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#1162872 - 04/08/20 03:15 PM SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS/ESSAYS BY GARY E. ANDREWS *****  
Joined: Dec 2006
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Gary E. Andrews Offline
Gary E. Andrews  Offline

Top 200 Poster

Joined: Dec 2006
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Portsmouth, Ohio, USA
Down the page are Songs, Lyrics, and Essays:

PAGE 2: (Reverse Order Timeline)

August 2, 2020: Adding an Essay: "Enough", "Not Enough", "Too Much."

July 11, 2020: Adding: "All The Way To Texas".

July 6, 2020: Adding: "In A Funny Way". It's a Song 'fabrication', a 'crafting' more than an inspiration. But I thought the first two Lines had 'merit' so I tried to write it.

June 11, 2020: Essay: A Song Is A 'Communication'.

May 31, 2020: Adding "Your Very Thin Line" which I just stumbled across while cleaning (LOL) I mean...moving s--t around. I wrote it in 2009. It crossed my mind a few days ago. I remembered the Singer-Character standing outside that door in the Chelsea Hotel. I couldn't remember it, long, poetic as much as Lyrical. Damned fool that I am I forgot to write down the chord progression I sang it to.

May 24, 2020: I'm adding "One Kind O' Blues" down on Page 2. Based on a quote from Son House, it's a blues working through a typical I7, IV7, V7 progression. I tried various 1-4-5-7's, E7 - A7 - B7, G7 - C7 - D7, and each one has its nuances of how it works with the Lyric. No audio link.

May 19, 2020: I added recommendations for Song Analysis, dissecting Songs you like, or don't like, to see if you can determine why you do or don't. It's an exercise to learn about it, not something you have to formally do the rest of your life. I think it helped me comprehend Songwriting Structure, lessons about the Human attention span, and the 'Hook Factor' in components of Songs.

PAGE 1: (Reverse Order Timeline)

May 14, 2020: What stimulates your creative juices? (Someone asked.)

May 9, 2020: I'm adding a new Lyric down the pages of the SHOWCASE, at the end, something I wrote just now,
"She Ain't No Angel (She's The Next Best Thing)" No audio link.

May 9, 2020: The male Point-Of-View: "He Ain't No Angel".

April 25, 2020: "Madeline", an old Song of mine. No audio link.

April 25, 2020: "Quit Me (Say Goodbye)". No audio link.

April 15, 2020: "Love Lives (Inside A Bubble)". Just a Lyric.

April 8, 2020: Links to other Songs posted here on JPF, some that can be heard at garyeandrews.com.

April 8, 2020: "Getaway". No audio link.

April 8, 2020: "Leave Me". No audio link.






Last edited by Gary E. Andrews; 08/02/20 02:22 AM.

There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1162874 - 04/08/20 03:21 PM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
Joined: Dec 2006
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Gary E. Andrews Offline
Gary E. Andrews  Offline

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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,789
Portsmouth, Ohio, USA
Watching old video tapes of the old early 1900's blues men. Heard "Leave me" and thought it was a unique angle, as opposed to the usual, 'DON'T leave me' theme.

"Leave Me" copyright April 2, 2020 by Gary E. Andrews
(Chorus)
Leave Me! You don't have to sta-a-ay!
Leave Me! Get out of my wa-a-ay!
Go on and Leave Me!
You never loved me, anyway!

(Verse I)
You spent all my money!
You wasted all my time!
You just think it's funny!
I think it's a crime!

Leave Me! You don't have to sta-a-ay!
Leave Me! Get out of my wa-a-ay!
Go on and Leave Me!
You never loved me, anyway!

(Verse II)
You ran off with my best friend!
You drove off with my car!
You've been gone thirty days!
Who knows where you are?

Leave Me! You don't have to sta-a-ay!
Leave Me! Get out of my wa-a-ay!
Go on and Leave Me!
You never loved me, anyway!

(Verse III)
They fount my car in Memphis,
jacked up on the street,
caught yo' pretty ass walkin',
in yo' stocking feet! Ha! Ha!

Leave Me! You don't have to sta-a-ay!
Leave Me! Get out of my wa-a-ay!
Go on and Leave Me!
You never loved me, anyway!

(Verse IV)
Who's that scratchin' at my door?
You kids get off my porch!
Ooo! It's you baby,
Lookin' hot enough to scorch!

(Coda)
Leave Me! Stop it! Stop it!
You don't have to sta-a-ay!
Leave Me! Quit! Quit ya fool!
Get out of my wa-a-ay!
Go on and Leave Me!
You never loved me, anyway!

(This is the kind of Song you could write a lot of Verses to and then pick the ones you think are best.)


There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1162875 - 04/08/20 03:23 PM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,789
Gary E. Andrews Offline
Gary E. Andrews  Offline

Top 200 Poster

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,789
Portsmouth, Ohio, USA
I remembered this one a while back and tried to play it but couldn't remember all the details of the storyline.

Forty years ago I hit on some interesting chords, got some interesting Lyrical images, and let the players take the stage.
I think the guy left the girl the same day the girl left the guy, without actually telling each other, and he found her on the road.
This one must run very long, Singer/Songwriter stuff. An Eagles vibe. It's a Refrain-Type Chorus, as opposed to a Stanza-Type, which necessitates a Bridge to break the Repetition with Change, to keep me interested. It has two Bridges. A Double-Bridge? lol One to get over and one to get back I guess. And it Repeats the Bridge. Strange Structure, but works for me.
No recording. But I thought you might enjoy the Lyric. I do.

"Getaway"
Out Of The Woodwork
1979 by Gary E. Andrews
All Rights Reserved for the Globe

Chords:
D XXO232
F#7 242252
G 355433 barre
Em O22OOO
Em7 O22O3O
Gm7 XX3333 ? I think.
A XO222O
Bm XX4432
F# X44322

Verse I
The mornin' broke,
And the first rays of dawn,
Took the night away,
And painted the blue,
Such a mystical hue, Of red.
The D. J. spoke, On the radio,
And took me back a ways,
Before the dawn,
When a realization laid its hand,
Upon my head.
Today's the day,

Chorus Refrain
I just gotta' make, my Getaway.

Verse II
The night had been warm,
The wind blowin' in,
And across my face,
Carried the scent,
The familiar mint,
Of the desert rose.
I saw the sign,
Of the county line.
It was back a ways,
Before the night had changed, yeah,
Into a day,
When I just to make, My Getaway.

(Bridge)
She said, "It would be so easy to be lovers."
I told her it had been hard, To find a friend.
She said, "We could be so good, For each other."
Who'd have ever thought, Such a love could begin,
And then end, In a day when I'd just have to make my Getaway?

Verse III
The white lines went by.
The wind made a move,
In the distant pines,
Goin' up the slope,
A whisper of hope,
Crossed my mind.
A blue-jeaned girl,
From the desert world.
She was hitchin' a ride.
I picked her up and it started to rain, yeah!

(Bridge)
She told me a story, Sad, and full of pain,
About a man that she once loved,
But she could not speak his name.

He said, "It would be so easy to be lovers."
She told him it had been hard, To find a friend.
She said, "We could be so good, For each other."
Who'd have ever thought, Such a love could begin,
And then end, In a day when I'd just have to make my Getaway?

Verse IV
I told her my story.
She said, "I feel sorry for you."
She poured me a double,
And rolled up a couple from her bag.
She said, "Pull on over.
Turn off the motor.
I'll show you a thing or two, yeah!

She said, "It would be so easy to be lovers."
I told her it had been hard, To find a friend.
She said, "We could be so good, For each other."
Who'd have ever thought, Such a love could begin,
It'll never end, In a day when we'll just have to make our Getaway. In a day...


There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1162876 - 04/08/20 03:24 PM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,789
Gary E. Andrews Offline
Gary E. Andrews  Offline

Top 200 Poster

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,789
Portsmouth, Ohio, USA

Last edited by Gary E. Andrews; 04/08/20 06:23 PM.

There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1163211 - 04/15/20 09:06 AM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,789
Gary E. Andrews Offline
Gary E. Andrews  Offline

Top 200 Poster

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,789
Portsmouth, Ohio, USA
Fabricating a Lyric, as opposed to working with a guitar and finding a Lyric in inspired prosody with the music.

"Love Lives (Inside A Bubble)" copyright April 14, 2020 by Gary E. Andrews.

(Verse I)
You're so close,
but I can't touch you!
So close,
so far away.
I know,
that I can't love you!
It's too soon,
to feel that way!

(Chorus)
Love Lives, beside the trouble!
It won't get in our way!
Love Lives, Inside A Bubble!
Time can't take love away!
Love Lives! Love Lives!

(Verse II)
The wind blows.
The bubble moves me!
Love flows!
Absence aches.
I know
that you can't love me.
Not until
the bubble breaks!

Love Lives, beside the trouble!
It won't get in our way!
Love Lives, Inside A Bubble!
Time can't take love away!
Love Lives! Love Lives!

(Bridge)
We'll wait while the world does its worst!
We'll wait until the bubble bursts!

Love Lives, beside the trouble!
It won't get in our way!
Love Lives, Inside A Bubble!
Time can't take love away!
(Coda)
Love Lives! Love Lives!

Last edited by Gary E. Andrews; 04/15/20 09:10 AM.

There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1163654 - 04/24/20 08:45 PM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
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Gary E. Andrews Offline
Gary E. Andrews  Offline

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Portsmouth, Ohio, USA
"Quit Me! (Say Goodbye)" copyright April 4, 2020 by Gary E. Andrews. Dm Am G G7 A7 #Blues.

(Verse I)
Is it that e-e-asy, for you to Quit Me?
I'd like to think, it would be harder.
The gift you gave me, you didn't get me.
You traded love, more like barter.

(Chorus)
: Is it that e-e-asy, for you to go?
Is it that e-e-asy, for you to fly?
If it's that e-e-asy, for you to Quit Me,
go on and Quit Me!
Do it quickly!
Say Goodbye.

(Verse II)
Was it that har-r-ard, for you to love me?
I'd like to think, I made it easy.
The bus came by. That's when you shoved me!
You make me feel, a little queasy! :

Is it that e-e-asy, for you to laugh?
Is it that e-e-asy, for you to cry?
If it's that e-e-asy, for you to Quit Me,
go on and Quit Me!
Do it quickly!
Say Goodbye.

(Instrumental Bridge)

(Repeat Verse I)
Is it that e-e-asy, for you to Quit Me?
I'd like to think, it would be harder.
The gift you gave me, you didn't get me.
You traded love, more like barter.
(Pre-Chorus 'lift')
: Is it that e-e-asy, for you to go?
Is it that e-e-asy, for you to fly?
If it's that e-e-asy, for you to Quit Me,
go on and Quit Me!
Do it quickly!
Say Goodbye.
(Coda)
If it's that e-e-asy, for you to Quit Me,
go on and Quit Me!
Do it quickly!
Say Goodbye.
Say Goodbye.
Say Goodbye.


There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1163655 - 04/24/20 08:45 PM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
Joined: Dec 2006
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Gary E. Andrews Offline
Gary E. Andrews  Offline

Top 200 Poster

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,789
Portsmouth, Ohio, USA
Madeline
Out Of The Woodwork II
1978 by Gary E. Andrews
All Rights Reserved for the Globe

Chords:
Amaj7 ? X7765O
E O221OO
Bm XX4432

(Verse I)
Madeline, Won't ya' give us a smile?
Madeline, Won't ya' wait for a while,
And see what the postman brings?
He may bring you a diamond ring,
In a letter from a lover who aint' so far away.
O.K.

(V II)
Madeline, Won't ya' sing us a song?
Madeline, No it won't take long,
To see what the morrow brings.
It may bring you a song to sing,
In a meadow where the wind
in the green grass sings along.
Sing this song.

(Bridge)
Sing :Really! Really I'm trying.
Really! Really Lord I'm dying to know.
Is it something that I lack?
Is it gone and not comin' back?
Did it only come to leave its track on my soul?
Oh no-oo-wo-o-ah. La-da-duh-da-da-duh-da.

(V III)
Madeline, Have I said something wrong?
Madeline, Are the good times gone,
To see where the sadness is?
Did he take your love and make it his?
And did he slip away with a stolen kiss
At the crack of dawn?
Well stop me if I'm wrong.

(Coda)
Is it something that I said,
That came out wrong and hurt your head?
Did I take away your hope
And leave a great big hole?
Well sing for your soul.

Sing :Really! Really I'm trying.
Really! Really Lord I'm dying to know.
Is it something that I lack?
Is it gone and not comin' back?
Did it only come to leave its track on my soul?
Oh no-oo--o.
Is it something that I lack?
Is it gone and not comin' back?
Did it only come to leave its track on my soul?
Oh no-o. Oh no-o.

More Info...
"Madeline" Copyright 1978 by Gary E. Andrews
All Rights Reserved For The Globe

Different guitar treatment, inspired a different kind of lyric.

Last edited by Gary E. Andrews; 04/24/20 08:48 PM.

There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1164168 - 05/09/20 06:32 PM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
Joined: Dec 2006
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Gary E. Andrews Offline
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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,789
Portsmouth, Ohio, USA
"She Ain't No Angel (She's The Next Best Thing)"
(Alternative title: "She May Not Be An Angel")
copyright May 9, 2020 by Gary E. Andrews.
Chords:
C/G 332O1O
C7 X323O1O
F X33211
G7 32OOO1

She's got an edge about her,
if you rub her the wrong way. (Alternative Line: If I rub her the wrong way)
You should never doubt her, (I don't ever doubt her)
when she says what she'll say.
Leave her when she's quiet! (I leave her...)
Give her time to think! (I give her...)
She Ain't No Angel, (She May Not Be An Angel)
but She's The Next Best Thing.

Wake her in the mornin', (I wake...)
with a gentle nudge.
Leave her if she mumbles. (I leave...)
She ain't gonna budge!
Go fix her a breakfast. (I go...)
Give her her first drink. (and something good/warm to drink)
She Ain't No Angel!
She's The Next Best Thing.

She gave you days of sunshine, (She gave me...)
long nights with the Moon.
She helped you write the best lines, (She helped me...)
in your favorite tunes. (In my...)
She says more with a smile,
and her funny wink.
She Ain't No Angel, (She May Not Be An Angel)
She Ain't No Angel,
She Ain't No Angel.
She's The Next Best Thing.

#CountryTwang #OldeCountry #LoveSong

Last edited by Gary E. Andrews; 05/10/20 04:12 PM.

There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1164169 - 05/09/20 06:35 PM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,789
Gary E. Andrews Offline
Gary E. Andrews  Offline

Top 200 Poster

Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,789
Portsmouth, Ohio, USA
This was a post praising nurses, as the next best thing to an angel.
I'm tinkering with the Lyric this morning. Here's a rewrite from the female Point-Of-View.
And I wondered if the Singer-Character should be less philosophical, telling others what 'you' should and shouldn't do, and 'own' it, First-Person with 'I' and 'me'.
I'm just exploring some options to see if something is more effective in hooking listener interest.
The "May Not" alternative Line seems to work except at the Coda, where the 'He Ain't No Angel" seems to work for simplicity's sake.
I'm just exploring possibilities. I'm wondering if others do this sort of rewrite, Female POV, edits, tweaks.

"He May Not Be An Angel (He's The Next Best Thing)"
copyright May 9, 2020 by Gary E. Andrews.
Chords:
C/G 332O1O
C7 X323O1O
F X33211
G7 32OOO1

He's got an edge about him,
if you rub him the wrong way. (If I...)
I don't ever doubt him,
when he says what he'll say.
I leave him when he's quiet!
I give him time to think!
He May Not Be An Angel,
but he's The Next Best Thing.

I wake him in the mornin',
with a gentle nudge.
I leave him if he mumbles.
He ain't gonna budge!
Go fix him a breakfast. (I go..)
Give him his first drink. (and somethin' good/warm to drink)
He May Not Be An Angel!
He's The Next Best Thing.

He gave me days of sunshine, (More immediate, happening now, "He gives me...")
long nights with the Moon.
He helped me write the best lines, (He 'helps')
in my favorite tunes.
He says more with a smile,
and his funny wink.
He May Not Be An Angel,
He May Not Be An Angel,
He May Not Be An Angel.
He's The Next Best Thing.

This is 'Fabrication Songwriting', finding Lines with deliberation, as opposed to stream-of-consciousness 'inspiration' of Lines that tumble out and I make judgments afterward. Much of my editing and rewrite takes place in real time, redoing Lines to find the right way to say what I've stumbled on, and the Melodic prosody, with guitar in hand. Now I'm stuck working through those chords, trying to do the 'fit', the 'marriage' of Lyric with Melody to fit the guitar work.

Last edited by Gary E. Andrews; 05/10/20 04:21 PM.

There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1164411 - 05/14/20 03:45 PM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
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Someone asked what stimulates my 'creative juices'.

Inspiration is probably a manifestation of boredom, seeking to find pleasure in the fantasy of Songwriting.
I'm mainly focused on Lyric-writing. My guitar playing simply accommodates the poet who sings his poetry instead of simply writing it or even reciting it. I enjoy my Lyrics. I think I get something satisfying done. Some rise to the point of being literary, literally well-constructed stories with their beginning, middle and end. Some simply have satisfying Rhythm and Rhyme, Lines that I feel build a coherent theme.
Satisfaction is in the mind of the seeker thereafter, of course.

I had the epiphany that you, as a Songwriter, are the first listener. You should be 'hooked' by the Hook Factor in what you hear, just as you hope any other 'consumer' will be. Your critical ear should be 'satisfied' with that Introductory Movement. Its Hook Factor 'hooked' your interest, serving that function, only going on long enough to do that, unless it is extraordinary. (People always cite, "Stairway To Heaven" and "Hotel California", with long Intros, and being long Songs.)I reply, "Yeah! Write a Song like that. You can go on as long as they do if you write a Song like that!"

Hey! That Introductory Movement is probably where my creative juices...I call it Creative Flow...start. I get a couple chords going on guitar, the Rhythm hooks me, the first listener, the infinite Melodic possibilities traversing between two or three chords come into play, and soon a Line of Lyric comes out of my mouth.
The Line of Lyric hooks me. I want to know what the Singer-Character is on about. What he's said in the Verse I Line 1 had some nugget of Hook Factor, the word meaning, the implication of a story I might like to 'hear', to 'know', and...strategically, I think, a sense of the Singer-Character. It's not me. It's a fiction. But he could be interesting. I know me. He's not going to be nasty and have to call Janet Miss Jackson. He's not going to bore me with mundane details and take me nowhere. I've met 147 of him and they almost all took me somewhere I liked going, and got to be more consistently satisfying...there's that word again...as the years went by.

The Singer-Character may not come fully realized. Sometimes I write a few Lines and don't have a full sense of him yet. It's his story but I don't know him well enough to tell it. He incubates. Rhyme often takes me a little deeper into his psyche. To get to that Rhyme I had to have a coherent Line of thought, of conversation. He can't just...doesn't just grab a Rhyme...Grab-A-Rhyme... "insane", "realize", "What can I say?", he said something in Verse I Line 2 that advanced the story...his story...made sense in the context of the idea in Line 1 that hooked my interest to start with.

"Put on a hat! Take off your coat! Babe, let's you and I rent a boat! I'll row us, to the Kentucky si-hi-a-hide!"
("Over The River Tonight, copyright 1979 by Gary E. Andrews.)

I'm hooked. He's talking to someone, thereby introducing a Love-Interest Character.
Suddenly it's interesting! Love makes the world go 'round! And suddenly, suddenly there's a world where there are a hat, a coat, a Babe, and a boat, going 'round!
I...the first listener...want to know more. I want to hear his story. And as the first listener, the Songwriter, it's up to me to find it, to tell it, to let the Singer-Character tell it, to get on his vibe, to get to know him so I can let him tell it.
I don't want to force it. I can force it. I can fabricate and Rhyme and make stuff up. But it's always better if I give him time to materialize, to let him incubate and become more fully formed as a Character, a reality I can imagine.
And, imagining, I can 'suspend disbelief'.
Someone said it that way. You begin to believe in the story in the Song, the story in the book, the story in the movie, suspending the disbelief that it is real, and believing in it as real. The dinosaurs aren't hoaky. They're real. Or realistic. The love isn't fake. These people really mean what they're saying. (Demi Moore and Rob Lowe in "About Last Night".)

That's where the creative juices begin to flow, where I attune to the Creative Flow, in that suspension of disbelief, because that's what I'm looking for when that first Line comes out of my mouth. I'm looking for a story I...the first listener...want to hear. I've learned to look for it. I've been here before. I heard good stories here before and I expect to hear another good one.

Last edited by Gary E. Andrews; 05/19/20 10:36 PM.

There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1164538 - 05/19/20 10:44 PM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
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Studying Songs you like, and Songs you don't like, can help you develop your sense of 'right' and 'wrong' in your own Songwriting.
I suggest picking a Song and doing some analysis. This is just an exercise. You could complete it in a sitting or two or three.
If you like what you learn with one Song, pick another one. You may learn as much or more from a Song you don't like as one you do like.
I'm rattling off some things to analyze here. I may refine it over time. You may not have to be so formal, so in depth. Be as meticulous or as casual as you like. But be analytical enough to see if you can determine what it is they did right to make you like the Song, or wrong to make you not like it.

I suggest analysis of 'Timing':
How long is the Introductory Movement?
How long is the Verse (or Chorus if the Song opens with the Chorus)?
How long does it take to get the Chorus (or Verse, whatever Stanza comes second)?
How long is that second Stanza?
By the end of that second Stanza is THE Hook, the title, clearly obvious?
How many times have they sung that title Line?
What is the overall length of the Song?

I suggest analysis of Lyrical content:
Does the Lyrical content of the first and second Stanzas make sense?
Are the Lines coherent thoughts?
Are the Lines delivered in conversational style?
Are the Lines communicated, 'sent' clearly enunciated so you can 'receive' them, ideally on first listening?
Does THE Hook/title seem to sum up what all the rest of the Lyric seems to be getting at?
Can you spot any Lines that simply seem to Rhyme, without adding much to the storyline?
Are there any 'tangled' Lines, twisted syntax in a way not natural to the way you would say them, perhaps designed to land on a Rhyme-Word?
Mostly analysis can be confined to how you 'hear' the delivery. If looking at a written Lyric do you see any spelling errors, misconstrued words, which might interrupt the flow of 'consumption' as a reader stops to re-read those errors to see what the Lyricist meant to say instead of what they did say?
Does their Rhyme-Scheme seem consistent, Verse to Verse, Rhyming the same Lines in each Verse, Lines one and two, three and four, or one and three, two and four?
Is there Internal Rhyme?
Is there Nursery-Rhyme style, where two Lines might Rhyme and a third Line be left Un-Rhymed, then two more Lines Rhymed, and the Un-Rhymed third Line picked up with Rhyme in Line six?
Are there Hard-Rhymes, Imperfect- or Soft-Rhymes?
Is there no Rhyme?
Did the Lyric 'move' you in some way, emotionally, intellectually?

I suggest analyzing Structure, the components of the composition:
Can you clearly hear where each Stanza begins and ends?
Can you lay out the Structure, Verse I, Chorus, Verse II, Chorus, Verse III, Chorus, Coda?
Or Verse, Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Bridge, Chorus, Coda?
Did they have a Verse III, or resort to a an Instrumental Bridge, or Lyrical Bridge, and go to a final giving of the Chorus?
Any Structure that works, works.

I suggest analysis of Arrangement, the musical accompaniment to the vocal:
Do instruments fill some or all the gaps between Lyrical Lines?
Do instruments 'step on' the vocalizations, obscuring the word delivery, playing while the singer is singing?
Is the vocal buried in the mix, the music overwhelming the 'featured' vocal?
Do the Lyrical ideas and musical style seem to match, sad ideas with melancholy music, happy ideas with upbeat music?
Is the vocalist's voice unique in some way, raspy, urgent sounding, emotional, angry, humorous?

This 'analytical' practice isn't the way we usually listen to music, as fans. It is a 'study' exercise, to educate yourself to make your own judgment calls, as the First Listener to your own Songs. What the Songs you study do right, or wrong, in your opinion, can help you do things right in your own Songs, and avoid doing things wrong.


There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1164600 - 05/24/20 11:39 AM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
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"One Kind 'O Blues" Copyright May 19, 2020 by Gary E. Andrews.
G7 320001
C7 032310
D7 xx0212

(Verse I)

They ain't but One Kind O' Blues, and baby I got 'em!
They ain't but One Kind O' Blues, and baby I got 'em!'

I cain't get over you! Ain't nothin' I can do! I got 'em!
They ain't but One Kind O' Blues, and baby I got 'em!

(Verse II)

Ain't but one thing to do, and that's to get out!
Ain't but one thing to do, and that's to get out!
This is a one-way road, runnin' high down to low!
I gotta get out!
They ain't but One Kind O' Blues, and baby I got 'em!

(Bridge)

I'm out on the street, lookin' down at my feet! I'm walkin'!
Ain't no one here but me, so there ain't no need, for talkin'!
They ain't but One Kind O' Blues, One Kind O' Blues, and baby I got 'em!

(Verse III)

It's a terrible pain, Ooo! Oh! Baby I'm hurtin'!
It's a terrible pain! Ooo! Oh! Baby I'm hurtin'!
Ain't nothin' but rain clouds! No need to look out! I close the curtain!
They ain't but One Kind O' Blues, One Kind O' Blues, and baby I got 'em!
(Coda)
They ain't but One Kind O' Blues, One Kind O' Blues, and baby I got 'em!
They ain't but One Kind O' Blues, One Kind O' Blues, and baby I got 'em!


There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1164878 - 05/31/20 03:25 PM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
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"Your Very Thin Line" copyright 2009 by Gary E. Andrews, All Rights Reserved.

(Verse I)
I stare at your door in the Chelsea Hotel.
It's seen more than its share.
I study the floor, as I ring your doorbell,
wondering who else has been there.
I'm aware your business, is now none of mine.
I'm a visitor to another place and time.
Will I cross your threshold, or hang in your hall,
with writing on the wall, no evidence at all?
I wonder! I ponder! I try to divine,
what is on your mind.
Where to be...Where to be,
as I wait by Your Very Thin Line.

(Verse II)
You open on up. You usher me on in.
You give me a half-hearted hug.
I stand hat in hand, for your papers to sign,
admire my old Persian rug.
I'm a wayfaring stranger, in your stranger land,
trying to get back to, the home I left again.
You've got what I came for. Now I'm back out your door,
in the streets of New York. I'm no longer sore.
I wonder! I ponder! I try to divine,
the nature of my crime,
as I sign on Your Very Thin Line.

(Bridge)
There's a thin line between, what you say and what you mean,
and what you say you meant, "Last time!".
The disdain in your eyes, wipes away your smile,
leaves your mouth a Very Thin Line.

(Verse III)
Later that night at the Hollywood Bar, I'm waiting for a young friend of mine,
I hear your laugh, look and there you are,
having a hell of a time.
I slip out the back door, up the alley to the street,
just in time to intercept my friend.
I kiss her puzzled face. She says, "What a place to meet!"
I wonder! I ponder! I try to divine,
what pleasures we find,
on our side of Your Very Thin Line.
Our side of Your Very Thin Line.

(It's ragged. Rhyme goes all to hell. I may tinker, tailor, 'craft' my inspiration; or, I may leave well enough alone.)
(I tinkered. Still having trouble letting 'Where to be...Where to be...' go now that I've envisioned the video where he's at the door to ring the bell, then across the hall, away from the door, back to the wall, then a third shot in the middle of the hall. I thought to put 'What to do...What to do' in VII. Now thinking Rubato, that irregularity can work. It's a Singer-Songwriter style, which enables more Poetic License. Besides, by Repeating the pattern in VII it might call for a third Repeat in VIII, and that seems excessive. Ah well, such is tinkering.)


"Your Very Thin Line" copyright 2009 by Gary E. Andrews, All Rights Reserved.

(Verse I)
I stare at your door in the Chelsea Hotel.
It's seen more than its share.
I study the floor, as I ring your doorbell,
wondering who else has walked there.
I'm aware your business, is now none of mine.
I'm a visitor to another place and time.
Will I cross your threshold, or hang here in your hall,
writing on the wall, no evidence at all?
I wonder! I ponder! I try to divine,
as I wait by Your Very Thin Line.

(Verse II)
You open on up. You usher me on in.
You give me a half-hearted hug.
I stand hat in hand, for your papers to sign,
admire my old Persian rug.
I'm a wayfaring stranger, in your stranger land,
trying to get back to, the home I left again.
You get what I came for. Now I'm back out your door,
in the streets of New York. I'm no longer sore.
I wonder! I ponder! I try to divine,
as I sign on Your Very Thin Line.

(Bridge)
There's a thin line between, what you say and what you mean,
and what you say you meant, "Last time!".
The disdain in your eyes, quite belies your smile,
leaves your mouth a Very Thin Line.

(Verse III)
Later that night at the Hollywood Bar,
I'm waiting for a young friend of mine,
I hear your laugh, look and there you are,
having a hell of a time.
I slip out the back door, up the alley to the street,
just in time to intercept my friend.
I kiss her puzzled face. She says, "What a place to meet!
I guess there's been a change of plans!"
I wonder! I ponder! I try to divine,
on our side of Your Very Thin Line.
Our side of Your Very Thin Line.

(Whittling down to get a more singable Song, with a shorter timespan.)

"Your Very Thin Line" copyright 2009 by Gary E. Andrews, All Rights Reserved.

(Verse I)
I stare at your door in the Chelsea Hotel.
It's seen more than its share.
I study the floor, as I ring your doorbell,
wondering who else has walked there.
I'm aware your business, is now none of mine.
I'm a visitor to another place and time.
I wonder! I ponder! I try to divine,
as I wait by Your Very Thin Line.

(Verse II)
You open on up. You usher me on in.
You give me a half-hearted hug.
I stand hat in hand, for your papers to sign,
admire my old Persian rug.
I'm a wayfaring stranger, in your stranger land,
trying to get back to, the home I left again.
I wonder! I ponder! I try to divine,
as I sign on Your Very Thin Line.

(Bridge)
There's a thin line between, what you say and what you mean,
and what you say you meant, "Last time!".
The disdain in your eyes, quite belies your smile,
leaves your mouth a Very Thin Line.

(Verse III)
Later that night at the Hollywood Bar,
I'm waiting for a young friend of mine,
I hear your laugh, look and there you are,
having a hell of a time.
I slip out the back door, up the alley to the street,
just in time to intercept my friend.
I kiss her puzzled face. She says, "What a place to meet!"
I say, "There's been a change of plans!"
I wonder! I ponder! I try to divine,
on our side of Your Very Thin Line.
Our side of Your Very Thin Line.


Last edited by Gary E. Andrews; 06/06/20 05:05 PM.

There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1165288 - 06/11/20 10:53 PM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
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A Song Is A 'Communication'.
Even an instrumental composition attempts to 'communicate' the 'feel' or 'emotion' implied in the music.
A Lyric is comprised of words with meanings, so the Singer 'sends' those words.
To fully qualify as a 'communication' the words have to be 'received'.

That Latin prefix, 'com', means 'with', implying the 'sender' and the 'receiver'. We communicate 'with' one another.

If the words are 'sent' but not 'received' the 'sender' didn't 'communicate with' the intended 'receiver'.

The Lyric has to be intelligible, not too obscure, although obscurity can work to some degree. Obscurity in poetry differs in that the reader can re-read. A Lyric has to communicate the first time, as heard.

The Lyric has to be enunciated, so the word meaning is not sacrificed to the Note execution.
A voice has to take on the characteristics you would find in an instrument executing Notes but retaining the characteristics of a Human voice 'communicating' word meanings.

If the Singer fails to 'send' to effectively communicate a single word the 'receiver' may assume what the word is by the context, and by the Rhyme if it is a Rhyme-Word. If not, missing that word, or a couple words, may keep the Line from communicating.
Failure of a Line to communicate may keep the Stanza (Verse or Chorus, e.g.) from communicating.
Soon the whole Song may fail to communicate because of the 'values' of those missed words.

Listeners can focus their attention, study a little harder, 'listen up', pay attention, replay, but ideally, you want to 'send' so they have no option but to 'receive', and receive the first time they hear it.
Your product has Hook Factor, something that hooked you, The First Listener, and should hook other listeners, and keep them hooked as you 'communicate' your Lyric. If you lose them at any point, especially early in the Song, you may not get them back.

I suspect Bob Dylan's enunciation, a subject of like/dislike discussion for many years, is a product of his listening to the playback and realizing some words weren't being received, and so he re-cut the recordings and sent those words more deliberately.

It may be difficult for a singer to evaluate the 'sending' qualities. They KNOW the words.

I suspect sometimes it is a matter of a singer sustaining a note until it 'slides' into the next note, something an instrument might do, and even spoken might have that effect. But each word must be given its space, and not 'sounded' in a manner too different from how it would be spoken.

Note Dolly Parton's classic, "I Will Always Love You". That title Line is sung pretty much the same way as it would be spoken. The word "I" gets a multi-note delivery, and "you" is sustained a bit. But basically, the Line is 'sent' as it would be spoken, and is easily 'received' the first time you hear it. It communicates.

Strother Martin, a character actor, in the movie "Cool Hand Luke", delivers a 'catch-phrase',
"What we have here is a failure to communicate."
Don't have a failure to communicate.


There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1166283 - 07/06/20 01:57 AM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
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The first Line came to me, then the second, and it sounded like the Singer-Character and Love-Interest Character had something to explain, to each other, so I tried to let them.
I don't 'like' the Song, but I thought it was worth 'fabricating', or 'crafting' it to see if I could tell their story, or let them tell it. C/G F G7 G Am

"In A Funny Way" copyright June 24, 2020 by Gary E. Andrews.

(Verse I)
I've been hiding Long Beach.
You've been hiding L. A.
You've been out of my reach.
I've been out of your way.
You woke me up today,
just to say,
"I love you,"
(Chorus Refrain)
In A Funny Way.

(Verse II)
I was dancing with Long Beach.
I saw you kissing L. A.
You know when you both cheat,
there's not much more to say.
You called me up today,
just to say,
"I love you," In A Funny Way.

(Bridge)
In A Funny Way,
things are working out.
At the end of the day,
isn't that what it's all about?
In a tragic comedy,
somebody has to say,
"I love you", In A Funny Way.

(Verse III)
I've been living with Long Beach.
You've been loving L. A.
Life has lessons to teach.
Love has prices to pay.
When my phone rang today,
I heard you say,
"I still love you," In A Funny Way.
"I still love you," In A Funny Way.
"I still love you," In A Funny Way.

Last edited by Gary E. Andrews; 07/08/20 01:34 AM.

There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1166499 - 07/11/20 10:11 PM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
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"All The Way To Texas" copyright April 30, 2020 by Gary E. Andrews. All Rights Reserved.
F D7 G7 C7 A7 D

I came All The Way To Texas, (Chorus Refrain)
to help you find your way back home.
I thought we were so in love,
I wondered what went wrong.
Now I know, you won't go,
back to Oh-hi-o-o-oh!
I came All The Way To Texas,
to find out what I should have known.

I spent way too much money,
I was savin' up to buy a guitar,
thinkin' I could play it and make some more,
to fix up this old car.
Now it's plain, Texas Jane's
been ridin' in the ro-de-o-o!
I came All The Way To Texas,
to learn what I already know!

(Bridge)
You're not the girl you used to be!
You used to be my world!
Now you're a flirty floozy!
A Texas party girl!

I came All The Way To Texas.
I drove all night alone.
(You know how I hate that!)
You could have told me all of this,
yesterday on the phone!
Now I see, I might be,
better off a-lo-o-one.
I came All The Way To Texas,
to find out what I should have known!

(Coda)
I came All The Way To Texas,
to learn,
what I al---ready know!

Last edited by Gary E. Andrews; 07/13/20 01:01 AM.

There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com
#1167230 - 08/02/20 02:23 AM Re: SHOWCASE: LYRICS/SONGS BY GARY E. ANDREWS [Re: Gary E. Andrews]  
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@mediaresearch advises that:
The average length of a Song in 2020 is 3 minutes and 42 seconds, down from 4 minutes and 22 seconds.
Introductory Movements have decreased from 13.1 seconds to 7.4 seconds.
Hip Hop accounts for 6 of the top ten on Billboard.
The average number of Songwriters per Song is four.
"The times they are a'changin'."

"Enough", "Not Enough", "Too Much".

An Introductory Movement only needs to be long enough to serve that function. Its function is to 'hook' listener interest long enough for the main body of the Composition to begin, a Verse or Chorus, if it is a vocalized Lyric, or just the 'new' sounds of whatever you give them next. A short Introductory Movement leaves more time for everything that follows. I call that 'hook' element 'Hook Factor'. All parts of the Composition have, or should have, Hook Factor.
This principle of a short Intro is part of the 'rule' "Don't bore us! Get to the Chorus!"
Whatever follows the Intro, the Chorus, if your Compositions opens with the Chorus, or Verse I, if that's the next component, should have Hook Factor. That first Line of Lyric, or that first instrumental sound, individual Notes in a Melody, or other 'sounds', should capitalize on the Hook Factor of the Intro, and sustain Hook Factor, keeping them interested. How long can you do that? If you keep the Composition moving, instrumentally or with the Lyrical Storyline, you can keep them all the way through the 3 minute 42 second time span. The Human attention span can be longer than that if you have a longer Composition, but for 'pop', meaning 'popular' music, in any genre, staying short can be a virtue. Start, entertain, and end.
A Composition must have 'Enough' Repetition and 'Enough' Change.
Enough Repetition supplies Structure the listener can relate to. They recognize the Verse Movement, the Change to the Chorus, a more emotional intensity, usually a higher pitch, and then the Repetition of the Melody they 'learned' in hearing Verse I when you employ it again in Verse II. I contend that even in instrumental or Rap/Hip Hop or Jazz genres that adherence to Repetitional/Change Structure can be more successful at hooking and sustaining Hook Factor than a Composition that does not employ those elements.
The 'Enough' concept is the Songwriter's judgment call. How much Introductory Movement is 'Enough'? How much is 'Too Much'? How much is 'Not Enough'? With experience a Songwriter should begin to sense the timing of components, sensing when Enough Intro has been given and it is 'time' to begin the main body of the work. You should sense when Enough Verse has been exposed to set the scene and it is 'time' for the Chorus. Try your Songs with the Chorus to start and see if that works, in your judgment call. Examine the Verse Lyric and see if there's 'Enough' exposition, or 'Too Much', or 'Not Enough'. Remember, "Don't bore us! Get to the Chorus!"
How much Repetition is Enough? How much Change is Enough? Too much? Not Enough? A Song that is continually Changing lacks Structure. A Song that is continually Repeating gets monotonous; mono-tone-ous. Either can allow the listener to become 'unhooked'. They drift off to other thoughts, stop paying attention, and only realize it when the Song ends and they realize they haven't been listening, and may not be interested in listening again.
Terrestrial radio play used to earn Royalties, making money for the Songwriter(s) and Publisher. The reason they played music was not to promote the art; it was to keep listeners 'hooked' until they could play the commercial ads that pay the bills. Short Songs left more time for commercial ads. Songs used to be two minutes long. It is surprising to listen to those Songs now and realize they do not seem 'short'. They get done everything a Song needs to get done, in their two minutes and a few seconds. They are 'Enough'.
Who is 'buying' music now, and how? How are 'consumers' 'consuming'? Where is the market for your product? If you can supply their desires and demands you can sell in that marketplace.


There will always be another song to be written. Someone will write it. Why not you? www.garyeandrews.com

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