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#1155877 - 08/14/19 11:59 PM A Bright New Day  
Joined: Dec 2016
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Deej56 Offline
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Hi, all:

It’s been hard lately finding time for music and the like . . . the real world keeps getting in the way. So finding time to seriously record . . . and spend on JPF . . . has been challenging. Anyway, my vision for this song is actually a more uptempo rock song—at least I wrote it with that intent But it’s going to take me some time to “BIAB” it—assuming I even can—so in the meantime, I did this alternate acoustic take on the song. As always, appreciate your support and feedback.

My best to you all on JPF!

Here's the song:

A Bright New Day

Here are the lyrics:

It’s been a black rain—
everyday, all the same,
with its pitter-patter sound.
We’re locked in iron chains,
in the mud, here’s the flood—
we better swim before we drown.

Shed the restraints—
believe and we can make it happen;
make some good out of what ain’t—
just a little more faith can spark a chemical reaction

And break the chains;
clear the fault lines;
‘till naught remains
but the light of a bright new day.

Must be a good place;
a pretty one, shining sun
in a meadow by the sea.
Let’s leave this rat race—
turn our backs on the black
and go where we deserve to be.

Seize the moment—
shake these bonds and see them shatter.
The future’s not set,
and our next day is all that matters.

Let’s break the chains;
clear the fault lines;
‘till naught remains but the light
of a bright new day.

It’s nothing: This storm hanging over us.
There’s not one thing really stopping us.
It’s a choice that we have to believe in the promise
of a love that we share if we’d only be so honest
to embrace our mistakes, put the endless blame behind us,
and dream that we can dream this right,
turn iron to clay and dark to light.

Seize the moment—
shake these bonds and see them shatter.
The future’s not set,
and our next day is all that matters.

Let’s break the chains;
clear the fault lines;
‘till naught remains but the light
of a bright new day.

(c)2019 DJ Lekich

#1155882 - 08/15/19 05:22 AM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
Joined: Apr 2002
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Calvin Offline
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Calvin  Offline
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Okeechobee, Florida U.S.A.
Hi Deej,


Fresh - uplifting - and.................cool vocals.


Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

#1155895 - 08/15/19 09:10 PM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Calvin]  
Joined: Sep 2017
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JaneK Offline
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JaneK  Offline
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Posts: 230
California
Hello Deej.

Oh wow this is so beautiful! I love it just the way it is - guitar and vocal. BIAB would make a fuller arrangement, but as it is now - I love it and I love your vocals.

I especially like these lines:

Let’s break the chains;
clear the fault lines;
‘till naught remains but the light
of a bright new day.

.

#1155937 - 08/18/19 09:59 PM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
Joined: Dec 2016
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Deej56 Offline
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Deej56  Offline
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Calvin and Jane,

Thanks so much for the listen--glad it was worth the spin. Not sure I'll get around to doing the rock version to it, but nice to know it worked in its simplest form.

My kindest regards to you both,

Deej

#1156432 - 09/13/19 02:25 PM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
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Posts: 11,921
Travis david Offline
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Kendal, Cumbria .UK
Hi Dave
Loved this, always been a fan of that unique vouce
Regards
Johb


We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
#1156528 - 09/17/19 09:55 PM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,552
GocartMoz Offline
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Florida
Hey DeeJay,

Have to agree with Jane. This song is beautiful with just that guitar and vocal. No need to give this a rock production. I love the unplugged version just as is. Great lyric, melody and vocal. Acoustic sounds lovely, as well Ecellently recorded. If anything, maybe double up the acoustic and spread and add some harmonies and you have a killer tune. Already do.

Dave

#1156550 - 09/18/19 04:11 PM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
Joined: Jun 2019
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JAPOV Offline
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JAPOV  Offline
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That’s always the danger of hearing a rough acoustic take first lol. With your voice however Dee, I’d love to hear how you imagine a full production of this! smile

#1156554 - 09/18/19 06:21 PM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
Joined: Oct 2017
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Fdemetrio Offline
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Fdemetrio  Offline
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Its a sweet song. My only nit is that the vocals seem strained. Could be dialed down a notch

Good stuff. It actually reminds me of a band called Gin Blossoms, melodically anyway

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 09/18/19 06:23 PM.
#1156561 - 09/18/19 09:01 PM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 12,071
Scott Campbell Offline
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Lakeland, FL, USA
Hey Deej:

I'll keep an open mind but I don't think this will be improved by a bigger production. It works great with a guitar - only backing. The meaning really comes through with this arrangement. It's really nice!

Scott

#1156610 - 09/19/19 05:55 PM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
Joined: Sep 2007
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Steve Altonian Online content
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You can add instruments, but a full version will kill it...Violin maybe as well as another guitarist (acoustic) Harmonies would be cool...

Build aroud this, don't re-do it

Just my opinion

BTW, why didn't you name it "Break The Chains"?


Steve Altonian---"I'll just do my best & let God do the rest"

http://www.stevealtonian.com
#1156688 - 09/20/19 07:59 PM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,097
Michael Zaneski Offline
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Michael Zaneski  Offline
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Posts: 5,097
California
Hi Deej,

Beautiful song, sung with much feeling, as is your trademark. I love the intricate prosody and rhythm of the verse lines, almost like nursery rhymes but with syncopation. Excellent phrasing as usual. You grab those high notes very early on. I tend to wait past the first verse, but with you I was thinking, it kind of imbues "the singer" with a beautiful aura and spirit I associate with singers of Gospel music.

Mike


Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice
Fortune depends on the tone of your voice

-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon)
from the song "Songs of Love"
from the album "Casanova" (1996)
#1156709 - 09/21/19 02:00 AM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
Joined: Dec 2016
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Deej56 Offline
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Deej56  Offline
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Travis, Dave, JAPOV, Fdemetrio, Scott, Steve, and Mr. Z:

Thank you all for the listen and the feedback . . . it's really appreciated. Glad the acoustic version can stand on it's own--agree that I can probably augment it as Dave and Steve recommend. If I don't do the "rock" version, I will go back and take up your suggestions to fill this one out.

Fdemetrio: Your nit is spot on. I wrote this in standard tuning, recorded it tuned down a step . . . but even then I'm pushing my upper range just a tad. I need to go down another half step (at least), but I'm not fond of tuning down the guitar more than a half-step. If I were to revisit acoustically, I think I would need to compromise some. :-)

Thanks all.

Regards,

Deej

#1156721 - 09/21/19 10:20 AM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 2,066
Sunset Poet Online content
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Sunset Poet  Online Content
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Houston, Texas
Hey DJ

I've been heavily distracted by work lately and missed this.

Always enjoy your songs. This one too.

FD is right. You do sound reaching at the top, but I have a lot less range than you and I never tune below standard because the strings start to rattle, even half step low.
The song came across, as is, and it is even arguable that the strain in the vocals expresses the earnestness of the sentiment in the lyric.

Martin

#1156724 - 09/21/19 10:29 AM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
Joined: Oct 2017
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Fdemetrio Offline
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Fdemetrio  Offline
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Originally Posted by Deej56
Travis, Dave, JAPOV, Fdemetrio, Scott, Steve, and Mr. Z:

Thank you all for the listen and the feedback . . . it's really appreciated. Glad the acoustic version can stand on it's own--agree that I can probably augment it as Dave and Steve recommend. If I don't do the "rock" version, I will go back and take up your suggestions to fill this one out.

Fdemetrio: Your nit is spot on. I wrote this in standard tuning, recorded it tuned down a step . . . but even then I'm pushing my upper range just a tad. I need to go down another half step (at least), but I'm not fond of tuning down the guitar more than a half-step. If I were to revisit acoustically, I think I would need to compromise some. :-)

Thanks all.

Regards,

Deej


Dee, sometimes you dont have to change a key, just how you are singing it. You can go softer in volume and still reach those notes, just add a little more air instead of muscle....

You can also try capoing, are you using a software guitar or real guitar?

This is all subjective of course, but i prefer saying something when theres still a chance to make a change if needed, ie... acoustic demo.

Its a good song either way.

#1156733 - 09/21/19 01:27 PM Re: A Bright New Day [Re: Deej56]  
Joined: Jun 2019
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JAPOV Offline
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JAPOV  Offline
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I believe your voice would serve a rock version quite well... Isn’t that the trend anyway? Put out the unplugged version later... smile


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