JPF Home Page Forums Lyric and MP3 Feedback MP3 Feedback Forum Send Me---OPINIONS WANTED!

It's the first song on my Soundclick. Any comments--pro or con--are appreciated. Thank you!

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/6/jeanlmusic.htm

SEND ME
Copyright 2004 by Jean Larson


Where there is sorrow, send me
Where there's confusion, send me
Where there is suffering, send me
Oh Lord, send me

I’ll be a gentle hand, You’ll wipe the tears
I’ll be a shoulder while she leans on You
I’ll be a voice, You speak to his heart
Holy Spirit, won’t You shine
Through me

Where there is darkness, send me
Where there is hunger, send me
Where there is loneliness, send me
Oh Lord, send me

I’ll be an ear, y\You will hear her pain
I’ll be a gentle voice, You’ll calm his fears
I’ll be a friend, You’ll give her all she needs
Holy Spirit, won’t you shine
Through me

BRIDGE
I don’t have the words
I don’t know the need
Father, You are the answer to everything
I will follow, You lead

Though I am not brave, send me
Though I am weakest, send me
Though I am not wise, send me
Oh Lord, send me
Oh Lord, send me

THANKS FOR ANY COMMENTS ON THIS!!! --Jean

Hi Jean, (not to be confused with hygene, though I'm sure yours is fine)

I listened to "Send Me" as a lo-fi Streaming Audio. The "noise" level is pretty high, since you recorded it in a room at home (even professionally mixed and mastered tracks get noisy through lo-fi Streaming). But I was able to hear all of it.

First, your voice is really lovely. Simple and pure. Reminds me a little of Sarah Brightman.

I think the reason some people may not stop to review a song such as yours is partially due to their first reaction at hearing a "noisy" track, and partially due to seeing a forthright Christian ("churchy") song. But, in this case (despite my post elsewhere), your song is actually rather good. It doesn't follow traditional form, with your having verse and chorus melody, but changing lyrics each time. However, for the genre into which it belongs, it fits. This is the style of a lot of Vinyard songs, or like Matt Redman -- more worship oriented, and designed for reflection or even for corporate worship.

I like its simplicity. I think that, if it were mine, I might look again at the flow and chord structure of the bridge. I think the minors might be a little heavy. If you are interested in suggestions for "majoring" it a little (not necessarily entirely), let me know.

In short, I like it.

Baz/Erik
www.eriktyler.com



------------------
"The only way to get anywhere is to cross a few lines."

Baz--

Thank you for your detailed critique!!

Yes, the sound quality stinks, but that's the best I can do for now.

I am not happy with the bridge chords, either. Actually, not quite satisfied with the bridge melody, although I have changed it a little since I made that recording. (Sometimes a weak part of a song evolves over time into something better, especially if I quit working on it and just sing it "freely.")

If you have a suggestion off the top of your head for the bridge chords, I'd be glad to hear it. I agree it's a little heavy on the minor, which doesn't quite match the lyric there, and it's a little awkward.

Not looking to collaborate, so suggest at your own risk , but I am willing to entertain almost any suggestions--I always try them out.

Thanks again for the critique! --Jean

sqbaum--Thank you for the critique! I REALLY appreciate your taking the time to listen and comment!

(A lot of my posts get a "zero" and then keep dropping down until they are out of sight!)

Yes, it's me singing & playing piano. In fact, I think I had the tape recorder in my lap. I also don't have the right cords when I send it into the computer, to make it come out of both speakers later when people listen. I'm just excited that I can even record and get it into the computer. Thanks for listening through the noise!

A friend recorded another song for me, "Don't Be Long Away"--with a little too much reverb and some static, but otherwise a much better recording, but it was a hassle so I don't want to ask too often. If I decide to add this one to my band's CD, it'll finally be a clean and clear version--and way better than just me and the piano, with the whole band taking part.

Sorry, I'm rambling! Thanks for listening to the song. I appreciate the feedback! --Jean

Yes, very funny! Actually, I've heard that quite a few times! My dad used to like saying, "Good health! I mean, Hi Jean!" --Jean

Jean,
Fine song, moves right along. Has a great message and sounds very sing-able too!

If it was shortened just a bit, and maybe slowed down some, I could see this used as a new worship song for the whole congregation, but it would also work great as a performance song.

Excellent material, just needs some recording help, that's all!

Keep up the good work!
Michael

Michael--Thank you for taking the time to listen and comment! I really appreciate it!

Yes, it needs "recording help"! I don't think you could get more rinky-dink than the way I record! If the band at church wants to, I'll put it on the CD we are theoretically going to record sometime soon, then we'll have a decent recording--and it'll have bass, drums, and possibly electric guitar, so it'll be a lot nicer.

Thanks for your comments. I sang it in church last Sunday when it was only 3 days old (kind of scary) and it went over really well. My drummer listened to it once before the service and joined in, and my bass player (my son) just played along without having heard it at all--and they added SO MUCH to the song. I got a lot of thank-yous after the service. The theme for the service happened to be letting the Holy Spirit guide us and use us, so the song really fit.

Thanks again for the review! Have a great day! --Jean

[This message has been edited by JL (edited 09-07-2004).]

Jean , this is absolutely beautiful...
the melody is refreshing...and so very catchy..!!!!!....

You do a beautiful job on the backing...
something I've only been able to do once...
(and not saying it was beautiful...just that i did it.. )......

understand on the limited facilities....
and wish you well on that...I surely would love to hear this if you are able to do another recording. I think it is very nice....and I liked your bridge.

best wishes.......
Kaley

Kaley--Thank you so much for listening and commenting!

Thanks for the compliments, too.

Liked the bridge, huh?....hm....

"Backing"....??? Did I do backing? What was it?

--Jean

[This message has been edited by JL (edited 09-08-2004).]

Hi Jean, I've said elsewhere that I don't usually review Christian songs but I'll make an exception in your case because you've taken the trouble to craft your song, it has a great hook (like the old Sankey hymns) and you play and sing beautifully. I would scrap the "Holy Spirit" and put in the same "Oh, Lord" you have elsewhere - too many syllables, it sounds a bit forced. Beautiful chords except for the bridge which is just a bit too predictable and sounds like it was stuck in just to break up the song. If you can find some more of those original little inflections you use in the verse then you'll have a strong song that this old unbeliever could imagine himself harmonising with at a music session (I always join in with "Let The Circle"!). The recording quality: gaaaaaah! Get a decent soundcard, a cheap recording program (Cakewalk apparently do a good cheapy) and a decent mic. Then you could overlay the harmonies the chorus needs.
Cheers from Agnostia,
Bob
Check out my latest
- The Cultural Imperialists Have Got Me -
at http://www.soundclick.com/bands/3/boblesliemusic.htm

Jean...

backing ?....well...I'm trying to learn how to do them...so someone can sing over the piano..... like you're doing. a lovely job, Jean.........see, I hear melody
and my right and left hand seem to know what to do....but when i separate the melody line.....then it's difficult...uh...very difficult...for me to just..get notes out
that don't compete with the melody line....
of the vocalist...if that makes any sense.
I've done it successfully once...according
to the folks at Echo Project Studio...
on a collab with Noel.....but that's with a
bunch of other musicians..taking the lead...
and me following.... Anyways...I notice that you do it well.......and I think that is really neat..... I'm going to keep trying to do learn ....as folks seem to think i should be able to....(i'm just not convinced of it yet ).........

best wishes Jean...
Kaley

Bob--Thanks for the review, especially since it's not your "thang." I really appreciate your taking the time and effort to give me some feedback.

So, one more vote against the bridge...still messing around with it, so hopefully it will improve.

Thanks for the compliment...that I "crafted" my song...but actually I just sat down and let it flow out--like I do all my songs. Been criticized for that before. I'm supposed to make drafts on paper and rewrite and rewrite and rewrite if I want to make something good...but my best approach is to just let the Spirit flow and stay out of the way. I'll still take the compliment, though!

Thanks for your suggestions! --Jean

Kaley--Thanks for the clarification. I think you mean you like how I accompany myself...?? I don't do a whole lot. You probably don't need me to tell you this, but I play very simply, just keep the beat, when I'm singing, so as not to get in the way, and because I can't think about that many things at once.

On this recording, I was thinking really hard about the words because I don't know my own song very well yet, so I didn't do much on the piano. Like you, when it comes to playing an actual melody, I have to think harder, or practice it a little more. But, I'm so open-minded about it, I don't care if I play the RIGHT melody or not, just something similar or something that sounds good. Most of the time, I play lots of wrong notes and just use them & make them sound like they were supposed to be there.

It takes practice in general, and practice on a particular song, to get good at just supporting on some parts and letting the piano take the lead on other parts. I usually just do "fill" on the piano, in between singing, like at the end of phrases and stuff. In fact, it seems most of my own songs are set up to allow time for fill from another instrument, so I guess I like that kind of thing. It's really fun with my band because we all listen to each other and play off of each other, and try to stay out of each other's way or harmonize. It's a blast!

When I first tried to sing and play at the same time, I had to just do REALLY simple chords, plain quarter notes, and nothing fancy...but over time it's gotten easier and easier with practice. It was a while before I would let anyone hear me sing and play together, and now, after a LOT of experience doing that, I kind of like what I hear coming from the keyboard most times.

Sorry for rambling. I just drank a coke. Makes me talk too much and type too much too!

My advice to you about "backing" is, keep playing around with it, and be really easy on yourself about it, and soon you'll be really good at it. I love your playing, by the way.

Now that I understand your compliment...I've got a warm glow and a big smile. Thank you!! You made my day! --Jean

Thanks for the input, everybody. I have fixed up the lyric a little--shortened up the "Holy Spirit" line so it doesn't sound rushed, took out a few more extraneous words, and fixed on spot where I used the same word twice.

Also changed the bridge melody and chords slightly, and now I kind of like it.

Thanks for the reviews and suggestions. --Jean

Howdy Miss Jean,

Very caring and giving thoughts. I'd love to hear you perform this during our communion procession. I go to a very large church and communion always takes several minutes. We are usually treated to emotionally uplifting songs by our piano/solist. Your church is lucky to have you.

Thank you, Joseph, for your kind words, and for listening to the song!

I like that I get to pick my own songs for communion. I usually slip in something really contemplative. Luckily, it takes a long time. The congregation usually sings at least 3 songs, and I start with a solo if I have something special, and have another good one waiting for the end if we need it. I'm glad you have somebody good who adds to the service at your church. I hope people there tell him/her often how much they appreciate the music. I'm sure you do.

I get to pick something to sing or play during collection, too, and I usually use that as an excuse to give them something really loud or really funky--and appropriate, of course.

I don't know what I'd do without music in worship. It's what speaks to me most clearly and speaks FOR me best, too. Music is a huge blessing!

Sorry for rambling! Thanks for listening & giving your response! I appreciate it! --Jean