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#1171584 - 11/24/20 11:11 AM Iím just walking a little bit slow  
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 10,893
John Voorpostel Offline
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John Voorpostel  Offline
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 10,893
Have at er....do have music..but I expect any suggested changes adopted will not mess that up

Iím just walking a little bit slow
© John Voorpostel

Asked my old friend Louie and he said ďlet me guess,
Youíre only playing games to see what you can getĒ
So I said ďitís worth the trouble, at my age you get ideas
I speak fluent red head now, Iíve learned how to pleaseĒ

They say sometimes you stall when youíre getting a little bit old
Well Iím not down and out Iím just walking a little bit slow

Thereís a way to play the scene so you score that extra point
Like saying sheís more beautiful than Helen of Troy
Not that I knew her, Iím much younger than that
But timeís taught me women love hearing something like that

They say sometimes you stall when youíre getting a little bit old
Well Iím not down and out Iím just walking a little bit slow

Wisdom and experience
Are ageless ingredients
With every kiss I gain more than I give
It feels so right

Louieís friend Eddieís got a crazy eye
You never know where heís looking when a pretty womanís passing by
But Iíve learned to use it like a secret handshake among friends
ďcause when they start rolling, itís time to zero in

They say sometimes you stall when youíre getting a little bit old
Well Iím not down and out Iím just walking a little bit slow
They say sometimes you stall when youíre getting a little bit old
Well Iím not down and out Iím just walking a little bit slow


If writing ever becomes work I think I'm going to have to stop

iAccountant --- Info L inc --- Taxboard
#1171592 - 11/24/20 01:40 PM Re: Iím just walking a little bit slow [Re: John Voorpostel]  
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,987
Gary E. Andrews Online content
Gary E. Andrews  Online Content

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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,987
Portsmouth, Ohio, USA
It's an entertaining exposition of the Singer-Character. The Rhyme-Scheme goes awry. 'Fun' Songs can get away with that. The more philosophical Chorus seems to work too. I think I like it John.

"Iím Just Walking A Little Bit Slow
© 2020 by John Voorpostel

(I) Asked my old friend Louie and he said, ďLet me guess. (The pronoun 'I' is the 'actor' to do the 'action' of the verb 'asked')
Youíre only playing games to see what you can get.Ē
So I said, ďItís worth the trouble. At my age you get ideas. (Songwriter Laura Wood cited her Grandmother's pronunciation 'idees')
I speak fluent red head now, Iíve learned how to pleaseĒ
(I just saw a post about a red head festival in Ireland I think. Yes. https://www.google.com/search?sourc...gBAKABAaoBB2d3cy13aXo&sclient=psy-ab)

They say sometimes you stall when youíre getting a little bit old
Well Iím not down and out. Iím Just Walking A Little Bit Slow

Thereís a way to play the scene so you score that extra point
Like saying sheís more beautiful than Helen of Troy
Not that I knew her, Iím much younger than that
But timeís taught me women love hearing something like that (Determine if deleting 'But' is better.)

They say sometimes you stall when youíre getting a little bit old
Well Iím not down and out. Iím Just Walking A Little Bit Slow

Wisdom and experience
Are ageless ingredients
With every kiss I gain more than I give
It feels so right

Louieís friend Eddieís got a crazy eye
You never know where heís looking when a pretty womanís passing by
But Iíve learned to use it like a secret handshake among friends (Again, deleting 'But' might be better.)
ďcause when they start rolling, itís time to zero in
('cause' is another one to assess as not adding much to a Line, and the Line perhaps being as good or better without it.)

They say sometimes you stall when youíre getting a little bit old
Well Iím not down and out. Iím Just Walking A Little Bit Slow
They say sometimes you stall when youíre getting a little bit old
Well Iím not down and out. Iím Just Walking A Little Bit Slow


There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1171604 - 11/24/20 06:15 PM Re: Iím just walking a little bit slow [Re: John Voorpostel]  
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 586
Leanne Marchand Offline
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Leanne Marchand  Offline
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 586
Morgantown IN
Gary, thanks for the tip about the redhead festival, I'll have to check that out. And John, just what does fluent redhead sound like? lol.
Maybe my husband should learn it because when I go outside in some really dorky outfit like pajamas, coat, hat with earflaps, and rubber boots he comments sarcastically, "That's quite an outfit you're wearing," when what I want to hear is, "Darling, you look beautiful no matter what you're wearing." I love the line "cause when they start rolling, it's time to zero in." Made me laugh. Pictured Marty Feldman.

#1171633 - 11/25/20 02:13 PM Re: Iím just walking a little bit slow [Re: John Voorpostel]  
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 10,893
John Voorpostel Offline
Top 10 Poster
John Voorpostel  Offline
Top 10 Poster

Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 10,893
Good trim suggestions Gary...thank you. The "cause is definitely gone and allows the melody some room to pounce down on that "rolling"

Think I definitely need a but or and before time and before I've learned....still will see. Appreciate the look


And Leanne, a redhead yourself I gather. Truth be told I have no idea how to speak fluent redhead, but I wrote this after listening to Rikki Lee Jones. If you don't know her, she is awesome and unique and well worth discovering. In her song "Living It Up", she not only talks about Louie and his crazy eyed friend Eddie, but they both speak fluently blonde. I've played my songs for friends, and I tell them the origins of that because they have all focused in on that line.

So this is in part an homage to her. This song\lyric is completely different, but I do have to acknowledge its roots

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gI9nr2KYMJg&ab_channel=johnallore

The entire lyric is easily googled


If writing ever becomes work I think I'm going to have to stop

iAccountant --- Info L inc --- Taxboard
#1171684 - 11/26/20 03:46 PM Re: Iím just walking a little bit slow [Re: John Voorpostel]  
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 12,065
Travis david Offline
Top 10 Poster
Travis david  Offline
Top 10 Poster

Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 12,065
Kendal, Cumbria .UK
Good start a few ideas already, I'd try and drop the double "that"
To me it doesn't feel right, though presently I can't think of a substitute
saying sheís more beautiful than Helen of Troy
Not that I knew her, Iím much younger than THAT
But timeís taught me women love hearing something like THAT

I've resiited saying"
even more beautiful than Helen of Sparta
looks to kill, and I bet she's smarter ( ouch!)

As for Ricky Lee Jones, Chuckies in love?
John


Last edited by Travis david; 11/26/20 03:47 PM.

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