Who's Online Now
8 members (Fdemetrio, Sunset Poet, Guy E. Trepanier, VNORTH2, JAPOV, 3 invisible), 1,184 guests, and 249 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Register Today!
Welcome to the Just Plain Folks forums! You are currently viewing our forums as a Guest which gives you limited access to most of our discussions and to other features.

By joining our free community you will have access to post and respond to topics, communicate privately with our users (PM), respond to polls, upload content, and access many other features. Registration is fast, simple, and absolutely free; so please join our community today!
ShoutChat
Comment Guidelines: Do post respectful and insightful comments. Don't flame, hate, spam.
What's Going On
Save Yer Ass
by Fdemetrio - 04/18/24 09:16 PM
Problem I foresee with ai
by John Lawrence Schick - 04/18/24 05:42 PM
The Wolves Of Fading
by JAPOV - 04/18/24 04:37 PM
Holding On For Tomorrow
by Bill Draper - 04/18/24 01:58 PM
YELLIN AT CLOUDS
by Bill Draper - 04/18/24 01:25 PM
Boss Tribute
by Fdemetrio - 04/18/24 02:27 AM
Noah Wotherspoon, Cappy's Wine, Loveland
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/17/24 10:18 PM
What my heart denied
by Bill Draper - 04/17/24 06:11 PM
Donovan Tolle music
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/17/24 02:30 PM
Above the Tortoise
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/17/24 12:46 PM
Wasting My Time
by Fdemetrio - 04/17/24 12:20 PM
More fun and aggravation
by Fdemetrio - 04/16/24 02:14 PM
New Music Creation Tool Changes Everything
by Fdemetrio - 04/16/24 01:08 PM
Having too much fun
by Sunset Poet - 04/16/24 09:28 AM
Mutlu
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/15/24 07:08 PM
Werhun Band
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/15/24 12:50 PM
One Kiss At A Time (Carroll Kiphen's lyric)
by ckiphen - 04/15/24 08:45 AM
Boss Bioptic Coming
by Fdemetrio - 04/14/24 12:00 AM
I made you money on spotify
by Fdemetrio - 04/13/24 02:01 PM
Inspirational Videos Post Them Here
by Sunset Poet - 04/13/24 10:22 AM
Argyle Theatre at Babalon Village,
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/13/24 05:57 AM
Hulkster a Christian
by Fdemetrio - 04/13/24 12:29 AM
Name That Tune Challenge
by John Lawrence Schick - 04/12/24 03:49 PM
Does Billy Joel belong in top 10?
by Fdemetrio - 04/12/24 11:21 AM
Fox News Reports Stunning Archeological Discovery.
by Fdemetrio - 04/12/24 11:19 AM
WORLD5 - Review Upcoming Album "3" by ViriAOR
by World5 Music - 04/12/24 11:19 AM
Bossa Nova Beatniks
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/09/24 01:30 PM
2 Miles Deep
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/08/24 11:09 PM
Fire Tiger
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/07/24 12:01 PM
Highly effective country boy
by bennash - 04/06/24 01:24 PM
Top Posters
Calvin 19,857
Travis david 12,264
Kevin Emmrich 10,941
Jean Bullock 10,330
Kaley Willow 10,240
Two Singers 9,649
Joice Marie 9,186
Mackie H. 9,003
glynda 8,683
Mike Dunbar 8,574
Tricia Baker 8,318
couchgrouch 8,164
Colin Ward 7,911
Corey 7,357
Vicarn 6,916
Mark Kaufman 6,589
ben willis 6,114
Lynn Orloff 5,788
Louis 5,725
Linda Sings 5,608
KimberlyinNC 5,210
Fdemetrio 5,114
Neil Cotton 4,909
Derek Hines 4,893
DonnaMarilyn 4,670
Blake Hill 4,528
Bob Cushing 4,389
Roy Cooper 4,271
Bill Osofsky 4,199
Tom Shea 4,195
Cindy Miller 4,178
TamsNumber4 4,171
Sunset Poet 4,168
MFB III 4,143
nightengale 4,096
E Swartz 3,985
JAPOV 3,984
beechnut79 3,878
Caroline 3,865
Kolstad 3,845
Dan Sullivan 3,710
Dottie 3,427
joewatt 3,411
Bill Cooper 3,279
John Hoffman 3,199
Skip Johnson 3,027
Pam Hurley 3,007
Terry G 3,005
Nigel Quin 2,891
PopTodd 2,890
Harriet Ames 2,870
MidniteBob 2,761
Nelson 2,616
Tom Tracy 2,558
Jerry Jakala 2,524
Al Alvarez 2,499
Eric Thome 2,448
Hummingbird 2,401
Stan Loh 2,263
Sam Wilson 2,246
Wendy D 2,235
Judy Hollier 2,232
Erica Ellis 2,202
maccharles 2,134
TrumanCoyote 2,096
Marty Helly 2,041
DukeWill 2,002
floyd jane 1,985
Clint Anglin 1,904
cindyrella 1,888
David Wright 1,866
Clairejeanne 1,851
Cindy LaRosa 1,824
Ronald Boyt 1,675
Iggy 1,652
Noel Downs 1,633
Rick Heenan 1,608
Cal 1,574
GocartMoz 1,559
Jack Swain 1,554
Pete Larsen 1,537
Ann Tygart 1,529
Tom Breshers 1,487
RogerS 1,481
Tom Franz 1,473
Chuck Crowe 1,441
Ralph Blight 1,440
Rick Norton 1,429
Kenneth Cade 1,429
bholt 1,411
Letha Allen 1,409
in2piano 1,404
Stan Simons 1,402
Deej56 1,385
mattbanx 1,384
Jen Shaner 1,373
Charlie Wong 1,347
KevinP 1,324
Vondelle 1,316
Tom W. 1,313
Jan Petter 1,301
scottandrew 1,294
lane1777 1,280
Gerry 1,280
DakLander 1,265
IronKnee 1,262
PeteG 1,242
Ian Ferrin 1,235
VNORTH2 1,220
Glen King 1,214
IdeaGuy 1,209
AaronAuthier 1,177
summeoyo 1,174
Diane Ewing 1,162
ckiphen 1,124
joro 1,082
BobbyJoe 1,075
S.DEE 1,040
yann 1,037
9ne 1,035
David Gill 1,034
Tony A 1,016
argo 986
peaden 984
90 dB 964
Wolvman 960
Jak Kelly 912
krtinberg 890
Drifter 886
Petra 883
RJC 845
Brenda152 840
Nadia 829
ant 798
Juan 797
TKO 784
Dayson 781
frahmes 781
bennash 772
teletwang 762
Andy K 750
Andy Kemp 749
tbryson 737
Jackie444 731
Irwin 720
3daveyO3 704
Dixie 701
Joy Boy 695
Pat Hardy 692
Knute 686
Lee Arten 678
Moosesong 668
Katziis 652
R.T.MOORE 638
quality 637
CG King 622
douglas 621
R&M 614
Mel 614
NaomiSue 601
Shandy 590
Ria 587
TAMERA64 583
qbaum 570
nitepiano 566
pRISCILLA 556
Tink2 553
musica 539
deanbell 528
RobertK 527
BonzaiWag 523
Roderic 522
BB Wilbur 513
goodfolks 499
Zeek 487
Stu 486
Steve P. 481
KathyW 462
allenb 459
MaxG 458
Philjo 454
fanito 448
trush48 448
dmk 442
Rob L 439
arealrush 437
DGR 436
avweek 435
Stephen D 433
Emmy 431
marquez 422
kit 419
Softkrome 417
kyrksongs 415
RRon 408
Laura G. 407
VNORTH 407
Debra 407
eb 406
cuebald 399
EdPerrone 399
Dannyk1 395
Hobart 395
Davyboy49 393
Smile 389
GJShades 387
Alek 386
Ezt 384
tone 380
Marla 380
Ann_F 379
iggyiggy 378
coalminer 377
java 374
ddreuter 371
spidey 371
sweetsong 370
Rob B. 369
danny 367
Jim Ryan 360
papaG 353
Z - man 350
JamesDF5 348
John K 348
Jaden 344
TheBaz 340
Steggy 339
leif 339
tonedeaf 336
rickwork 334
Eddie Ray 332
Johnboy 328
Bob Lever 328
Helicon1 327
lucian 326
Muskie 321
kc 319
Z. Mulls 318
ptondreau 313
ONOFFON 312
Chris B. 310
trush 304
ed323 297
Ellen M 294
markus-ky 293
lizzorn 291
nicnac49 290
Char 286
ktunes 285
Top Likes Received
JAPOV 86
VNORTH2 45
bennash 38
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Rate Thread
#1163031 04/10/20 10:34 PM
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 230
JaneK Offline OP
Serious Contributor
OP Offline
Serious Contributor
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 230
Hi Everyone,

This is one of the last songs by MZ
Music/Piano/Lyrics by me
The song is a little moody so I was reluctant to put this up.



BREAK OF DAWN

Verse

I toss and turn in bed
Through the night
Look out my window
And see the city lights

Time stands still
The darkness won’t disappear
My mind recycles all
My biggest fears

Prechorus

When the mourning doves call
They make no sense at all
Though I’ve been through this before

Chorus

Until the break of dawn
The night goes on and on
Another sleepless night
Watching the hours go by

Until the break of dawn
The night goes on and on
The light is hiding behind
Another sleepless night



I see a dreary room
As I lay and contemplate
My eyes start to weep
While I plan my escape

Wish I could float away
To somewhere bright and clear
Where the clouds will lift
And the sun heads my way

Repeat prechorus

Repeat chorus


Melody change

I step out the door
And hold my breath
Need to push away
All my regrets
And face the day…..


Repeat Chorus


Copyright
Jane Karwoski
2019


Last edited by JaneK; 04/17/20 01:46 PM.
JaneK #1163034 04/10/20 11:20 PM
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,831
Top 30 Poster
Offline
Top 30 Poster
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,831
Hi Jane:

Really enjoyed my listen. Your vocal (that was you, wasn't it?) was perfect for the song. Nothing wrong with moody... life is not all sublime happiness... LOL! A writer must write what she or he feels compelled to write... and this one is a gem. I hope it opens doors for you.

Then there is Mike Z. I already miss his informative and sometimes argumentative (not without cause) posts. Most of all, I miss having that resource to give me a different perspective or arrangement (within bounds) of one of my songs. All in all, I think he did 14 demos of my already recorded songs... and often, I thought he improved upon them significantly. He is a very special and talented individual and his knowledge of songs, artists and writers is amazing.

I'm looking forward to hearing more of your work... and as always, wishing you happiness and success.

Stay safe, happy and well. Thanks for posting.

----Dave

JaneK #1163048 04/11/20 11:45 AM
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,262
Likes: 19
Top 200 Poster
Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,262
Likes: 19
Thoroughly enjoyable........I'm glad you posted this. The lyrics are good, and fit the melody just right.
Good stuff,
-Tom

JaneK #1163054 04/11/20 02:00 PM
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 230
JaneK Offline OP
Serious Contributor
OP Offline
Serious Contributor
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 230
Tom,

Thanks for the listen and comments - I really appreciate it.


Hi Dave,

Thanks for listening - I appreciate it.

As far as Mike Z, I miss his demo making and this has pretty much but me out of business so to speak. His work on my vocals gave me the confidence to carry on but now I feel terrible about my abilities.

I lack the production skills that he and others here on the forum have so that leaves me out.

I most likely will through in the towel.

JaneK #1163057 04/11/20 03:54 PM
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,831
Top 30 Poster
Offline
Top 30 Poster
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,831
Jane:

Confidence is much like attempting a vertical climb up the face of a mountain with no safety line. It is gained slowly and with much effort. I urge you to continue your struggle. Sure, there is so much competition and the odds are so great... but your thoughts, voice and ideas are free and you don't have to post every song. Only "roll out" the ones you believe are worthy of "bruising the listener's ears"... and thoughts. You have already crossed the barrier so don't hide your talents under a bushel basket.

Always think of a song and lyric as a living thing. Few are perfect and most require a touch of different phrasing here and there, a slight change in the melody... or a complete re-write. I never perform but if I don't post my recordings and vocals... nobody will do it for me. I have become sort of a "fisherman" using my demo songs as bait... and hoping somebody famous will "bite" and do a "cover."

You can do this. You already have!

All my best wishes, ----Dave

JaneK #1163058 04/11/20 03:59 PM
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 3,985
Likes: 22
Top 100 Poster
Offline
Top 100 Poster
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 3,985
Likes: 22
Jane,

What a nice listen! I loved the melody and your voice perfect for this song. Glad you and Mike connected. Well done!

steady-eddie

JaneK #1163059 04/11/20 05:09 PM
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 238
Likes: 11
Serious Contributor
Online Content
Serious Contributor
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 238
Likes: 11
Well written and well done!

You wrote "I most likely will through in the towel."

Continue writing songs.
Write as many songs as you want.
Some will be better than others.
It's part of the game.

Have fun!

JaneK #1163077 04/12/20 07:18 AM
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 12,264
Likes: 4
T
Top 10 Poster
Offline
Top 10 Poster
T
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 12,264
Likes: 4
Jane this is a beautiful song. Excellent vocal really good lyric and an all round gem!. Regards
John


We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
JaneK #1163097 04/12/20 04:48 PM
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 230
JaneK Offline OP
Serious Contributor
OP Offline
Serious Contributor
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 230
Thanks again Dave, Tom, Eddie, Guy and John for the comments and encouragement.

I actually am not going to "throw in the towel" on songwriting (poor choice of words). I'm leaving JP folks with quite a few finished songs I can play for myself from Mike Z.

I'm not going to participate in the site any longer - I will keep doing music for myself and have decided I am going to try SongU and also Songtown to learn more about the craft and hopefully find some collaborators to help me. Just for fun - I am not aiming for fame or fortune - just being the best songwriter/musician I am capable of being.

Sorry to go off topic here on the MP3 forum but I what to thank you all again who have been so kind to me when you didn't have to be and I wish you much success with your songwriting endeavors.


Jane








Last edited by JaneK; 04/14/20 05:37 PM.
JaneK #1163100 04/12/20 06:39 PM
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Top 200 Poster
Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Jane,

I really enjoyed this. Production can't make a bad song good in my opinion.It can make a good song better. Don't stop writing because of a lack of production skills. Keep on writing. This is a gem. I enjoyed it.

I kind of come on as time allows, but I am afraid I missed Mike not being here. I hope he is ok and nothing happened. He was such an asset to these forums. Thx for posting your tune. Enjoyed it.

Dave

JaneK #1163158 04/14/20 04:06 AM
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 1,280
Top 200 Poster
Offline
Top 200 Poster
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 1,280
Just lovely and production skills come with practice and time so don't be disheartened. It really is a lovely song.

Stay Safe,

Gerry

JaneK #1163177 04/14/20 10:26 AM
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 230
JaneK Offline OP
Serious Contributor
OP Offline
Serious Contributor
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 230
Hi Dave and Gerry,

Thank you for listening and the encouragement. I really appreciate it.

Stay safe both of you.

Jane

JaneK #1163241 04/15/20 09:12 PM
Joined: Oct 2019
Posts: 211
Likes: 2
Serious Contributor
Offline
Serious Contributor
Joined: Oct 2019
Posts: 211
Likes: 2
Hi Jane
What a great song this is - love how the prechorus builds up to the chorus.
Super vocals and keyboards. Needs an electric guitar for some bite!
Solid lyrics though there were a few spots they seemed rushed.
Enjoyed the listen!
Paul

JaneK #1163244 04/15/20 10:40 PM
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 230
JaneK Offline OP
Serious Contributor
OP Offline
Serious Contributor
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 230
Hi Paul,

Thanks for the nice comments - yes I agree an electric guitar would make the song "rock" more and I think I sung it a little too fast in parts (I am still working on how to sing my lyrics).

So glad you stopped by for a listen.

Stay safe
Jane

JaneK #1163412 04/19/20 09:33 PM
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,385
Likes: 1
D
Top 200 Poster
Offline
Top 200 Poster
D
Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,385
Likes: 1
Jane,

Sorry I somewhat missed this one. I say “somewhat” because though the link is down now, I did have.a chance to listen to some of it a few days back (but didn’t have time yet to post). From memory, I really liked what was done here--wish I could hear it again. But you’ve gotten some great feedback above, so I’ll have to settle with looking forward and hearing the next iteration. Hope it’s soon.

All my best,

Deej


Link Copied to Clipboard
Support Just Plain Folks

We would like to keep the membership in Just Plain Folks FREE! Your donation helps support the many programs we offer including Road Trips and the Music Awards.


Newest Members
chriscastle, yasir252, cathennashira, Samwise, HappySousa
21,470 Registered Users
Forum Statistics
Forums117
Topics125,754
Posts1,161,302
Members21,470
Most Online37,523
Jan 25th, 2020
Just Plain Quotes
"When will we all, as artists, creators and facilitators learn that the so-called experts in our lives are nothing more than someone who has stepped forward and called themselves an expert?" –Brian Austin Whitney
Today's Birthdays
There are no members with birthdays on this day.
Popular Topics(Views)
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5