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____THE ISLE OF EVERFREE. ( THE LATEST WRITE)
We'd set a course following the sun Started to snow when our journey begun Donated our clothes and things we won't use Sailed free from bad news and attitudes
V We'd food and water to last many days guitar n' mandolin to pass time away Renamed our boat the Lovely Abigail she dipped raised and smiled as she sailed
C Bound for an Island called Everfree it's not on any chart, never will be It's a secret Isle that nobody knows magic Isle of Everfree with sands of silver and gold V Hoped to drop anchor by Christmas Day. Abie gave me a card that she'd made Soft salty kisses as we danced on waves. I'll remember that moment always B A thunder storm blew up in the night the sea was angry but come daylight The sun appeared the ocean grew calm as our Island came into sight, on that Christmas morn
V Palm trees,fresh water, if we want fIsh for tea theres enough for our needs out in the sea We could build a home high in the trees like the Swiss Family Robinson on Everfree
C
And it's Christmas Day and we're forever free_________ ___________________________________
THE ISLE OF EVERFREE ( REWRITE) V Started to snow when our journey begun we'd set a course following the sun Donated our city clothes and shoes gave a high five, raised a glass or two
V We'd food and water to last many days guiitar n' mandolin would pass time away Boat was built to temper most gales dipped and raised as she sailed C Bound for an Island called Everfree it's not on any chart, never will be It's a secret Isle that nobody knows magic Isle of Everfree with sands of silver and gold V Hoped to drop anchor by Christmas Day. She gave me a card that she'd made A soft salty kiss as we danced on a wave. I'll remember that moment always B Storm blew up last night now it's so calm secured the boat just before dawn Threw our arms around each other took in the sights where we'd sleep under the stars that night V There's palm trees,fresh water and fIsh for our tea on our uncharted island called Everfree ..where lifes determined at our own pace no traffic jams, crowded streets no rat race C
And it's Christmas Day and we're forever free
------------'----------------------- ThE ISLE OF EVERFREE ( REWRITE) V We set sail on a cold December morn determined to weather any storm We'd food and water to last for days guitar, 'n' mandolin, penny whistle to play V Set a course following the sun stated to snow when our journey begun Cast off sober suits and sensible shoes for songs under the stars, wine that she brewed C Bound for an Island called Everfree it's not on a charts and never will be It's a secret Isle that nobody knows magic Isle of Everfree with it's sands of gold V We hoped to drop anchor by Christmas Day sang seasonal carols most of the way She gave me a Christmas card she made returned soft salty kisses as we danced on a wave
V
Secured the boat we sailed in at dawn blew a gale last night but now it's so calm There's palm trees,fresh water fish for tea on our uncharted island we'll call Everfree C
And it's Christmas Day and we're forever free
-----''--'--------'--------------'--------------
We set sail on a cold December morn enough determination to weather any storm We'd food and water to last us many days guitar, a mandolin, an old penny whistle to play
We set a course following the sun stated to snow when our journey begun Relieved to cast off sober suits and shoes sang songs under the stars, drank the wine she brewed
Bound for an Island called Everfree it's not on any charts and never will be It's a secret Isle that nobody knows The magic Isle of Everfree with it's sands of gold
We hoped to drop anchor by Christmas Day sang seasonal carols most of the way She gave me a Christmas card that she made gave her soft salty kisses as we danced on a wave
Secured the boat we sailed in at dawn blew a gale last night but now it's so calm There's palm trees,fresh water fish for tea on our uncharted secret island we'll call Everfree
And it's Christmas Day and we're forever free
Last edited by Travis david; 01/29/18 11:38 AM.
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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I like that. Can I come too?
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Thanks Ronnie sorry no tourists lol Travis
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Hearing Jimmy Buffett music.
I changed a bit...k or s
We set sail on a December morn Determined to weather any storm Enough food and water to last many days guitar, 'n' mandolin, penny whistle to play
Leaving the snow that had just begun We set our course following the sun Glad to cast off down coats and snow boots sang under the stars, drank the wine she brewed
Bound for Island Everfree Not on any charts and never will be A secret oasis lost at sea The magic Island Everfree
We hoped to drop anchor by Christmas Day sang seasonal carols most of the way She gave me a Christmas card that she made gave her salt spray kisses as we danced on a wave
Bound for Island Everfree Not on any charts and never will be A secret oasis lost at sea The magic Island Everfree
~B Blew a gale last night but now it's all calm Secured the boat in the red sky of dawn There's palm trees, fish, fresh water for tea on our uncluttered island we've named Everfree
Bound for Island Everfree Not on any charts and never will be A secret oasis lost at sea The magic Island Everfree
It's Christmas Day and we're forever free
Last edited by Neil Cotton; 01/17/18 09:27 PM.
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Thanks Neil appreciate your take I'll consider it later for a rewrite
Last edited by Travis david; 01/18/18 07:40 AM.
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Yes! (made me daydream for a bit!) A couple of picky bits: Didn't like V2 2nd line because I didn't think you needed to mention snow and also it feels like the word should be "began" Extra picky: to my knowledge wine isn't "brewed" (I'll be quick to apologize if in error) I don't think Christmas is a good choice-it makes me think of a carol and this isn't going there. "fresh water fish for tea" threw me for a second. (Earl Grey) I know some Brits can be eccentric, but that's a bit much! Then I remembered "tea" as supper from years of watching Corrie. What's for afters? All in all a pleasant one Travis, best of luck! -Mike
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Maybe it's an English thing Mike we say brewed but I have changed it to beer. Cheers. The snow set the picture leaving on a winters day heading for the sun. Thanks for comments Travis
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Another rewrite change or two Travis
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Hearing Jimmy Buffett music.
I changed a bit...k or s
We set sail on a December morn Determined to weather any storm Enough food and water to last many days guitar, 'n' mandolin, penny whistle to play
Leaving the snow that had just begun We set our course following the sun Glad to cast off down coats and snow boots sang under the stars, drank the wine she brewed
Bound for Island Everfree Not on any charts and never will be A secret oasis lost at sea The magic Island Everfree
We hoped to drop anchor by Christmas Day sang seasonal carols most of the way She gave me a Christmas card that she made gave her salt spray kisses as we danced on a wave
Bound for Island Everfree Not on any charts and never will be A secret oasis lost at sea The magic Island Everfree
~B Blew a gale last night but now it's all calm Secured the boat in the red sky of dawn There's palm trees, fresh water, fish for tea on our uncluttered island we've named Everfree
Bound for Island Everfree Not on any charts and never will be A secret oasis lost at sea The magic Island Everfree
It's Christmas Day and we're forever free
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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I've heard of Buffet but never listened to his songs Neil I've added a bridge and altered the last verse too Travis
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Hi Travis,
This is a great one to read right now, late at night...a good story and some adventure! I enjoyed it. One thing, this line: "on our uncharted island we'll call Everfree". Everfree is already established so "we'll call Everfree" sounds like they're just naming it now. Also, there's 3 lines dedicated to Christmas in the third verse...maybe the Christmas card line could involve the waves or something to enhance the dancing they do? Just a thought. Good stuff!
Kristi
A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be ultimately at peace with himself. What a man can be, he must be. -- Abraham Maslow, American Psychologist
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Good points Kristi both addressed Thanks for your suggestions Travis
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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I've heard of Buffet but never listened to his songs Neil I've added a bridge and altered the last verse too Travis wow, haven't heard his songs? surely Margarittaville. I'm recording a full album of his style in the next few months.
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i prefer your original to the newest
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You can't please everyone lol I don't think its going to go anywhere from here. I enjoyed writing it though. I'll have a listen to Buffet. Used to get the odd single in my shop on Imports. Don't think he ever hit our charts though
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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I
I'm a keen a amateur- this is the master
I"m sailing down the summer wind I got whiskers on my chin And I like the mood I'm in As I while away the time of day In the lee of Christian Island Tall and strong she dips and reels I call her Silver Heels And she tells me how she feels She's a good old boat and she'll stay afloat Through the toughest gales and keep smilin' But for one more day she would like to stay In the lee of Christian Island I'm sailing down the summer day Where the fish and seagulls play I put my troubles all away And when the gales comes up I'll fill my cup With the whiskey of the Highlands She's a good old ship and she'll make the trip From the lee of Christian Island Tall and strong she slips along I sing for her a song And she leans into the wind She's a good old boat and she'll stay afloat Through the toughest gales and keep smilin' When the summer ends we will rest again In the lee of Christian Island
Songwriters: Gordon Lightfoot
Last edited by Travis david; 01/20/18 05:04 PM.
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Travis,
I'm not sure where to chime in here . . . can't quite distinguish which is the revision and which the original. That said, I like most the first two verses in the version furthest down (does that make sense?), though there are aspects of the other versions that are intriguing. I wouldn't give up on this one just yet--put it aside, if anything, and revisit a bit down the line. I think this one has some potential.
All the best,
Deej
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Hi Deej The more recent writes are generally put over the top of the older take. So it's the first one you read Don't know if this will go further but I appreciate your comments Tranis
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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This is the latest rewrite
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Hi Travis. Nothing wrong with dreaming, eh? Just a thought but I looked up the meaning of the name Abigail and the results were "a beautiful woman" or "a servant". Not sure if you knew that but thought it could be mentioned in the song. We renamed our boat the Abigail A beautiful servant in full sail We'd food and water to last many days guitar n' mandolin to pass time away
Vic
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When I first saw the title I felt it could fit in with the upcoming St. Patrick's Day contest, that it was something with a possible Celtic flavor. Then you referenced Jimmy Buffet and notice three or four rewrites of the same piece. Good song nonetheless. Perhaps the thought for the day I posted in an earlier response could apply here as well: Delight in the senses – eat something delicious, inhale intoxicating fragrances, take a moment to appreciate the beauty around you.
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Thanks Brian I appreciate your observations and comments Travis
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Hi Vic Thanks for researching and take its not finished yet soi will return to your ideas Travjohn
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Vic gave me cause for thought and I have adapted an idea he gave on verse 2 Thanks Vic Travis
Last edited by Travis david; 01/26/18 07:56 AM.
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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OK you got me, I have to ask...what is fIsh for tea
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Lol a meal we working class enjoy round about 5pm to 6pm.The middle-class or those with aspirations of joining them refer to it as dinner
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Swapped the first two lines of verse one around And altered the last line of that verse Travis
Last edited by Travis david; 01/29/18 11:38 AM.
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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A sailors dream no doubt.
Just a writer of words
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Thanks Alan
The melody has been done and the song should be on the forum in a couple of months Travis
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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