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#1156382 - 09/11/19 05:55 AM Back From Who I Am 1st rewrite  
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 4,092
nightengale Offline
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nightengale  Offline
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Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 4,092
Eugene, Or USA
1st rewrite

V1
I'd forgotten back where I come from
When a man falls in the drink
There's no excuse for that thing he does
If he's hooked just let him sink

V2
So I decide it's time to drift away
My heavy heart becomes a rollin' stone
A weight that weighs on me so deep
I can't pack up and go back home

Pre chorus
Another shot in the dark
More voices in my head
Not a word of anybody, findin' some good in me yet

Chorus
Then she come along
She came on strong
Bound to love me back from who I am

Her helpin' hands took no pity on me
She picked me up in sweet tough love
That took a load off a drownin' man
Now she's my savin' grace because

Pre chorus
Another shot in the dark
More voices in my head
Everybody needs a kind word, she's not through speakin' yet

Chorus
Since she come along
She came on strong
Bound to love me back from who I am

Bridge
I wasn't lookin' for'ta be redeemed
When she pulled me from the depths
Every lost soul needs a beam of light
I found my truth and my happiness


Pre chorus
She was a shot in the dark
She's the sweet voice in my head
Every bit of love I need, andshe's not let go of me yet

Chorus
Since she come along
She came on strong
Bound to love me back from who I am




Back From Who I Am

(C) 2019 Geneva Griffin

V1
My hardened heart had turned to stone
That love gone wrong left me petrified
Kept me rollin' down twice shy road
A man once bitten he don't think twice

Chorus
Then she come along
She came on strong
Bound to love me back from who I am

She'd chisel at my heart with love
Chip away at the life I'd chosen
Carve through to this man I become
Polish what was left beneath that stone

Chorus
When she come along
She came on strong
Bound to love me back from who I am

Bridge
After bein' kicked around like an old tin can
Her love has rendered me a defenseless man
Whoever says a rollin' stone gathers no moss
Hasn't been in her arms where I wanna stay lost

Chorus
When she come along
She came on strong
It took one strong woman to change this man

Ya she came along
She still comes on strong
I melt like silly putty in her hands

Last edited by nightengale; 09/26/19 11:13 AM.
#1156532 - 09/18/19 12:18 AM Re: Back From Who I Am [Re: nightengale]  
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 376
JAPOV Offline
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JAPOV  Offline
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Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 376
North Alabama
I really like the chorus!

I think the verses need to be "written to" "back from who I am".... Does that make sense?
Like...

She's a master with a chisel
She knows my heart's a stone
She terrifies me
But at least I'm not alone.....


JAPOV is Just Another Point Of View but my friends call me Tony. If you like to sing then I'd like to know ya' smile https://www.soundclick.com/bands3/?bandID=1449856
#1156573 - 09/19/19 02:49 AM Re: Back From Who I Am [Re: nightengale]  
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 4,092
nightengale Offline
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nightengale  Offline
Top 100 Poster

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 4,092
Eugene, Or USA
Thanks Tony,

It took me a while to get it but now it makes sense. Ya, I just might give that a try.

Geneva

#1156578 - 09/19/19 04:10 AM Re: Back From Who I Am [Re: nightengale]  
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 376
JAPOV Offline
Top 500 Poster
JAPOV  Offline
Top 500 Poster

Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 376
North Alabama
Lol... A simpler way to put it is just make it all present tense. You've got a great hook here, keep working it. POUND IT INTO SUBMISSION!! smile
Do you have a rhythm/melody?


JAPOV is Just Another Point Of View but my friends call me Tony. If you like to sing then I'd like to know ya' smile https://www.soundclick.com/bands3/?bandID=1449856
#1156972 - 09/26/19 04:23 AM Re: Back From Who I Am [Re: nightengale]  
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 4,092
nightengale Offline
Top 100 Poster
nightengale  Offline
Top 100 Poster

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 4,092
Eugene, Or USA
Thanks Tony I'm working on it trying something different.

Got no melody other than the head tune I wrote it to for meter, I don't count syllables.

Geneva

#1156975 - 09/26/19 06:46 AM Re: Back From Who I Am [Re: nightengale]  
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 4,092
nightengale Offline
Top 100 Poster
nightengale  Offline
Top 100 Poster

Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 4,092
Eugene, Or USA
1st rewrite

Trying to copy and paste to the top

V1
I'd forgotten where I came from
When I fell into the drink
There what I do makes me what I am
I'm just hooked and about to sink

V2
So then I drift like a rollin' stone
With a heart heavy as rock
A weight that weighs on me so deep
Can't pick back up where I didn't leave off

Chorus
When she come along
She came on strong
Bound to love me back from who I am

Her helpin' hand took no pity
She didn't judge with her tough love
That took a load off a drownin' man
Now she's my savin' grace because

Chorus
When she come along
She came on strong
Bound to love me back from who I am

Bridge
I wasn't lookin' for redemption
When she pulled me from the depths
Every lost soul needs a beam of light
I found truth and happiness

Chorus
When she come along
She came on strong
Bound to love me back from who I am

Last edited by nightengale; 09/26/19 06:53 AM.
#1157353 - 10/05/19 10:48 AM Re: Back From Who I Am [Re: nightengale]  
Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 376
JAPOV Offline
Top 500 Poster
JAPOV  Offline
Top 500 Poster

Joined: Jun 2019
Posts: 376
North Alabama
I wish responding to a thread automatically put you on the follow list lol....


I had forgotten where I'm from
When I fell into the drink
What I do is what I am
And that boat was about to sink

I took solace in the storm
And dared the cold, dark deep
Flew my Jolly Roger and
To hell my soul to keep

But the sea did me a favor
And a siren was my savior

She's a warm west wind
She's my anchor and a friend
She’s a tempest in a dress
when I'm turned around
I never felt so strong
Until she came along
Bound to love me back from who I am

Just a thought... smile


JAPOV is Just Another Point Of View but my friends call me Tony. If you like to sing then I'd like to know ya' smile https://www.soundclick.com/bands3/?bandID=1449856
#1157717 - 10/13/19 01:51 PM Re: Back From Who I Am [Re: nightengale]  
Joined: Sep 2019
Posts: 18
CTthomas Online content
Casual Observer
CTthomas  Online Content
Casual Observer

Joined: Sep 2019
Posts: 18
Nice


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