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Here is a song that has had three versions posted on JPF. Travis wrote the original lyrics and collabed with Michael Z for one production, then collabed with Mimmo for a different production approach on a 2nd version. I really liked this song in both earlier vibes, but I just "felt" another 3rd vibe utilizing Mimmo's great chorus melody saddled into a different verse melody/bridge direction. I started playing around with the song on my acoustic guitar and a 3rd production was born--with Travis's and Mimmo's blessing. I really liked the idea of this song's theme and felt there are probably millions of folks out there that could relate to these lyrics. I had to make a few changes and additions with Travis's approval for some changes lyrically for music accomodation. So here is a tri-lab songwrite between Ohio-USA/Canada/UK--hope you enjoy the song, and comments surely welcome! - steady-eddie.


SWEET DREAMS - music/lyrics by: vaughan/mercu/swartz

SWEET DREAMS



Vs 1)
I’ve dreamt about her and wanted her so, every moment I’ve slept
But the pathway’s crowded, leading up to where, all my secrets are kept
Trying hard, to get over that, I might not see her again
Night after night, bliss turns to sorrow it’s always the same….it's always the same

Ch 1)

Bring me sweet dreams, won’t you bring me sweet dreams; send me only sweet dreams tonight
Pick me up, and carry me away to wherever, she may be
And when my head, touches my pillow won’t you take me there?
Sweet….dreams…….. Are waiting for me……..

Vs 2)

I wonder if, she misses me, cause’ I’m still missing her
Parting friends, only makes it harder; maybe she still cares
I’m not so sure we fell out of love, could we try it again?
After all, that time together it just can’t be the end…… no it can’t be the end

Repeat Ch 2)

Bridge)


Took a chance and called her
Told her couldn’t get her out of my mind
She said I dream about you every night
My dreams are yours and yours are mine

Solo Strings)

Repeat Ch tag (Key Change)

Outro) Oh yeah, sweet dreams are waiting for me :


Last edited by E Swartz; 11/22/20 09:57 PM.
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Excellent. Great production quality, vocals are spot on and the words perfect. Wouldn't change a thing.

Douglas


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Doug,

Thank-you for the spin!

steady-eddie

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Hi Ed...Thank you so much for taking this song to a higher level...Really like what you did with it

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Hi Ed
Ditto to Mimmo's comments. Really appreciate all the work you've put in. Mimmo as well for the initial collab that progressed to this version
John


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A very nice listen, Steady! Great song. Love the hook!
Terrific performances. Awesome production.
Sweet dreams,
-Tom

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Hi Ed
Good to hear that the BBC are playing the song on their regional Cumbria station.
Each regional station, BBC Manchester, Liverpool etc have a version of this show called, 'Introducing'
Its monitored at national level with the best songs getting a broadcast on BBC Radio world wide.
John

Last edited by Travis david; 11/27/20 04:55 PM.

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Mimmo/John,

Thanks for allowing me to be involved with your song foundation--I only write when I'm inspired, which isn't often with my schedule in life--twas fun and rewarding. Great news about getting the air time--thanks for update.


Tom,

Thanks for the spin, I always likewise enjoy your work.

steady-eddie

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Originally Posted by Travis david
Hi Ed
Good to hear that the BBC are playing the song on their regional Cumbria station.
Each regional station, BBC Manchester, Liverpool etc have a version of this show called, 'Introducing'
Its monitored at national level with the best songs getting a broadcast on BBC Radio world wide.
John
I will be listening...Thanks for sending it in John

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Originally Posted by E Swartz
Mimmo/John,

Thanks for allowing me to be involved with your song foundation--I only write when I'm inspired, which isn't often with my schedule in life--twas fun and rewarding. Great news about getting the air time--thanks for update.


Tom,

Thanks for the spin, I always likewise enjoy your work.

steady-eddie
Hi Ed...Thank you for taking the time to do this and giving it new life...You did a great job with it and I'm glad did. I always like new ideas for songs.
Thanks again...Its great to hear that it will be played on BBC Radio today.
Regards
Mimmo

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Wow! Great production. Sounds like you have an orchestra in the studio. Nice feelgood ending to the lyric. Well dome. all round.

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Gavin,

Thanks for the spin and kind words. It was crowded in the room which is only 14'x10'. I took a couple violin bows in the head! I'm glad you liked the ending as that was an after-thought change-up.

steady-eddie

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I think the song is lovely.

The lyrics are gentle and sweet. The music seems gentle and delicately placed around the lyrics.

My favorite aspects of it are the nuanced dynamics in the melody. It struck me that there was a lot of thoughtful interplay and changes as things moved in and out from the vocal melody lines.

Very thoughtful and lovely.

Marty

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I thought it was very well done .
I didn't like the phrasing on the second "it's always the same" as I felt it should go up as a build to the chorus.
I did think think the chorus (first line) could have hit harder as it sounded like it was going to another verse.
I wondered if you shortened it to:

Sweet dreams
Bring me sweet dreams, bring me only sweet dreams tonight
Pick me up, and carry me away to wherever, she may be

You should be proud of your work on this Ed!
Cheers to all concerned!

-Mike



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Marty,

Thanks for your thoughts and appreciate much your "props"--and yes I felt the emotion from Travis's lyrics which helps guide any singer on vocal expression--but there is certainly no one way to express song sentiment.

steady-eddie

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Hey Mike,

Thank-you for your kind words and yeah, I think what you might be hearing would work as well. The reason I sang the "always the same in a resolving" manner was I didn't feel a PC was needed with the melody as the chorus launched well by itself IMO--but more importantly, I wanted that line to evoke a little frustration or disappointment from the guy as he wakes up and his dream wasn't real again & again...........and that reality would be a heavy feeling--thus I tried to capture "that feeling" rather than build upward which is more of the norm.

I do like your idea with the chorus lines however! - That is a great idea, but not going to change production as that would involve time/money--and I'm okay with how Mimmo wrote the chorus--but a great sug!

steady-eddie

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Hi Steady Eddie,

This song sounds like the perfect ending to a great movie! The strings are amazing. After I listened to this one, I caught "There But For You I Go" which I loved, especially for the
acoustic guitar/piano contrast and then the solo electric guitar was fabulous! THEN, I listened to "Ohio River Blues". Great. Just great. Made we wanna play the backing guitar.
Sorry I diverted from this thread, but it caused me to discover some of your other work. I'll be looking for more of it.

Thanks,

Dan

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Ed
Pretty good arrangement on this.
If anything I would trim some of the lyric in the verse to smooth it out as it's a song that needs a soothing touch. 1st verse especially.
Other than that it's a good one. Maybe though it's just my way.

Vic


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Dan,

Thanks much for checking out my music! I don't post too often, but I do have a couple in the works. Enjoyed your continued progress on your song that you've been working on.

steady-eddie

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Hey Vic,

Thanks for the spin. I felt more "frustration" than "soothing" with the song's subject especially early in the song which for me contrasted the happy ending--that was my objective, and maybe the lyrics could be tweaked for sure, but I tried to accommodate the existing lyrics yet have them in culminating order. But songs "never are really finished," especially lyrically, but to take it back to production, I would need a relatively serious need to do so.

It's on my "bucket list" to make it to the UK, if I do, will surely look both you and John up! Lots I'd like to see in the "old country." I have a lot of DNA from Scotland as well.

steady-eddie


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