Who's Online Now
12 members (Fdemetrio, Bill Draper, Gary E. Andrews, Guy E. Trepanier, JAPOV, couchgrouch, ckiphen, Gavin Sinclair, 2 invisible), 1,222 guests, and 761 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Register Today!
Welcome to the Just Plain Folks forums! You are currently viewing our forums as a Guest which gives you limited access to most of our discussions and to other features.

By joining our free community you will have access to post and respond to topics, communicate privately with our users (PM), respond to polls, upload content, and access many other features. Registration is fast, simple, and absolutely free; so please join our community today!
ShoutChat
Comment Guidelines: Do post respectful and insightful comments. Don't flame, hate, spam.
What's Going On
Boss Tribute
by Fdemetrio - 04/17/24 10:57 PM
Noah Wotherspoon, Cappy's Wine, Loveland
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/17/24 10:18 PM
Problem I foresee with ai
by Craig Allen - 04/17/24 10:08 PM
What my heart denied
by Bill Draper - 04/17/24 06:11 PM
Donovan Tolle music
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/17/24 02:30 PM
Above the Tortoise
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/17/24 12:46 PM
Wasting My Time
by Fdemetrio - 04/17/24 12:20 PM
More fun and aggravation
by Fdemetrio - 04/16/24 02:14 PM
New Music Creation Tool Changes Everything
by Fdemetrio - 04/16/24 01:08 PM
Having too much fun
by Sunset Poet - 04/16/24 09:28 AM
Mutlu
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/15/24 07:08 PM
Werhun Band
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/15/24 12:50 PM
One Kiss At A Time (Carroll Kiphen's lyric)
by ckiphen - 04/15/24 08:45 AM
Boss Bioptic Coming
by Fdemetrio - 04/14/24 12:00 AM
I made you money on spotify
by Fdemetrio - 04/13/24 02:01 PM
Inspirational Videos Post Them Here
by Sunset Poet - 04/13/24 10:22 AM
Argyle Theatre at Babalon Village,
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/13/24 05:57 AM
Hulkster a Christian
by Fdemetrio - 04/13/24 12:29 AM
Name That Tune Challenge
by John Lawrence Schick - 04/12/24 03:49 PM
Does Billy Joel belong in top 10?
by Fdemetrio - 04/12/24 11:21 AM
Fox News Reports Stunning Archeological Discovery.
by Fdemetrio - 04/12/24 11:19 AM
WORLD5 - Review Upcoming Album "3" by ViriAOR
by World5 Music - 04/12/24 11:19 AM
Bossa Nova Beatniks
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/09/24 01:30 PM
2 Miles Deep
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/08/24 11:09 PM
Fire Tiger
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/07/24 12:01 PM
Highly effective country boy
by bennash - 04/06/24 01:24 PM
The Rant Arena
by JAPOV - 04/05/24 07:24 PM
The Wolves Of Fading
by bennash - 04/05/24 04:41 PM
Mark At The Park, Cadiz, Ohio
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/05/24 03:14 PM
Donovan Plant
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/05/24 01:50 PM
Top Posters
Calvin 19,857
Travis david 12,264
Kevin Emmrich 10,941
Jean Bullock 10,330
Kaley Willow 10,240
Two Singers 9,649
Joice Marie 9,186
Mackie H. 9,003
glynda 8,683
Mike Dunbar 8,574
Tricia Baker 8,318
couchgrouch 8,164
Colin Ward 7,911
Corey 7,357
Vicarn 6,916
Mark Kaufman 6,589
ben willis 6,114
Lynn Orloff 5,788
Louis 5,725
Linda Sings 5,608
KimberlyinNC 5,210
Fdemetrio 5,099
Neil Cotton 4,909
Derek Hines 4,893
DonnaMarilyn 4,670
Blake Hill 4,528
Bob Cushing 4,389
Roy Cooper 4,271
Bill Osofsky 4,199
Tom Shea 4,195
Cindy Miller 4,178
TamsNumber4 4,171
Sunset Poet 4,163
MFB III 4,143
nightengale 4,096
E Swartz 3,985
JAPOV 3,983
beechnut79 3,878
Caroline 3,865
Kolstad 3,845
Dan Sullivan 3,710
Dottie 3,427
joewatt 3,411
Bill Cooper 3,279
John Hoffman 3,199
Skip Johnson 3,027
Pam Hurley 3,007
Terry G 3,005
Nigel Quin 2,891
PopTodd 2,890
Harriet Ames 2,870
MidniteBob 2,761
Nelson 2,616
Tom Tracy 2,558
Jerry Jakala 2,524
Al Alvarez 2,499
Eric Thome 2,448
Hummingbird 2,401
Stan Loh 2,263
Sam Wilson 2,246
Wendy D 2,235
Judy Hollier 2,232
Erica Ellis 2,202
maccharles 2,134
TrumanCoyote 2,096
Marty Helly 2,041
DukeWill 2,002
floyd jane 1,985
Clint Anglin 1,904
cindyrella 1,888
David Wright 1,866
Clairejeanne 1,851
Cindy LaRosa 1,824
Ronald Boyt 1,675
Iggy 1,652
Noel Downs 1,633
Rick Heenan 1,608
Cal 1,574
GocartMoz 1,559
Jack Swain 1,554
Pete Larsen 1,537
Ann Tygart 1,529
Tom Breshers 1,487
RogerS 1,481
Tom Franz 1,473
Chuck Crowe 1,441
Ralph Blight 1,440
Rick Norton 1,429
Kenneth Cade 1,429
bholt 1,411
Letha Allen 1,409
in2piano 1,404
Stan Simons 1,402
Deej56 1,385
mattbanx 1,384
Jen Shaner 1,373
Charlie Wong 1,347
KevinP 1,324
Vondelle 1,316
Tom W. 1,313
Jan Petter 1,301
scottandrew 1,294
lane1777 1,280
Gerry 1,280
DakLander 1,265
IronKnee 1,262
PeteG 1,242
Ian Ferrin 1,235
VNORTH2 1,220
Glen King 1,214
IdeaGuy 1,209
AaronAuthier 1,177
summeoyo 1,174
Diane Ewing 1,162
ckiphen 1,124
joro 1,082
BobbyJoe 1,075
S.DEE 1,040
yann 1,037
9ne 1,035
David Gill 1,034
Tony A 1,016
argo 986
peaden 984
90 dB 964
Wolvman 960
Jak Kelly 912
krtinberg 890
Drifter 886
Petra 883
RJC 845
Brenda152 840
Nadia 829
ant 798
Juan 797
TKO 784
Dayson 781
frahmes 781
bennash 771
teletwang 762
Andy K 750
Andy Kemp 749
tbryson 737
Jackie444 731
Irwin 720
3daveyO3 704
Dixie 701
Joy Boy 695
Pat Hardy 692
Knute 686
Lee Arten 678
Moosesong 668
Katziis 652
R.T.MOORE 638
quality 637
CG King 622
douglas 621
R&M 614
Mel 614
NaomiSue 601
Shandy 590
Ria 587
TAMERA64 583
qbaum 570
nitepiano 566
pRISCILLA 556
Tink2 553
musica 539
deanbell 528
RobertK 527
BonzaiWag 523
Roderic 522
BB Wilbur 513
goodfolks 499
Zeek 487
Stu 486
Steve P. 481
KathyW 462
allenb 459
MaxG 458
Philjo 454
fanito 448
trush48 448
dmk 442
Rob L 439
arealrush 437
DGR 436
avweek 435
Stephen D 433
Emmy 431
marquez 422
kit 419
Softkrome 417
kyrksongs 415
RRon 408
Laura G. 407
VNORTH 407
Debra 407
eb 406
cuebald 399
EdPerrone 399
Dannyk1 395
Hobart 395
Davyboy49 393
Smile 389
GJShades 387
Alek 386
Ezt 384
tone 380
Marla 380
Ann_F 379
iggyiggy 378
coalminer 377
java 374
ddreuter 371
spidey 371
sweetsong 370
Rob B. 369
danny 367
Jim Ryan 360
papaG 353
Z - man 350
JamesDF5 348
John K 348
Jaden 344
TheBaz 340
Steggy 339
leif 339
tonedeaf 336
rickwork 334
Eddie Ray 332
Johnboy 328
Bob Lever 328
Helicon1 327
lucian 326
Muskie 321
kc 319
Z. Mulls 318
ptondreau 313
ONOFFON 312
Chris B. 310
trush 304
ed323 297
Ellen M 294
markus-ky 293
lizzorn 291
nicnac49 290
Char 286
ktunes 285
Top Likes Received
JAPOV 86
VNORTH2 45
bennash 38
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Rate Thread
#238520 10/13/04 05:26 AM
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,473
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,473
http://www.soundclick.com/pro/default.cfm?BandID=193307&content=music

Simple Guy
Words and Music By Tom Franz
© 2004

V1
Sometimes I want to be by myself
No offence to anybody else
I’m not mad and I’m not depressed
Just need some time to reassess
My position in society
What are my responsibilities
Oh I am just a simple guy

Chorus
Yeah yeah yeah
I'm a simple guy
Yeah yeah yeah
I'm just a simple guy
V2
I’ve got a dog I wish I had a truck
We drive around and temp lady luck
We’d take the back roads out to the beach
Then we’d turn north until we reach
That little cove that looks so sweet
We’d walk the sunset and be at peace
Oh I have got simple dreams

Chorus

V3
I’ve got a guitar and I have an amp
I play all day until my fingers cramp
I write songs about vice and sin
My favorite part is when the drums kick in
I look for power deep inside a song
I’ll keep on looking until my hearing’s gone
And that should not be very long

Chorus

#238521 10/13/04 09:42 AM
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 5,725
Top 50 Poster
Offline
Top 50 Poster
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 5,725
Tom you got a nice voice, like what you did with the lyrics, chorus need something more I think. [Linked Image]


http://www.soundclick.com/louistwinn

"If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away." Thoreau
#238522 10/13/04 10:13 AM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 378
B
Serious Contributor
Offline
Serious Contributor
B
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 378
Hi Tom,
I think the lyric is maybe a wee bit *too* simple in places - mainly the last line which is getting into territory inhabited by the likes of Arthur Lee's "Expressions tell everything, I see one on you" - mind you, he got away with that one so what do I know! Musically and vocally this has a great feel, the dynamics are perfect and I love the harmonies on the chorus (I'd fade out on the chorus repeating over and over - Louis got it right, more chorus please!). This has a lot of potential (I've listened to it four times and it definitely grows on you) but the lyric needs a (short) visit to "the song doctor"
Bob


Bob Leslie
#238524 10/13/04 02:21 PM
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,473
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,473
Louis,
Thank you. Yeah, the chorus is unique. I was trying to be inspired by Cobain. I guess that is why there was only one of him.

Bob,
More Chorus too. So do you think more message or just longer? Good idea to fade out. I hate going to the song doctor. They are alway poking around asking questions and stuff. But I'll go. Thanks for the listens and your kind words.

Sqbaum,
<wiping eyes> I never got a hot vote before! Pretty good idea on the twist at the end. Simple guys would be a bit grumpy by nature.I'll talk to the song doctor about it when I see him or her. And I am begining to get the point the chorus leaves something to be desired. Let me ask you do you think I should dump the distorted guitar and stay acoustic? Thank you for the listen and your good thoughts.

#238525 10/13/04 03:14 PM
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 86
D
DAC Offline
Serious Contributor
Offline
Serious Contributor
D
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 86
Tom,

Gave Simple Guy a listen and I have to agree with the other comments. The song starts out mellow, which is cool followed by the chorus kicking in (which I thought was kind of cool because it kind of came out of nowhere) then mellows out into the second verse. So far so good. My "problem" is that after the 2nd chorus the song does not really go anywhere...emotion-wise. A cool bridge section would have been nice to hear which could have lead back into the 3rd verse...I liked the word painting in the 3rd verse when you sang about liking when the drums kick in (and they did at that point), but I think the 3rd verse could have been stronger musically... Not bad though.. I am speaking from a Rocker's point of view as I am pretty long distance when it comes to country...

This is weird but the song kinda started out sounding like a Tom Petty song (which ain't bad).. You may want to refine it a bit..

Hope this helps..

DAC

#238526 10/13/04 03:21 PM
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,473
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,473
Thank you DAC, good idea on the bridge. I will work on that. I think you might be right that a break from the sameness of the melody and emotion could be a good thing.

#238527 10/13/04 03:29 PM
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 327
H
Serious Contributor
Offline
Serious Contributor
H
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 327
I gotta tell ya Tom -

"My favorite part is when the drums kick in"

is just a KILLER line!
Especially when the drums kick in!

It's comin' along good.
Try to re-record the chorus instead of leavin' it pasted. Get your vocal levels on up there in the chorus at least as loud as in the verses, and do that sweet little harmony thing you do, and that will go a long way.

I think you're doing great work.


------------------
Chris

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/6/chrisgarrettmusic.htm

#238528 10/13/04 04:14 PM
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 86
D
DAC Offline
Serious Contributor
Offline
Serious Contributor
D
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 86
Tom,

Great to see you are open to suggestions. It's the only way to learn. I agree on the vocals in the chorus as they are a bit weak and can't be heard as clearly as they could be. Its cool how the chorus comes in so it is key that the vocals come up there. As far as emotion, I find it helps to drive the song as you get to the end. Remember though, I am approaching this as i would write in the "rock" vein. If you go to:

www.soundclick.com/bands/7/davecostellomusic.htm

I have a Contemporary Christian "rock" song called Only in You that you can click on and see what I mean...

Keep going man....

DAC

#238529 10/13/04 04:25 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 378
B
Serious Contributor
Offline
Serious Contributor
B
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 378
Hi again, Tom,
The more I listen to this (about 8 times now), the more the simple statements in each line seem to fit the basic premise of the song, so it's grown on me. That last line has got to go though! Even Arthur Lee couldn't get away with that one!
As far as the chorus is concerned, I don't mind its minimalist approach and I like the guitar as it is. Repeats of what you've got would do me. This song is turning into one of those niggly ones I can't get out of my head. It's gradually pushing out "Pancho And Lefty" which has been driving me crazy since Sunday when I went to a Townes Van Zandt Memorial Concert (4th year running here in Glasgow and jam-packed full) and heard J.T. Van Zandt do his dad's songs (and John does them great). Yes, I think the federales are riding off now but this simple guy's just come in and put his boots on the table. I'd better go off and write one and clear my head . . .
All the best,
Bob


Bob Leslie
#238530 10/13/04 04:35 PM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 378
B
Serious Contributor
Offline
Serious Contributor
B
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 378
Here's a suggestion:
Do two choruses at the end of V2 but take the second one up a key; then do an instrumental break; then last verse and go out on repeats of the chorus. Scrap present last line of V3 and substitute "And that's my simple song" - every other verse ends with a "simple" reference so that would complete the pattern. All suggestions free of charge but if it hits number one a contribution to the pension fund would be gratefully accepted by my bank manager,
Complicated Old Bob


Bob Leslie
#238531 10/13/04 04:46 PM
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 327
H
Serious Contributor
Offline
Serious Contributor
H
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 327
Hey - COB!
I kinda like that! [Linked Image]

#238532 10/13/04 05:08 PM
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,473
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,473
Trust me all these suggestions are SO WELCOME. I am going to study them and respond properly but

Bob,
I just got to ask how do you take it up a key??? the cords are Am G D on the chorus. Whatwould they be if I took it up a key?
I alway like when I hear that in a song but I never knew how to do it.

#238533 10/13/04 06:00 PM
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,041
Likes: 2
Top 200 Poster
Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 2,041
Likes: 2
Up one full step - Bm A E

Enjoyed the listen.

------------------
Marty listen here

Is there a setting on the digital delay that will allow me to think before I speak?


Marty my home

Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again!
#238534 10/13/04 06:03 PM
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 327
H
Serious Contributor
Offline
Serious Contributor
H
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 327
Or use a capo.

#238535 10/14/04 12:13 AM
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 378
B
Serious Contributor
Offline
Serious Contributor
B
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 378
When you get to the D, instead of playing a full bar, play 3 beats then 1 beat of F#7, then start again with Bm A E.
Bob


Bob Leslie
#238536 10/16/04 11:46 PM
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 8,318
Top 20 Poster
Offline
Top 20 Poster
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 8,318
I love it when you guys talk all techy and stuff. It gets me...........cross eyed trying to get my brain to process it all. It's over my head. [Linked Image] I like the song, though. I'm not too simple to listen!!!

------------------
"Shoot for the moon, and even if you miss, you will land among the stars." -- Les Brown
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/8/triciabakermusic.htm


"Grits is one of those country-boy words that is both singular and plural-like deer, elk and sheep. I think the singular is appropriate when there's a modifier that makes it clear one is talking about something specific. Like, 'Grits are good for you, but these here grits is tasty.'"~~Joe Wrabek
#238537 10/17/04 01:00 AM
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 473
Top 500 Poster
Offline
Top 500 Poster
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 473
Hey Tom,

I really like the song. I had to listen to some of your other stuff to compare.
Being able to mix folk and power chord rock is great. I love style mixing when it works.
Your voice is reminicient of David Bowie or Ric Ocasek.
You could fill in some of the bare spots, but that might mess with the great vocal.
Its hard to describe what it is about it. its not a 'top of the pop charts' song - more like 'everyones favorite album cut'. and personally I think the best music is not what gets released as singles.
I also think you should try putting it under alternative rock instead of country. It just might be a 'top of the college charts' kind of song.

Doug

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/6/dougbarnett.htm
http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/dougbarnett
http://barnett.artgirlstudios.com/index.htm

#238538 10/17/04 03:08 PM
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,473
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,473
Doug,
Thanks so much. You made my day with your comments. Is that Ric Ocasek the Cars guy? Everything you said is such a compliment.
I never have any idea how to categorize my music. Because the truth is I am not the hugest country fan, I am becoming more of a fan as my knowledge of the craft of songwriting improves. But I heard this one band I liked in Alternative Country called Uncle Tupelo, so I chose that category.
So Alternative Rock you think, I’ll try that in the future.
Thanks again,
Tom

#238539 10/20/04 04:05 AM
Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 4,297
Top 100 Poster
Offline
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 4,297
Tom,
I actually heard this a few days ago... got a bit distracted, but I'm finally back! [Linked Image]

Ok, the songwriting is fine, the message good with cute title & hook. The vocals: very good and instrumental performance excellent! Also, the production ain't too bad either.

All around, good job. This song delivers!
The rest is a matter of "tweaking" to suit depending on how fancy a "simple guy" wants to get! [Linked Image]

Marty, Chris & Bob all have great advice about the modulation. Bob's 3 beat transition followed by F#7 on the 4th count before continuing with the Bm, could be the ticket if you like it. Regardless, going from Am to Bm gives you a two semi-tone pitch lift. In this case it's a whole chord, but or course it's still 2 semi-tones.

If you only wanted to go up one semi-tone, you'd have to modulate to Bmb (B minor flat) followed by Ab and Eb, etc.
Not too difficult if you know where your bar chords are on the guitar... otherwise we'll save that for another lesson! [Linked Image]

Anyway, all fun stuff & good taking with you!

Michael B.


There's nothing remarkable about it. All one has to do is hit the right keys at the right time and the instrument plays itself. -- Johann Sebastian Bach

MichaelBorges.com
LicenseQuote.com
#238540 10/20/04 04:59 AM
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,473
Top 200 Poster
OP Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 1,473
Michael,
Thanks so much for the positive review and your advice. I am going to try to take it up a full key. I have always liked that when I have heard it in other songs and I was never sure how to do it. I can’t wait to try it.
Let me ask you one more question about taking it up a key, if I do that on the chorus of the second verse the third verse and final chorus will have to all be in that elevated key right?
Thanks,
Tom

#238541 10/27/04 04:11 AM
Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 4,297
Top 100 Poster
Offline
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 4,297
Tom,
Just happened to get back here to see your question. Yes, everything after the key change
(verse & chorus, etc.) will stay in the new key.

I don't use the "Key change" technique on each project, but on some songs it can really help set it apart! [Linked Image]

Michael B.


There's nothing remarkable about it. All one has to do is hit the right keys at the right time and the instrument plays itself. -- Johann Sebastian Bach

MichaelBorges.com
LicenseQuote.com

Link Copied to Clipboard
Support Just Plain Folks

We would like to keep the membership in Just Plain Folks FREE! Your donation helps support the many programs we offer including Road Trips and the Music Awards.


Newest Members
chriscastle, yasir252, cathennashira, Samwise, HappySousa
21,470 Registered Users
Forum Statistics
Forums117
Topics125,752
Posts1,161,269
Members21,470
Most Online37,523
Jan 25th, 2020
Just Plain Quotes
"When will we all, as artists, creators and facilitators learn that the so-called experts in our lives are nothing more than someone who has stepped forward and called themselves an expert?" –Brian Austin Whitney
Today's Birthdays
bobmahoney (37), Severe (46)
Popular Topics(Views)
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5