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Joined: Jun 2011
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https://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=14048444IF ONLY All the streets were bare— the silence filled the air, as I walked through the places you and I once knew. And you were everywhere . . . A ghost under the lights that lined these roads, and dark apartments, row by row. If I could only walk with you hand in hand again, by a river, by a stream, in a park, not just a dream. If I could only be with you on some warm summer night drinking wine and dancing to the rhythm of life— How good it would be just you and me , , , If only. What's Armaggeddon? The road they say we’re heading down to the end, with no cure for our suffering. I'd risk it all to hold you tight, to have you by my side tonight— anything it takes I’d sacrifice. (C) And the churches in defiance, from the altars old hymns play. And they float upon the desperate wind then the echoes fade away. And they all hold as much promise as the helpless words they pray— If they ever see the light of day, who’ll listen anyway? I reached home like before . . . I didn’t even lock my door— there’s nobody out there, and I’m past the point that I care. So I’m sitting here needing you and there’s not a damn thing I can do— You’re too far away— I’m stuck here and you’re too far away . . . C (C) DAVID LEKICH AND JOHN VAUGHAN
Last edited by Travis david; 05/18/20 06:15 AM.
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Joined: Jul 2017
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Love it ! Congrats on a really good song guys.
Ckiphen
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Hi Ckiphen Thanks for the listen and thumbs up. Most appreciated John
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Joined: Dec 2006
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Hey Guys, That's a great tune, very natural and the prosody is spot on. Small nit ? The overall production sounds to me a bit thin. No mids perhaps ? How about some EQ , a line compressor for the vocal and a compressor on the stereo out ? I think this would give it some "beef" . A well written song anyways. cheers, niteshift
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Joined: Jun 2011
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Thanks for your comments and suggestions Niteshift. Dave I'm sure will respond to the technical bits you mentioned. Good to know you liked the song however. Regards John
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,831
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Listened yesterday but got called away to the telephone. Distractions caused other unwanted activities. I really enjoyed what I heard. Best of luck with it, you two. Shifty may be "on to something" but he has better "ears" than me. ----Dave
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Joined: May 2017
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I absolutely love this. Maybe my favorite lyric of yours. I seem to remember I said that about the last thing you did, but this tops it, and Deej's voice just takes it to another level. Congrats!
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Hi Dave Thanks for having a listen and comments. All suggestions have been noted, so a further thanks Regards John
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Hi Gavin Many thanks for your support and likes once again. Best Regards John
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 4,126 Likes: 29
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Before I listened I expected it to be good. It was.
Pretty and feeling.
Martin
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Hi Martin Good to know you like the song. Thanks fot listening Regards John
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Joined: Nov 2010
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Melody, music and lyrics are really good. Maybe a little long but it's a good one.
Vic
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Ta Vic, glad you liked this one John
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Joined: May 2010
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So much longing, a great story and wonderful vocal, I really like the melody and sing, they match the lyric, enjoyed it!!
Tammy
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Thanks Tammy Pleased you liked this one John
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Joined: Sep 2007
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Well I listened to this tune & I am just asking myself when you wrote this?
Was this written before or after the pandemic?
Okay is it just me or do all 5 verses describe separation because of the pandemic?
Last edited by Steve Altonian; 05/25/20 05:11 AM.
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Hi Steve I wrote the original lyric about the pandemic and how it came to separate people fro loved ones, eventually leading to total isolation. Dave suggested a different angle, the loss of a partner. So yes the pandemic figured strongly and penned within a week or two of the lockdown here in the UK. The rewrites, music and vocal came gradually over a 6 or 7 week period Cheers John
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Joined: Mar 2020
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Casual Observer
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Enjoyed this, well done, love the title and the song creates lots of visuals. I've nothing else to add. Kevin
Kevin
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Cheers Kevin Thanks for your feedback and welcome to the boards John
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,385 Likes: 1
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Ckiphen, Dave, Gavin, Martin, Vic, Tams, and Jethro:
Thanks all for listening to the song and for your kind feedback. I had worried it was a bit too sad and dark, but it seems to have resonated they way Travis and I intended. Glad you all seemed to enjoy it.
Stay well all,
Deej
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niteshift,
You are indeed on to something and it’s an aspect I expected to get production wise. I made an adjustment on the EQ after seeing your comment a few days back. It helped, but not enough to get the vocal to align quite the way I would want. I may give it another go, but suspect redoing the vocal in a different space may be the best answer. Thanks for the comment and glad you enjoyed regardless.
Regards,
Deej
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Joined: Dec 2016
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Steve,
Travis’s reply to your comment is pretty much spot on. It is very much a COVID19 inspired song. My one desire was that the song have a “life” so to speak after all of this is behind us. And so I did suggest early on that it be about the loss of a partner.
However, in the final lyric I took out a specific line that would have made that more definitive. And so it’s intentionally a little open-ended in that regard. But at its heart, it’s a song about the loneliness, helplessness, and despair that comes with separation. And hopefully that comes through.
Regards,
Deej
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Joined: Apr 2008
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D always up to hearing your voice, wow. what a write, you guys did a great job. Hey Travis,,,you both teamed up on this. that really is quite a write..
Last edited by lane1777; 05/26/20 05:19 PM.
"Blessed are the words of truth and fiction, one might save you from the other...Vincent
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Lane,
Thanks for stopping in . . . and good to see you on the board. I hope all is good with you. Glad you enjoyed the write and the song!
Stay well and stay safe,
Deej
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niteshift (and others): I've made a go at trying to tinker with what I have. Here's a revised version, though I'm not sure it's that much better . . . perhaps? As it turns out, the reverb setting on the vocal was less than the instruments, but I've lowered a bit more. Listening now, maybe just a bit more still? Anyway, if it works better for listeners, I'll ask Travis to update the original link above: Modified Version of If OnlyThanks to all. Deej
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"If one man can do it, any man can do it. It is true. But the real question is, if one man did it, are you willing to do what it takes to do it as well?" –Brian Austin Whitney
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