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#1144013 - 08/19/18 08:09 PM In My Room  
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 1,081
joro Offline
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joro  Offline
Top 500 Poster

Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 1,081
Massachusetts,USA
Been quite a while since I have posted something. Please let me know what you think.
In My Room
In My Room Joe Rogier 2018
Verse 1
She was a golden haired beauty
An angel in disguise
At first glance, she drew me in
With her cocoa colored eyes
We would talk the hours away
And then hold each other tight
When we managed to escape
To that place of our delight
Chorus
In my room
We would play
In my room
Night and day
In my room, in my room, in my room
Verse 2
I don't know, what went wrong
But, you've heard this all before
Just another love lost song
Written on a tear stained floor
Maybe I'll figure it out
But then again, maybe no
Until then, without a doubt
I gotta let it go
Chorus
Verse 3
Nice guys always finish last
Or so I have been told
It's better to have loved and lost
I've learned as I grow old
Maybe she will think of me
But, I must confess
Life has no guarantees
I'll remeber none the less
Chorus

#1144175 - 08/25/18 05:06 PM Re: In My Room [Re: joro]  
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 1,081
joro Offline
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joro  Offline
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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 1,081
Massachusetts,USA
I guess it sucks

#1144177 - 08/25/18 07:41 PM Re: In My Room [Re: joro]  
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,296
Dave Rice Offline
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Dave Rice  Offline
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,296
Texas
Hi JORO:

Thanks for sharing. Sorry our "ranks" seem to be shrinking... and weekends are usually the worst time to post a song. Everyone is escaping from their jobs... or school, etc. The song has possibilities and you sang it well. For what it's worth... I would find something to alternate or compliment the phrase, "In my room" 'cause it seems to be repeated much to often to keep the listener engaged. My purpose is only to provide you with one old man's feedback... and judging by your video... you are younger than me, LOL!

I remember the other songs you posted and know you have the talent needed for success.

Regards,

----Dave

#1144193 - 08/26/18 03:42 AM Re: In My Room [Re: Dave Rice]  
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 1,081
joro Offline
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joro  Offline
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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 1,081
Massachusetts,USA
Thanks Dave
I think the hook is used a little too much as well. I am going in to the studio to record this properly and will def whittle the hook.
I appreciate you taking the time to listen and comment. I am guilty of not being an active member myself and should realize that people are scarce here now.
Thanks again Dave

#1144194 - 08/26/18 05:00 AM Re: In My Room [Re: joro]  
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 19,747
Calvin Offline
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Calvin  Offline
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Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 19,747
Okeechobee, Florida U.S.A.
Hello Joro,


I really enjoyed THIS line............With her cocoa colored eyes

Looking forward to your next version.
Have a good day.


Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

#1144253 - 08/27/18 12:25 AM Re: In My Room [Re: joro]  
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 1,081
joro Offline
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joro  Offline
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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 1,081
Massachusetts,USA
Thanks Calvin! I like that line too smile


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