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#1139478 04/10/18 03:01 PM
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https://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=13712118

Lol, this one has gone through many incarnations, I never really settled in on THE lyric or THE melody, although people( all 9 of them) seem to like it,

But turns out a buddy who makes a financial podcast, likes the music, and wants to use it on his podcast, maybe with me voicing over an intro until he begins the shiw.

Hey, never throw out a song. It could earn you several dollars!

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 04/10/18 03:02 PM.
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Hey there,ya have some smooth vocals going on.I'm liking this one.Great job. Mike

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Nice work. Vocals, write, arrangement...everything.

The mix sounds spot on the monitors.

Kudos!

J&B


Check out our new album Janice Merritt "Am I Blue Enough?"
on Spotify, Apple Music, Pandora, Amazon and others.
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I was interested to see your "material" posted and was impressed with every aspect. Bud said everything I had planned to say... and Bud knows of what he speaks! Thanks for sharing that with us... and I agree, the things we create (no matter how insignificant they may seem to us at that moment) should never be discarded. If nothing else, they provide us a "point of reference" to the progress we make... or the lack of it. Music... and all the elements associated with it (including lyrics if it happens to be a song) reflect an ever-changing art-form. ----Dave

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fd,

An enjoyable listen. A lot of nice pop melody things happening throughout that keep it interesting. A nice write.

The staccato guitar on one side and the strum on the other is a nice balance.

I like it.

fj

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Hey FD,

I love everything about this song as well, nice and crisp, performance right on! Also well arranged & balanced. Love the vocals and the melody.

steady-eddie

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Mike, Janice and Bud, Dave, Floyd, Steady Eddie, thanks for listening and the comments.

It was one of the few recordings that I was ever satisfied with, it just mixed well, and worked. I used magix software to record, I like the traditional eq knobs on that software, I find it easier to mix that way,

The bass was pretty bad sounding, it was a midi font bass, but I managed to eq it and compress to decency.

Yeah, I spent many hours mixing it, and I was happy with a recording for a change, thanks for all the positive feedback. Funny how some songs come out good and others don't.

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 04/11/18 01:46 AM.
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Fdemetrio,

This is a cool, slick listen. Love the guitar work—an ear worm that keeps pulling at you, and the hook on those “high and low’ harmonies are very sweet. Got a nice 80s feel to this, but fresh and relevant. Loved this. Well done!

Best regards,

Deej

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Thanks Dee. I can write pop I guess, even though I hate most pop radio songs lol

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I like the overall vibe here.
Feels a bit like a Sting .. Bono mash up... in a very cool vibrant sense.
Great energy in your performance, just draws you in from the jump.

Excellent work

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Thanks Nelson, I don't think I started out thinking I''d write an 80's piece, it just worked out that way., lol

Sting and Bono certainly works for me. Thanks for listening and commenting

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Hello FD,


You sure got a smooth/cool jam going on here.
IMPRESSIVE VOCAL !


Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/valvinstewart

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Thanks Calvin, I like smooth and cool!

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Good one.
Not too overproduced which is unusual in pop.

Vic


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If, given time, a monkey can write the complete works of Shakespeare maybe there's hope for me.

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A nice balance good melody vocal as production.My only not put the lyrics up!
Cheers
Travis


We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Thanks Vic, I'm not capable of over producing anything, lol, but not interested in doing so anyway. Thanks for listening.

Travis, I didn't post the lyrics, one, cause I may be using the track only, and two, I never really settled in on it, I improvised about 80 % of it as I was recording, didn't even write them down. But I can write them if you want, might be interesting to see how the structure played out. I know I was going for whole vowels at the end of each line. It's much different writing to a track

A Daydream Night

That movie still runs through my brain
The one where everybody goes insane
The feel good part where no one feels no pain
And I go, High and Low
I don't know, where I go
But it's somewhere slow....

And it don't have a name
But it's thunder road and born to run like fame
Girl look at me cause two can play this game
Yeah let's go, High and Low
I don't know, where we'll go
We'll put on a show

If seein is believin
Then we're doing something right
That dress you'll be wearin's lookin out of sight
Let's have a daydream night

Hey Gina,
I know it's been one tough week
People Bitchin, phone stuck to your cheek
And where's the thanks
That raise been lookin bleak
Yeah let's go, High and Low
I don't know, where we'll go
We'll put on a show

If seein is believin
Then we're doing something right
That dress you'll be wearin's lookin out of sight
Let's have a daydream night


Last edited by Fdemetrio; 04/20/18 02:03 AM.
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Dude! Nicely done...really enjoyed my listen.

Ricki

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Very catchy and melodic. Excellent vocals! That hook will stick around as an ear worm.


Colin

I try to critique as if you mean business.....

http://colinwardmusic.com/

http://rosewoodcreekband.com/


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That is catchy!

Nice Springsteen reference - makes me think these are like the characters in Born to Run - a few years further down the road. smile

Love the harmonies and the mix. Nice vocal too - you really sell that high note at the end!

Scott

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Ricki, Colin, Scott, nice to impress some good writers like yourselves.

I actually think this is a B side, need a smash A side to compliment!

Have a few of those, recording it right is the tough part.

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 04/22/18 10:52 PM.
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I couldn't sleep so I just listened to this.
You had me in the intro and the rest is just as good.
Is that you singing....LOVE THIS!

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Thanks Barry, ya me singing. Have you seen a picture of my wife and kids?

Lollllllll

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Nope never saw them...

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Very smooth! Loved the very hooky guitar, though felt it was a touch loud in the mix and overshadowed, at times, a very very good vocal. Maybe a bit of reverb on it, to make it sit in the mix a bit better could help too. Interestingly, I am the only person that has listened to this that thought the guitar was a bit too up front, so take it for what its' worth. That being said, I love what that guitar is doing. A great rhythm. Excellent pop tune. It kind of has a yacht rock feel for me. Very catchy!.

Dave

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Thanks my man Gocart, I could play with the levels a bit more, I thought of this more as a side project, I think the performance trumps the song, but I can do pop if backed up against the wall.... Lol

Thanks for the ears and comments

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 05/24/18 04:58 PM.
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Awesome I was reading this is your mixing awesome I struggle every time and still cant find nothing this sweet

Anthony

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Thanks lyricwriter, im not the greatest recording engineer either. It's very subjective, moreso than songs themselves. The person mixing it has to assume everybody who listens to it hears it the way they do.

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A good catchy number! I enjoyed the listen.
Good sound, best of luck with it.
Travis


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Hey Fdemetrio,

A great pop tune my friend. I listened a couple of times over, and it has a great vibe, and as you write well, I will comment on the production.

Overall great, but my one big ask is that you get someone to treat your vocals. They are thin as compared to the rest, and need booth boosting and placement within the piece.

There's nothing wrong with the vocal line, it just needs proper engineering to get it to soar, which it does naturally.

All the best. Great tune.

cheers, niteshift

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Thanks Travis and Niteshift.

Nite, I think I may have mixed the vocals so they would be heard. It's kind of busy In the verses. Yeah remastering and remixing would be a great idea.

"Ahh but my song was so much older then, It's younger than that now"

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 05/26/18 10:46 AM.
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Hey there Fdemetrio .....I love the music, here....and that melody is GREAT. Melodic hook is strong. The rhythm is hypnotic.
The lyrics only need another "go thru" IMHO.
GREAT song you have here.....and your performance is really good.
Good stuff!
-Tom

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Hey Ironknee, didn't see your reply sooner.

Thanks for listening. As far as lyrics, there is not alot you can do lyrically with this the way it's structured.

You have to cram the lyric in with the short bursts of melody, all u can do is have a hook and some lines, nice title.... i think it's enough, but I'm not claiming greatness on these lyrics, it was more about the sound of e words, and making it fit the melody.

Sometimes when I write a lyric, the problem becomes, making the song singable and memorable , because when you write your lyric first, it's not musical. Here I had the track and a hook, and then filled in the rest.

Becomes a trade off, if u want a catchy pop song, your not gonna get much lyric to work with.

I think it's a pretty good song overall, I can and have done better.

But thx for taking the time out for a spin and a comment.


Last edited by Fdemetrio; 06/17/18 12:16 AM.
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Good tune all around!...I can see that background music coming in handy for a podcast, but I hope they don't throw away the good melody and vocal

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Thanks James...

I'm actually surprised a lot of people like this. I'm not sure if they are responding to the sentiment or the performance. Most of the melody and lyric was improvised. I had an idea of the three sections, and a rough melodic idea, but then I just recorded vocals over it, nearly all improvised.

I guess it bodes well knowing I can entertain people with minimal effort.

Maybe that's what the guy saw in the track. He used just the track in his podcast, I had a version without the vocal. I filled in lyrics to match the vibe of the track.

But I'm glad you think it's worth preserving.

Last edited by Fdemetrio; 07/02/18 05:03 PM.
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I really enjoyed this, especially the vocals. Scott mentioned the Springsteen references - I think the lyric actually has a Springsteen feel to it beyond those references in the way that it all makes perfect sense in a weirdly non-specific way. That's a compliment, in case it wasn't clear LOL..

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Yea Gavin, I think you must be a big Springsteen fan too, to hear and see all that.

Yep, the song is about transcendence, which he has so many songs about cars and going somewhere else, mine is more about dreaming your way there, but in a much more watered down pop way.

And yep, the guitar hook is similar to I'm on fire, and the phrasing and vocal style is influenced.

But all this is making me want to do this again.

Appreciate the input and ears!

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Lovely stuff. Just drifted away on the groove and the quality of the vocals. Lyric is well done, but I think it's the music that drives this one.

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Thanks Rainyday.

I'm in the process of reworking this.


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