg. Thanks for the laugh!
Corey
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This is bound to piss somebody off, but not me. Funny and ridiculous as usual, Dawg. Thanks for the laugh!
Corey
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Can't say I laughed at this one, but it's fairly well-written. The only weak part I can see is the bakery stanza. Also, since Utah is supposed to be four-square against polygamy nowadays, the chorus doesn't seem quite right. But it's just a silly lyric, so it doesn't matter. Nice job! Anthony
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 118
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Dawg, This is downright hilarious! I knew there was some reason why I steared clear of Utah all these years. Good job as ususal. ------------------ Melody
Melody
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Thank you all, good people...
been on the road for a few days and just got back in. Will try to catch up answering tonight and reading and commenting in the am.
Graham,
Thank you, even if I have no idea what a dag is???? Glad you enjoyed the lyric.
Corey.....
There is no affirmation like double affirmation! Dean Wormer and the Delta's would have loved it.
Anth,
Utah has never been against polygamy. Monogamy was forced on Utah as a condition for acceptance into statehood.
Melody,
I knew there was a reason for the old expression, "saving the best for last". Thank you for taking the time to read and comment.
dawg
Wisdom does not always accompany age. Sometimes age just shows up alone.
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The Mormon Church claims to be completely against polygamy nowadays (due only to the influence of modern society, I'm sure), but I hope you're right, cuz if you are, Utah is a more interesting state than I ever thought. Anthony
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No nits from me, Dawg! The singer must be something special to keep 7 women happy. PMS times 7. What man in his right mind would want that?
Cute read!
JeanB
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Gee Dawg, has Bobbie seen this? Some time ago I wrote "one of billy's girls", about a bar scene where someone's trying to pick up one of (mormon) Billy's wives, and your ms Bobbie set me straight on the great state of Utah. Just giving you fair warning Oh BTW, I like it.
If writing ever becomes work I think I'm going to have to stop
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Thanks ya'll,
sorry it took me so long to respond. Couldn't get on the board this mornin' for some reason.
Anth, thanks for the comeback.
Sis, glad you liked it.
Johnny V, she has set me straight on several subjects.<g>
dawg
Wisdom does not always accompany age. Sometimes age just shows up alone.
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Wow, Dawg, Anything I Say'll get Me in Great Trouble..but, Heh-heh, "KUDOS" for one I hope ya didn't have to Research Much...:-)>
Yee-Haw, Amigo! Big Guy-Hug, Stan
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G'day greydog. Gee Mate, you write great songs. I wouldn'ta missed this one for quids! Another great greydog song! best wishes, Ray in Australia.
Ray Thyer
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Dawg,
Hope this doesn't get you in the "Dawg House"! Sure put me in the Funny House! You are an awesome writer. Can't give enough kudos. BTW, it's truly impossible to nit (Yeah...like this one needs nits...duh...)when your sides ache from laughing so much.
Alan
------------------ When you talk, you say something you already know... If you listen, you might learn something new.
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Evenin' Big Guy,
naw, no trouble...this one is just the work of an over-active imagination<g>. I had to go back in and fix the lines that bugged Anth.
Thanks for the read and the kind words.
dawg
Wisdom does not always accompany age. Sometimes age just shows up alone.
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G'day Ray,
Glad you didn't have to give up your squids to read this lil ditty. Thank you for taking the time to read and for the kind thoughts.
dawg
Wisdom does not always accompany age. Sometimes age just shows up alone.
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Get me in the dawg house.....hell Alan, I live in the dawg house....they named the sucker after me. Me and trouble are like not-quite-but-damn-close-to identicle twins!
So glad you enjoyed. I am always happy to share a smile.
dawg
Wisdom does not always accompany age. Sometimes age just shows up alone.
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witty, crafty, funny,and a whole bunch more of them y words. this is a keeper great job very original...thanks...trush
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Corey's right, somebody's bound to get pissed off sooner or later.....I happen to be mormon and no mormon's I know practice polygamy. We are however strong advocates on family values....Take a look at our Proclamation on the family. I am not from Utah and probably will never go there myself, being from Southern California...but those who practice polygamy and claim they're mormons really aren't. The mormon prophet does not sanction it. Greydog, it's cool if ya' don't wanna be a mormon, but don't dog on a religion because the facts are always misconstrued. Admittidely, your song is hilarious and I find much humor in it, so as people understand that it is a fictional point of view and not an accurate one. God only knows MAN himself would want more than one wife and not get in trouble for it, but monogamy is the way to go. Ask any good mormon.
Greg Watton "A1CWatton"
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Evenin' Greg,
Wasn't really lookin' for a theological debate when I posted this tongue-in-cheek lil number. Let me say right up front that I know all Mormons are not polygamists, all Catholic Priests are not pedophiles, all Jews are not penurious, the Presbytarians are not necessarily God's Frozen People, and it is not necessary in every rural appalachian church wedding to pass the snake before you kiss the bride, not all Islamic Arabs are terrorists and we Southern Baptists may not actually be the only ones to make it to heaven....there, did I miss anybody?
I have made it a lifelong habit to hire Mormons, because they don't drink and they do show up for work every Monday.
However, there has been a case all over the news for the past few years about this backwoods, Utah Morman with five wives, going on six. He and his harum were on Springer, Sally Jesse and Ricky Lake as well as sixty minutes. It was brought out on 60 Minutes the only reason he was prosecuted was that he went on National TV so many times and the Feds were leaning on the State of Utah. The prosecuting DA was the Governor's brother.
Say what you will about not visiting Utah, you gotta admit that Salt Lake City is the Morman equivalent of the Vatican or Jerusalum, and Joseph Smith did have a whole mess of wives. The item about Utah being forced to accept monogamy as a condition for statehood is a matter of state and federal record.
No offense intended, but I am not ready to be that politically correct.<g>
dawg
Wisdom does not always accompany age. Sometimes age just shows up alone.
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