8 members (Bill Draper, Gary E. Andrews, Fdemetrio, Perry Neal Crawford, Guy E. Trepanier, couchgrouch, Sunset Poet, 1 invisible),
815
guests, and
225
robots. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
Welcome to the Just Plain Folks forums! You are currently viewing our forums as a Guest which gives you limited access to most of our discussions and to other features.
By joining our free community you will have access to post and respond to topics, communicate privately with our users (PM), respond to polls, upload content, and access many other features. Registration is fast, simple, and absolutely free; so please join our community today!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Mutlu
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/15/24 07:08 PM
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 134
Serious Contributor
|
OP
Serious Contributor
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 134 |
The devil may tread
Don't like those days that end in a Y pain in my head I so wanna cry I thought today I'd wake up dead I've been to places the devil won't tread
one more drink and I'll be okay thats what I tell myself to say just one nip to keep out the cold its a story that many have told
oh these lies no-one believes even myself I can't deceive just one more til the bottles done another day that the devils won
tomorrows just another day another bottle in the same old way maybe then I'll wake up dead in a place where the devil may tread
CopyrightAlanEvans29012017
Just a writer of words
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 4,909
Top 50 Poster
|
Top 50 Poster
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 4,909 |
A common theme in country music...it's good, not great...because it is common, look for a new way of saying it...maybe in story with details.
Or keep as is. The music may make it killer.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 12,264 Likes: 4
Top 10 Poster
|
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 12,264 Likes: 4 |
Quite a good story. I'd drop the wake up dead line it's been done to death.
Travis
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 19,580 Likes: 13
Top 10 Poster
|
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 19,580 Likes: 13 |
Hi Alan,
Welcome to JPF. I wanted to let you know that I spread your lyric posts out over all 3 lyric boards as is our rule. Though there's no limit to what you can post, if you are hoping for feedback the rule of thumb is to leave critiques on 5 other peoples lyrics for each one you post. It's not a rule, but it's a respectful thing to do if you hope others to spend time on your lyric, you should do the same first for others. If you don't you may find you won't get many comments on yours, especially when posting large numbers. However if you give 5 critiques per lyric posted by you you'll likely do well no matter how many you post. It is all about fairness and showing people you're willing to give, not just take.
Welcome aboard,
Brian
Brian Austin Whitney Founder Just Plain Folks jpfolkspro@gmail.com Skype: Brian Austin Whitney Facebook: www.facebook.com/justplainfolks"Don't sit around and wait for success to come to you... it doesn't know the way." -Brian Austin Whitney "It's easier to be the bigger man when you actually are..." -Brian Austin Whitney "Sometimes all you have to do to inspire humans to greatness is to give them a reason and opportunity to do something great." -Brian Austin Whitney
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 134
Serious Contributor
|
OP
Serious Contributor
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 134 |
Thanks for that, I did notice that they had moved, I was confused when reading that it said everything would be moving to forum three so I just went there directly. I did already leave comments on other peoples work the first day that I came on here so I am aware of the give and take procedure. Having said that thanks for the welcome friend.
Just a writer of words
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 19,580 Likes: 13
Top 10 Poster
|
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 19,580 Likes: 13 |
Thanks for that, I did notice that they had moved, I was confused when reading that it said everything would be moving to forum three so I just went there directly. I did already leave comments on other peoples work the first day that I came on here so I am aware of the give and take procedure. Having said that thanks for the welcome friend. Alan, you're posting tons and tons of lyrics and I am not seeing the 5 critiques from you for each one you post. Few if any will respond to your lyrics with the tactic you are taking plus to make it worse, you're pushing recent lyric posts by others down the page before people check them out which is a double whammy. In the 20 years we've had this board no one has been abusive in terms of overposting lyrics. So going forward I will ask you nicely to halt posting any additional lyrics until you are critiquing others more often than posting your own. I suggested 5 of your critiques per one lyric posted, but I don't think you've even doing 1 to 1 at this point. I realize you are new, but we've never had to set "rules" because no one has ever abused the situation before to this degree and I would rather not have to start now. And lets be frank, if no one posts a response, you're getting nothing out of it anyway. Would you rather post a few and get some feedback first? Otherwise it's just an Alan Jack library and that's not going to do anyone any good. You learn more by critiquing others lyrics than you learn from receiving feedback because writers rarely see the same mistakes in their own work they can easily point out in others work. But with a lot of practice, you can get better at it on future lyrics as you write them which is what lyric critiques are mostly useful for, to help the next lyric you write so you can avoid past mistakes you or someone else has made. Thanks, Brian
Brian Austin Whitney Founder Just Plain Folks jpfolkspro@gmail.com Skype: Brian Austin Whitney Facebook: www.facebook.com/justplainfolks"Don't sit around and wait for success to come to you... it doesn't know the way." -Brian Austin Whitney "It's easier to be the bigger man when you actually are..." -Brian Austin Whitney "Sometimes all you have to do to inspire humans to greatness is to give them a reason and opportunity to do something great." -Brian Austin Whitney
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 134
Serious Contributor
|
OP
Serious Contributor
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 134 |
Hi I just wanted to get those out there and today I will find the time to catch up on others work I do understand the system although didn't realise that you wanted the critiques at the same time as posting. I thought that I could do that over a few days doing a few at a time, but it makes no never mind to me and now that I know what it is you want I will get on with it, sorry if I have offended anyone that was not my intention. Also was not planning on putting more lyrics on for a while, just wanted to put those out there. If you feel that there are to many feel free to remove some of them.
Regards
Alan
Just a writer of words
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 19,580 Likes: 13
Top 10 Poster
|
Top 10 Poster
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 19,580 Likes: 13 |
Thanks for understanding. I think you can be a very positive part of the community, I just needed to put the brakes on before it went too far south. I look forward to your participation and checking out more of your work!
Continued success, Brian
Brian Austin Whitney Founder Just Plain Folks jpfolkspro@gmail.com Skype: Brian Austin Whitney Facebook: www.facebook.com/justplainfolks"Don't sit around and wait for success to come to you... it doesn't know the way." -Brian Austin Whitney "It's easier to be the bigger man when you actually are..." -Brian Austin Whitney "Sometimes all you have to do to inspire humans to greatness is to give them a reason and opportunity to do something great." -Brian Austin Whitney
|
|
|
We would like to keep the membership in Just Plain Folks FREE! Your donation helps support the many programs we offer including Road Trips and the Music Awards.
|
|
Forums117
Topics125,754
Posts1,161,305
Members21,470
|
Most Online37,523 Jan 25th, 2020
|
|
"When will we all, as artists, creators and facilitators learn that the so-called experts in our lives are nothing more than someone who has stepped forward and called themselves an expert?" –Brian Austin Whitney
|
|
There are no members with birthdays on this day. |
|
|
|