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#1145280 - 10/10/18 03:40 PM She Stole My Gizmo  
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 245
John Paragreen Offline
Serious Contributor
John Paragreen  Offline
Serious Contributor

Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 245
She Stole My Gizmo

Got home from work and the whole pad was empty
My chick flapped out, a note was all she left me,
So I hit the blue light station, all raging and tense
Said officer I got robbed and hereís the evidence,
The cop read every line, and mumbled it aint a crime
To switch lovers,
I said aint nothing to do, with no coochy coo
Under king size covers.

I told him
She can keep the t v. pans and cutlery
Fridge and toast rack
But she stole my hound
And I want him back.

Well I flashed my Samsung screen photo
Heís a who knows breed, his name is Gizmo,
Been treated for fleas, wormed and inoculated
His tailís chopped off and heís been castrated,
In a desperate tone, I said I dug up this bone
For his D N A,
Wont ever sleep or dose, till heís licking my nose
And messing my driveway.

And I said
She can keep the carpets, bed sheets and blankets
My c d stack
But she stole my Gizmo
And I want him back.

Well the sergeant butt in like Frankenstein
Wanted concrete proof the pooch was mine
I said my canine creds are easy to check
Cause Iím the dude on the chip in his neck,
Like Sherlock Homes, I sussed in my bones
That sarge was sneaky
Never thought the eyesore, she dumped me for
Would look that creepy.

Still I said
She can sell the kettle, and my boy scout medal
Slug my cognac
But she stole my Gizmo
And I want him back.

A sad moon crept by and I cried and wailed
Needed Gizmo home, and my woman jailed
So I hired a P I to tail that ugly sergeant
Cost me an arm and leg but worth every cent.
Had em on video, chucking rocks for Gizmo
Strolling by the sea,
I decided real fast. to sue her cute ass
On Judge Judy.

And I thought
She can pawn my blender, and vintage fender
And trolley jack
But she stole my Gizmo
And I want him back

Ten tear gushing weeks then we were in court
My cheap suit felt cool but one sleeve was short
She wore heels and a frilly pink dress
Still dead sexy and totally gorgeous,
Like a warm cucumber, Bert read the number
With a kiddish delight,
Judy thanked him, with a wink and a grin
Like they had a wild night.

Told myself
She can roll in passion, with Draculas cousin
Iím over that
But she stole my Gizmo
And I want him back.

Well J J giggled as she spat out my beef
Sheís a mutt loving granny with teenage teeth,
Giz was freaking out in the corridor
Barking and scratching that fake oak door,
Judy leaned slightly, and told Bert politely
Fetch him inside,
By a front row seat, he took a long leak
And I went teary eyed.

Canít deny
I was bubbling with joy, thinking thatís my boy
Chief of any pack,
But she stole my Gizmo
And I need him back.

The audience gasped when he clocked me
Cause he tripped up Bert and busted free,
He leapt to my arms with a mighty jump
Nibbling my ear and wagging his stump,
My thieving ex, was well perplexed
As a camera zoomed in,
Millions could see. Gizzyís love for me
And my love for him.

And I thought
When we hit the street Iíll score a rawhide treat
At the pet shack,
Cause she stole my Gizmo
But Iíll have him back

Judy declared things were cut and dried
Saying Gizmo belongs right by my side
Bert needed surgery on both his knees
But he sued Judy and got seventy gees.
I heard last week, she married her geek
No skin of my nose,
Cause I get my kicks. teaching Gizmo tricks
And Judge Judy shows.

Many wise men tell, allís well that ends well
Canít argue with that
Cause she stole my Gizmo
But I got him back.

Last edited by John Paragreen; 10/10/18 03:45 PM.

please vist
to hear my lyrics recorded by musicians world wide
#1145286 - 10/10/18 04:47 PM Re: She Stole My Gizmo [Re: John Paragreen]  
Joined: May 2017
Posts: 571
Gavin Sinclair Offline
Top 500 Poster
Gavin Sinclair  Offline
Top 500 Poster

Joined: May 2017
Posts: 571
Conover, North Carolina, USA
I enjoyed reading that. Funny and cute. It's long, of course, but would be good performed live in a bar.

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