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Saint Bubba an' dem Alligator (c) 2002 dawg

Listen you ears to dis story.
whut happened many long year ago.
You try an be still now, mon chere,
and I'll try to tell it right slow.

The Queen of Delacroix Parrish
was lovely a girl, yes she be.
She had 'bout twelve or ten boyfren'
all intendin' for matrimony.

The Queen, she want her a baby.
a pretty lil chile, just lak you.
But there was dis dragonsized gator
and everyday, he et one or two.

So dem queen, she publish dis paper
saying she promise to marry dem knight
who will kill this pestersome reptile
and somehow, survive dat big fight.

Well, that gator, he et up young Beauregard.
He chewed up both Jacque and Jean Claude.
Sir Pierre Hebert did not have him no prayer
and what didn't get et sure got chawed.

Off to dem eastmost of Baton Rouge
down just below Mobile Bay,
lived a bama boy name of Bubba;
and he rassle dem gators for play.

He heard him the tale of our parish,
where dem gator be eating dem kids.
He packed a pig samwich to munch on
and come to kill him that gator right dead.

He stopped at the queen's castlemansion.
It got an outhouse indoors, I hear tell.
He want to look him eyes on her face
and make sure that she look pretty well.

He loaded his two-barrell shootgun
and honed up his hawksbill knife.
He tucked a six-shooter inside of his belt,
and short-fused his dynamite.

Bubba walked to bank of dem levee,
say, "Come 'ere, come see me tonight."
But dat gator don't come. He see him dem guns
and him don't think that be a fair fight.

So dat gator, he wait, 'til Bubba fall sleep.
Then him crope right up on him good.
His big mouth slam shut, on Bubba's right foot,
which was carved from petrifried wood.

Bubba, he laugh at dat broke toothed ol gator.
said, your cousin got my foot long ago.
Now suck on dis piece of candy,
and shoved dynamite right down his throat.

there was a problem with dat dere wedding.
Dat priest flat said dem queen can't
marry an evangelical snake passin man
so dem Bishop done made him a saint.


[This message has been edited by greydog (edited 09-18-2002).]

Great story telling Dawggy! See you move south on us and use this "talk" ?? Hard for me to follow--had to read slow!!
No wedding huh -I always like them fairy tale endings
Loved the candy trick!
Pam

Its ok to read it slow Pam,

'cause that's the way we talk it. Thanks for the read and response....oh, and apologies to St. George and the dragon.<g>

dawg

Wow, dawg! That was amazing, I garone-tee! Wonderful storytelling and excellent use of the vernacular.

Why thank you, Ms. Karla,

I am glad you like it. Good to see you back on the board.

Thanks for taking the time to read and respond.

dawg

Hi Dawg, just popped in to read a few, and the title really sucked me in, and I'm really glad it did! This is GREAT! I love it!
I had to read it slow, too, but in Kansas the drawl is more prevalent, and easy to understand.Keep up the great work-and I know you will! Roy

Dawg,

Dis heya is a fun one, sho nuff. Guess gator gumbo was served at the reception? Fun story, as always. Dano.

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www.angelfire.com/music3/danolyrics

Hello Roy,

I sure am glad you stopped by, and tickled pink that you like it.

Thanks for taking the time to read and for the mighty kind words.

dawg

Shucks Dano,

this is just like eatin' lettuce....ain't nuthin to it. Stan is due in a couple of hours, so it ain't no telling what you'll see tomorrow.

Thanks for the read and the nice words.

dawg

Hey, Dawg! Had to read slow also but it was worth it! Great story!

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Mary Lou

Evenin' Mary Lou,

and thank you eversomuch for taking the time to read and respond. Sorry if it slowed ya down too much.<g> Glad you liked it.

dawg

Heck Dawg.... if the others had to read it slow, imagine the struggle I'm having - only up to the second verse - get back when I've read it all - probably about the time we land in TN. Might get the old Aussie Crocadile Hunter to take a look at this one. Absolutely loved this, especially the candy bit. Cheers, Judy

Mornin' Sweet Judy from Oz...

Think of it as Steve (the Crocodile Hunter) played by Justin Wilson.<g>

I really am sorry. I didn't realize it would be that hard to read. Thank you for making the effort. We really look forward to meeting you.

dawg

Hi, Dawg! Came back to read it again a couple of times-WOW!!!!! Still like it as much as the first time I read it. What a story! And so well put together! Half-way through it I started checking under my desk for a big ol' crockagater or overly large aladile to come grab me by the leg!Have a superfantabulistical day!!!!!!!!! Roy

Al;l kidding aside Dawg..

You're gettin' REAL good at this stuff...

Really good, accessible story-telling..

This is great stuff..

Let's have more !

Bob

Roy,

I sure hope you are having one of them superlatorical calendar periods your-own-self. It was most kind of you to revisit this lil missive and leave another generous helping of nice words and thoughts.

Sure would like to see you at Pineyfest.

dawg

Why, thank you most humbly,

Bob. High praise indeed from a writer and artist I truly respect and admire.

This is a genre that lends itself to easy writing...now ya got me thinking maybe,
"Beowulf and La Petite Rouge Riding Hood".

Thanks for the wunnerful visit.

dawg

G'day Greydog, Gee Mate you write some good songs and this IS GREAT!.best wishes, Ray in Australia.

Hi Dawg,
Good story,great imagery and imagination.
didn't scare me though,cuz I ain't scared
of them there gators..........
iam scared to read this again....cuz might
just up and start talking like him.


God bless
ClaireJeanne

damn bro.......how long does it take to write one of these novels? I'd NEVER EVER be able to pull off one like this. Very nice! Now get Bob to do his Cajun thing on this and let us hear it!

Good Mornin' Ray,

after toooo many days of rain, it looks like I will get a sunny one today to get outside and do some "weed eating".

Thanks for the read and the kind response. Glad you enjoyed it.

dawg

Awww, ClaireJeanne..chere,

you ain't gots to worry none 'bout dat. Dem cajuns and coon-asses can't even be worried to talk proper lak dis for more dan four or tree days in a row...

Thank you for taking the time to read and for the nice words.

dawg

Mornin' Blake,

Heck I dunno...couple hours maybe, once I decide which direction to write in. It is a fun exercise to write in dialect on occasion.

I probably had more fun writing it than ya'll did reading it. Promise, after lil red riding hood, I won't do anymore for a while.

Thanks for the read and the kindness.

dawg

Hey, Dawg! Took me 20 minutes of searching for this till I found it, but I've got a friend here from out of town, and I really wanted him to see it! He really enjoyed it! So I brought it back to page one, cause we have new members that haven't seen this yet, and it deserves to be read by all! See Ya! Have a superfantabulistical day! Roy

Lordy Roy,

I jes can't not believe you wents to dem troublesome exertions of extractacating dis ting from dem archives. Hoo boy, I sho am glad fo you to see me again.<g>

Thank you Roy,

dawg

Hi Dawg,

Very smooth and entertainin' !

Well, that gator, he et up young Beauregard.
He chewed up both Jacque and Jean Claude.
Sir Pierre Hebert did not have him no prayer
and what didn't get et sure got "chawed"

TT

TT

appreciated and incorporated.

dawg

You got a hell of a good eye. Drop me an email please at greydog8@earthlink.net

Thanks,

d

[This message has been edited by greydog (edited 09-18-2002).]

Hey, Dawg! I jest reeded it to my number one son, he loveded it too, also! See Ya! Roy

HI Dee Dawg!

LOVE it when ya Cooks Cajun, Bud'!

Any writer who rhymes "Can't" with "Saint" gets MY Hat Tip!

"KUDOS" for an Extremely FUN, Well-Written One!

Big Guy-Hug,
Stan

Well Roy,

We can always hope that even if it is genetic, science will one day find a cure.

Thanks for the comeback, and say hello to the kid.<g>

dawg

Thankee Stan,

still don't understand why this one is back up after a four month vacation. (easily confused)

Muchos gracious fer the kudos.

dawg

Hey Dawg!

A new genre of literature here: Cajun Short-Story Poetry... What a fun read!!

Uncle Chuck

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http://www.soundclick.com/bands/athabaxtra.htm

Tastes like tchikken.

Funny thing is that this read easily for me because this is how we parody our own Quebecois Prime Minister... and as you probably know, Cajuns are descendants of French Canadians who made their way to (then French) Louisiana when the British expelled them from Atlantic Canada many years ago.

Now you know the rest of the story.

Thas me, Unca Chuck

Puttin the "mar" in niche MARket.<g>

dawg

Allo John,

dat story I already done knewed. Bernard is what kind name you tink anyway. My granpere never did speak mush anglais.

Merci pour les read.

Le dawg

Cripes, Dawg, I's tinkin you bloody good at dis! Gorblimey, i's willin' ta giv me vitals fur bin able ta writ lak dis! ....Dang, it's dashed difficult keeping up that talk, how do you do it??? :-)
Pramod

Ohhhhhhhhhh dawg! A big thanks to Roy for pushing this one back up for us newbies! I have to say, Dawg, that I simply had to go take another look at that picture of you Bobbie had sent as I was reading this one! This one is getting printed out, read to the yung ones, and put in the book for favorite reads! Incredible talent, sir!
Teri

greydog
There are wordsmiths and then there are wordsmiths but there's only one "dawg".Man, if this doesn't end up being a movie, there otta be a law. Greaaaaat lyric

VNORTH

Teri- I got your message of thanks, and you are very welcome. When I read this 4 months ago, it made such an impression on me that it was pretty hard to forget, so I just had to do it. Dawg is one of this sites "premeir writers" as far as I'm concerned, and I couldn't see this buried forever in the previous pages area. Glad you liked it, and I was able to help you enjoy it. (Wished I'da wrote it!) LOL! See ya! Roy

Hello Pramod,

I really only write dialog lyrics on rare occasions. I couldn't make a steady diet of it...although I do write a few articles in dialect for minor publications.

Thanks for the read and taking the time to respond.

dawg

Actually Teri,

Bobbie doesn't like me to read responses like yours. She prefers to read them to me, substituting the term "B.S." for any favorable adjectives or superlatives. Says I get a more accurate rendition that way.<g>

Thank you ever so kindly.

dawg

Hello VNorth,

any kin to Ollie? Our sons actually wrestled each other in a prep school match many years ago and I got to meet him briefly.

Glad you enjoyed it. Always happy to share a smile.

dawg

greydog

No. Never even met him. Did your son beat the cr*p out of Ollie's boy. VNORTH stands for Vancouver which of course is north. I've only been here about 2 weeks and have read lots of stuff and your's was right at the top of the heap. Also read muggy morning blues. Man they're gonna take a good look at your brain when you go.

VNORTH



[This message has been edited by VNORTH (edited 09-19-2002).]

Dear V..<G>

I JUST HAD to thank you for that little bit of potential ammo! LOL I suspect there will be a lineup wanting to examine the Dawg's brain when he departs this plane...(which I hope is a long time from now..honest. )

Bobbie (aka Mrs Dawg)

Honest, Van,

I don't even remember which of them one. Since he and I were both former Marines and this was at the height of the Iran-Contra hearings all I asked was how he got such a good looking secretary as Fawn Hall.<g>

By the way, you would not believe what subject Ollie used to give a two hour lecture on at OCS in Quantico.

dawg

greydog

OK I give up!

VNORTH

Bump

I like it! The dialect does make comprehension a bit more difficult, but adds a certain flavor and charm that would be missing otherwise.

Keep writing.

Skip

Dang, Brought tears to my eyes to read Dawgs stuff again. Nobody writes like Dawg did.
I don't have any trouble with comprehension, maybe cause I've heard the English language pretty well murdered at times anyway
Wy

Wow... this one caught me off guard... I saw the name on the screen and the tears just wouldn't stay back... Dawg had an amazing way with words... no doubt about it.. and he was a "wunnerful" sweet friend!
Here's to the angel in overalls... a truly "preshus" part of JPF history... Trudi