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#1167604 - 08/11/20 07:11 PM Mothership of Star Trek  
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 7,938
couchgrouch Online content
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couchgrouch  Online Content
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https://soundcloud.com/wabash-cannibal/robert-george-mothership-of-star-trek-demo-edit

Mothership of Star Trek

Well, my whole life felt in chaos, I was gonna miss the play-offs
When a jury summons showed up suddenly
So I skipped the evening carpool, soothed my troubles on a barstool
When this bubba sat down next to me

At first he looked so normal sippin’ on a Coors
But it turned out he’s a missionary for

The mothership of Star Trek
Where all people live as one
They’re just waitin’ for the time
When the planets will align
Then they’ll warp off past the sun
He said it ain’t no myth
Live long and prosper with
The mothership of Star Trek


He said “Buddy, stop your sulkin’, look at problems like a Vulcan
Join my church where logic conquers fear”
Well, four bourbons with no chaser, stunned me harder than a phaser
But for once my future seemed so clear

He said “it’s the beginning of a universal dawn
Come worship Shatner…find peace and wisdom on

The mothership of Star Trek
Where all people live as one
We’re just waitin’ for the time
When the planets will align
Then we’ll warp off past the sun
He said, it ain’t no myth
Live long and prosper with
The mothership of Star Trek


So I thought of space invaders, got some cool communicators
And Spock ears from a shop that had my size
Life is light and truth and beauty, I showed up for jury duty
Like I’d beamed down from the Enterprise

Saw the play-offs…didn’t hafta go to court
When I told the judge it was time to board

The mothership of Star Trek
Where all people live as one
We’re just waitin’ for the time
When the planets will align
Then we’ll warp off past the sun
Mister, it ain’t no myth
Live long and prosper with
The mothership of Star Trek


©2009 Sharyn Cassidy/Robert George


Nashville demos etc:

https://www.soundclick.com/bands3/default.cfm?bandID=431939

other demos:

https://soundcloud.com/wabash-cannibal

Amazon Kindle books by Robert George you may enjoy:

1) Americana

2) Teenage Graceland

3) The Will to Be

4) Fort Mystery

5) Wheel Sea

6) My One True Love
#1167613 - 08/12/20 12:08 AM Re: Mothership of Star Trek [Re: couchgrouch]  
Joined: May 2017
Posts: 1,511
Gavin Sinclair Online content
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Gavin Sinclair  Online Content
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Joined: May 2017
Posts: 1,511
Conover, North Carolina, USA
I really enjoyed this, Couch. Some great lines in there, especially with the internal rhymes.

He said “Buddy, stop your sulkin’, look at problems like a Vulcan

Well, four bourbons with no chaser, stunned me harder than a phaser

And Spock ears from a shop that had my size
- LOL you just know this one is going to rhyme with Enterprise and the "wait-for-it" is enjoyable.

I think what I like better about this than some of your other lyrics is that the protagonist is more sympathetic, and we can certainly sympathize with his goal!

If I have one nit, it would probably be the title/hook. I don't remember anyone in Star Trek referring to the Enterprise as the mothership. I'm not sure if that really matters, but it struck me as a little odd.

#1167621 - 08/12/20 09:38 AM Re: Mothership of Star Trek [Re: couchgrouch]  
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,831
Dave Rice (D) Offline
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Dave Rice (D)  Offline
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,831
Texas
Great co-write: We have some Cassidays a few branches up the family tree. Robert, I believe this one was written for Toby Keith... but I'm usually wrong. Your demo singer (another assumption on my part) did a great job... and I agree with Gavin... the lyric is clever and darn near perfect. Throw in the very danceable melody and its "Winner... winner... Chicken Dinner!"

My only nit (and it's almost not worth mentioning) is that many of us are interested in exactly how you two co-writers got together, how long it took, how many arguments about this phrase or that, etc. You probably won't be hanging around JPF much longer... and we'll be hearing your songs all over the place.

Congratulations to you both for making my day. ----Dave

#1167703 - 08/12/20 11:31 PM Re: Mothership of Star Trek [Re: couchgrouch]  
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 4,400
John W. Selleck Offline
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John W. Selleck  Offline
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 4,400
NJ
Very nice job by all. I'm with this small crowd though. I was wanting something more like the "Fellowship". JMHO


Have a goodun,

John W. Selleck BMI Songwriter
A day without learning is a day lost forever.

www.soundclick.com/johnsings
www.soundclick.com/johnwselleck
www.soundclick.com/johnselleck
https://www.soundclick.com/artist/default.cfm?bandID=1468958 For Selleck/Kay co-writes
#1167718 - 08/13/20 12:22 PM Re: Mothership of Star Trek [Re: couchgrouch]  
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 7,938
couchgrouch Online content
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couchgrouch  Online Content
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Posts: 7,938
Thanks, folks. smile

Dave, I'm not really in the game anymore, if I ever was. You have to be in Nashville and you have to shmooze. That takes money and a personality I don't have. I did make a successful pitch a few weeks ago. We'll see where that goes.

Gavin and John. "Mothership" itself doesn't refer to Star Trek. Mothership is a synonym for a wacky religion. There was an LA based cult a number of years ago that were awaiting a mothership to take em somewhere. The word became a minor catchphrase. Offhand, I remember it being used in a Buffy.

Fellowship wouldn't work because it's passive. There'd be no place for lines like "warp off past the sun." You want your lyric to be alive and not just lie there like it's dead.


Nashville demos etc:

https://www.soundclick.com/bands3/default.cfm?bandID=431939

other demos:

https://soundcloud.com/wabash-cannibal

Amazon Kindle books by Robert George you may enjoy:

1) Americana

2) Teenage Graceland

3) The Will to Be

4) Fort Mystery

5) Wheel Sea

6) My One True Love
#1167728 - 08/13/20 01:18 PM Re: Mothership of Star Trek [Re: couchgrouch]  
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,831
Dave Rice (D) Offline
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Dave Rice (D)  Offline
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,831
Texas
Hi "Couch:"

My point was... you really could be "in the game" without living in Nashville. I've lived there, worked there and learned that you need to know somebody to get you past the "gatekeepers." That requires personal relationships... even those established during conversation "on-line" such as this. Your choice, my friend.

All the best, ----Dave

#1167802 - 08/14/20 11:41 AM Re: Mothership of Star Trek [Re: couchgrouch]  
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 7,938
couchgrouch Online content
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couchgrouch  Online Content
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Posts: 7,938
It's very hard to become part of the Music Row scene without being there. I made some good contacts years ago on the strength of what I posted on the internet. My best contact has retired, the others are still pitching my older tunes, as far as I know. Marc and I disagree on the quality of material coming out of Nashville (or at least I'm willing to declare the obvious...it's awful), but we agree that artists want to co-write. And they're not gonna co-write with people they don't know. I don't blame them for that, it's natural.

I still have people who regularly ask me for hooks and lyrics, which they then use as a basis for cowrites with artists.

But me? I'm never gonna be going out for drinks with honchos from Curb at that awesome pub by the roundabout.

Plus, there's this:

Wolf Blitzer just interviewed Paul Reubens. Reubens is outraged that Biden is now recommending a Federal mandate that masks be worn during auto-erotic activities.


Guys that post political lampoons like that on FB are radioactive to artists in fear of cancel culture. Me? I don't give a damn.


Ps...I think I met Sharyn on a site a number of years ago. Maybe Song U. I wasn't a member but Cameron was. As I recall, Cam and I had some songs that did well in contests. Sharyn and I wrote several songs that also did well. (Fade to Blonde is being pitched). I met Craig Bickhardt through her. He was a reviewer for Song U and he liked one of our tunes. As I recall...it's been years. Craig and I wrote some songs, too. He's the real deal.

Last edited by couchgrouch; 08/14/20 01:19 PM.

Nashville demos etc:

https://www.soundclick.com/bands3/default.cfm?bandID=431939

other demos:

https://soundcloud.com/wabash-cannibal

Amazon Kindle books by Robert George you may enjoy:

1) Americana

2) Teenage Graceland

3) The Will to Be

4) Fort Mystery

5) Wheel Sea

6) My One True Love
#1167810 - 08/14/20 01:49 PM Re: Mothership of Star Trek [Re: couchgrouch]  
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 3,630
E Swartz Offline
E Swartz  Offline

Top 100 Poster

Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 3,630
Ohio
Couch,

As usual, great writing/composing and production.

steady-eddie

#1167815 - 08/14/20 03:06 PM Re: Mothership of Star Trek [Re: E Swartz]  
Joined: Oct 2019
Posts: 165
PaulCanuck Offline
Serious Contributor
PaulCanuck  Offline
Serious Contributor

Joined: Oct 2019
Posts: 165
Nice collab guys - sounds radio-ready to me.
Only nit is the lyrics come at you like a firehose in the verses.
Don't know what to recommend though - you don't want the tempo any slower for the song.

Fun track smile
Paul

#1167846 - 08/15/20 02:37 AM Re: Mothership of Star Trek [Re: couchgrouch]  
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 51
kevinism Offline
Serious Contributor
kevinism  Offline
Serious Contributor

Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 51
Dublin, Ireland
Love the clever lyrics and the chorus is really catchy. Also, nice bridge and key change, great stuff! Kevin

#1167855 - 08/15/20 08:10 AM Re: Mothership of Star Trek [Re: couchgrouch]  
Joined: May 2020
Posts: 123
Songbird52 Offline
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Songbird52  Offline
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Joined: May 2020
Posts: 123
Haha, love it. I actually know a lot of people who think that way!

Oh what a great ending.

Last edited by Songbird52; 08/15/20 08:11 AM.
#1167951 - 08/17/20 11:02 AM Re: Mothership of Star Trek [Re: couchgrouch]  
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 7,938
couchgrouch Online content
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couchgrouch  Online Content
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 7,938
Thanks folks.

Last edited by couchgrouch; 08/17/20 11:03 AM.

Nashville demos etc:

https://www.soundclick.com/bands3/default.cfm?bandID=431939

other demos:

https://soundcloud.com/wabash-cannibal

Amazon Kindle books by Robert George you may enjoy:

1) Americana

2) Teenage Graceland

3) The Will to Be

4) Fort Mystery

5) Wheel Sea

6) My One True Love

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