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Foray
by Fdemetrio - 04/23/24 12:11 AM
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Joined: Jul 2013
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Hi, Y'all. Been a while since I've posted here, though I have popped in to read some stuff now and again... Since my buddy David Snyder has been causing a bit of a ruckus, I thought I'd throw something up against the wall. This is a recent production of a song from a couple of years back.. I'll be back later to catch up on some listening to what is being posted... FOREVER'S NOT AS LONG AS IT USED TO BE
there's a picture on the wall that still tears me apart of you and me inside a lipstick heart "everlasting love" - your favorite shade of red "this means forever" - that's what you said forever's not as long as it used to be if it was you would still be here with me you promised me that - i took you at your word did it end a little early - i hadn't heard i thought that it was farther than anyone could see but it seems like forever's not as long as it was to be... it's not something that you say at the drop of a hat "i'll love you forever" can't be taken back you swore it was true - even crossed your heart so tell me where does the end of forever start repeat chorus did enternity finally wind down has the world simply stopped spinning around repeat chorus Comments welcome. Thanks for listening. floyd
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Good to see and hear you back, Floyd. Great lyric too.
Vic
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This is a great song. With an even better hook. If I was your producer, and I''m not, I would see what it sounded like without the vibrato in the voice. It would to me be even more Alan Jackson ish an honest sounding.
I with I could mix and produce it again. There is so much good stuff in there.
I hope you don't find that too brash and pretentious.
:Ron
Last edited by RonnieDean; 02/04/18 06:49 PM.
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Well Floyd, Since you are a good buddy and all, I would like to tell ya about a time I tuned my guitar. I am sure you would be impressed. I tuned the bottom string to a D. No one ever thought of that before me. Then as I gazed up at the sky, it occurred to me, no one had ever ever written a song as great as me because I was the greatest. They could dream, Floyd, but they could just not be me. Because well, the entire west coast of the United States was not big enough to fill up my head. Then, just as as soon as I had seen that my post about myself had gone on to 10 pages, I accidentally pushed the wrong button and heard this song by YOU. Of ALL PEOPLE! In my own back yard!!!!! And I thought. Dang. Someone else in the world besides me can write a song. Only one, mind you, but at least one is one and that is too much! Well, I do have to admit you sound like you might have spent some time in the Big Town, but this Town is only big enough for one of us Mr. Jane. So prepare to draw!!!! Welcome to JPF Buddy!!!!!!!!!! The saloon is that way. Yeah that way. BUT SERIOUSLY. Good song my brother. I'll call ya tomorrow with a co-write idea. It will only be one sentence but I am sure you will have it done by the the end of the day. Gotta run bro.
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Hi Floyd.
A craftsman with a shining example of your craft and a most helpful and encouraging one also.
Cheers.
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Welcome Home, Floyd:
You've been missed. That familiar vocal worked perfectly on yet another of your super songs. Thanks for sharing and hurry back every chance you get. ----Dave
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Great song Floyd. I like the lyrics especially this line" forever's not as long as it used to be" Great stuff! Travis
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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You're always good Floyd. Nice song.
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Good to see and hear you back, Floyd. Great lyric too.
Vic Thank, Vic. This is a great song. With an even better hook. If I was your producer, and I''m not, I would see what it sounded like without the vibrato in the voice. It would to me be even more Alan Jackson ish an honest sounding.
I with I could mix and produce it again. There is so much good stuff in there.
I hope you don't find that too brash and pretentious.
:Ron
Ronnie - I've not had anyone complain about "vibrato" before (or even mention for that matter). I sing how I sing - that won't change. And likely, Alan won't be singing thisone either. Sorry you don't care for the production or mix either. There are two more version of the same song at the bottom of this page http://floydjane.com/Songs/Forever.htm....though I sang those, too... and mixed and produced them, as well... so they may not float your boat either. Other than that, glad you like the song. Well Floyd, Since you are a good buddy and all, I would like to tell ya about a time I tuned my guitar. I am sure you would be impressed. I tuned the bottom string to a D. No one ever thought of that before me. Then as I gazed up at the sky, it occurred to me, no one had ever ever written a song as great as me because I was the greatest. They could dream, Floyd, but they could just not be me. Because well, the entire west coast of the United States was not big enough to fill up my head. Then, just as as soon as I had seen that my post about myself had gone on to 10 pages, I accidentally pushed the wrong button and heard this song by YOU. Of ALL PEOPLE! In my own back yard!!!!! And I thought. Dang. Someone else in the world besides me can write a song. Only one, mind you, but at least one is one and that is too much! Well, I do have to admit you sound like you might have spent some time in the Big Town, but this Town is only big enough for one of us Mr. Jane. So prepare to draw!!!! Welcome to JPF Buddy!!!!!!!!!! The saloon is that way. Yeah that way. BUT SERIOUSLY. Good song my brother. I'll call ya tomorrow with a co-write idea. It will only be one sentence but I am sure you will have it done by the the end of the day. Gotta run bro. Did someone say beer? Or whiskey? Set 'em up, barkeep... My guitar was in tune when I bought it. Welcome? Hey! I was here first! Later.... Hi Floyd.
A craftsman with a shining example of your craft and a most helpful and encouraging one also.
Cheers.
Thanks, Richard...appreciate it... Welcome Home, Floyd:
You've been missed. That familiar vocal worked perfectly on yet another of your super songs. Thanks for sharing and hurry back every chance you get. ----Dave Thanks, Dave... good to see you (that song of yours with Mike is awesome!)
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Hi Floyd, Good to see you! And hear you.. Love your voice and it's magic on this song. Very poignant, and the cleverness of the title is tempered by the humility of the singer elsewhere, making the phrase "forever's not as long as it used to be" just the singer's way of lifting himself up a little from his potential depression over his situation, by using a little sarcasm directed mostly at himself and situation. That's brilliant in setting tone, and you are a master at that. Every line feels just right. The production is sweetly sad and perfect for the lyric. Great work, I enjoyed this very much. Mike
Last edited by Michael Zaneski; 02/05/18 12:16 PM.
Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice Fortune depends on the tone of your voice
-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon) from the song "Songs of Love" from the album "Casanova" (1996)
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This feels like it should get cut. One of those lyrical hooks that make you bang your head against the wall and ask how no one came up with that before now. And a lot of craft in the rest of the lyric too. Nice one, Floyd. Scott
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Very nice .... great lyrics and the song moves along nicely. Solid, understated production that supports the song rather than crowding.
Well done, enjoyed the listen.
Kevin
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Joined: Oct 2017
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Floyd,
The theme here represents a more of a loss than a typical breakup song. I like that it is written from a guy’s perspective. The image of the photo in the red lipstick heart leaves a lasting impression.
The rhythm of the melody sounds natural and fits the words well. The lengthening and shortening of various words helps to tell the story. The rise and fall of the melody pitches work well to bring out important words.
The chords on the verse do a good job of building some anticipation by avoiding the D chord. Then when you hit the D chord at the beginning of the chorus, I knew we were in the main statement of the song. The faster chord movement here made for a nice contrast with the verse. I thought it was good to use these chords to setup the song in the intro.
Hanging onto the A chord as you held onto the word “long” made for a nice effect and a key point in the song. Going to the F# minor for the first time on the bridge helped to give a feeling of searching for an answer or being confused and distraught like the lyrics are saying. Good to start bringing the cello in here to help make it the high point of the song. You could maybe experiment with adding even a bit more sound somehow in this section.
I liked the length of the chorus. I found myself wanting the other sections to be a bit longer as well. However, I realize that you have to watch your total running time, depending on what your use of the song is. I could hear another phrase or two on the front side of the existing verses, perhaps with different chords but slow moving ones. In my opinion, the bridge could even be doubled in length. Or, you could even cut the second half of the second chorus and go straight into the bridge as-is.
Thanks for sharing a sensitive and expressive tune!
Maroon
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always a great song from you Floyd, all around good work, lyric is always impressive to me. and great vocals. Lane
"Blessed are the words of truth and fiction, one might save you from the other...Vincent
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Ah...that old Floyd Jane magic! That first verse is killer, really pulls in the listener, and vocals and production also are excellent. Thanks for sharing. You've been missed.
Ricki
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Hi Floyd,
What a lovely song! Your vocal has great longing in it. I like how you use the meaning of the word "forever" throughout. And this line gets me thinking: "so tell me where does the end of forever start" and also: "but it seems like forever's not as long as it was to be..." Oh, so sad. Good music and melody to carry these thoughts to our ears. Enjoyed it!
Kristi
A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be ultimately at peace with himself. What a man can be, he must be. -- Abraham Maslow, American Psychologist
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Floyd!
About time you show your face around here. Loved this song in all respects, especially the hook line & title! But as always, your vocals always for me are your signature sound--a good thing. (Although........ I would like a littler more "vibrato" from you.......think of "cowbell," you just can't have too much of that either)!
steady-eddie
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Floyd,
I got nothing more to offer here other than my enthusiastic support. Great vocal, nice production, stellar lyrics. “Where does the end of forever start”—killer line. I appreciate the stripped approach on production, but I think a bit more instrumentation to add depth to this might be something to consider (for example, really liked the last chorus). But I’m the last person to be chiming in on production things.
Awesome tune, Floyd. Welcome back to JPF.
All the best,
Deej
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Thanks, Calvin! Great song Floyd. I like the lyrics especially this line" forever's not as long as it used to be" Great stuff! Travis Appreciate that, Travis... You're always good Floyd. Nice song. Thanks, Martin... Hi Floyd, Good to see you! And hear you.. Love your voice and it's magic on this song. Very poignant, and the cleverness of the title is tempered by the humility of the singer elsewhere, making the phrase "forever's not as long as it used to be" just the singer's way of lifting himself up a little from his potential depression over his situation, by using a little sarcasm directed mostly at himself and situation. That's brilliant in setting tone, and you are a master at that. Every line feels just right. The production is sweetly sad and perfect for the lyric. Great work, I enjoyed this very much. Mike Mike - coming from you, that means a lot...Thank you... This feels like it should get cut. One of those lyrical hooks that make you bang your head against the wall and ask how no one came up with that before now. And a lot of craft in the rest of the lyric too. Nice one, Floyd. Scott Scott - you gotta know how much I enjoyed THAT response.... Very nice .... great lyrics and the song moves along nicely. Solid, understated production that supports the song rather than crowding.
Well done, enjoyed the listen.
Kevin Thanks for having a listen, Kevin....
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This feels like it should get cut. One of those lyrical hooks that make you bang your head against the wall and ask how no one came up with that before now. And a lot of craft in the rest of the lyric too. Nice one, Floyd. Scott I am going to just quote Scott here b/c what he said.. This made me a bit sad though. I guess there are no true promises in the here and now. Good work.
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Yeah. If this is not cut (And Floyd's other stuff is good too) we're all dead and should take up "normal" hobbies.
More evidence that the "F" doesn't stand for Folks. :-)
Last edited by RonnieDean; 02/07/18 11:02 AM.
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Floyd,
The theme here represents a more of a loss than a typical breakup song. I like that it is written from a guy’s perspective. The image of the photo in the red lipstick heart leaves a lasting impression.
The rhythm of the melody sounds natural and fits the words well. The lengthening and shortening of various words helps to tell the story. The rise and fall of the melody pitches work well to bring out important words.
The chords on the verse do a good job of building some anticipation by avoiding the D chord. Then when you hit the D chord at the beginning of the chorus, I knew we were in the main statement of the song. The faster chord movement here made for a nice contrast with the verse. I thought it was good to use these chords to setup the song in the intro.
Hanging onto the A chord as you held onto the word “long” made for a nice effect and a key point in the song. Going to the F# minor for the first time on the bridge helped to give a feeling of searching for an answer or being confused and distraught like the lyrics are saying. Good to start bringing the cello in here to help make it the high point of the song. You could maybe experiment with adding even a bit more sound somehow in this section.
I liked the length of the chorus. I found myself wanting the other sections to be a bit longer as well. However, I realize that you have to watch your total running time, depending on what your use of the song is. I could hear another phrase or two on the front side of the existing verses, perhaps with different chords but slow moving ones. In my opinion, the bridge could even be doubled in length. Or, you could even cut the second half of the second chorus and go straight into the bridge as-is.
Thanks for sharing a sensitive and expressive tune!
Maroon
Maroon - thanks for the thoughts on what you feel works here... appreciate it. Regarding the length of verses and bridges vs. chorus - that is, of course, a personal choice and often dictated by the type music we choose to do. My main focus is often "commercial Country" (in the era when that was still viable) - and there, if you have a chorus as long as this one is, you generally need to keep the verses short to balance that. If you can say all you need to say in a short verse, than you likely have a good formula. The same holds true for a bridge. If you can state your intent in 2 lines, why try to extend that to 4? You will likely dilute your write instead of enhancing it. A less-is-more kind of thing... always a great song from you Floyd, all around good work, lyric is always impressive to me. and great vocals. Lane Hi, Lane - good to see you are still around... thanks for the listen... Ah...that old Floyd Jane magic! That first verse is killer, really pulls in the listener, and vocals and production also are excellent. Thanks for sharing. You've been missed.
Ricki Well, gee, Ricki - what a nice thing to say... I appreciate that... Hi Floyd,
What a lovely song! Your vocal has great longing in it. I like how you use the meaning of the word "forever" throughout. And this line gets me thinking: "so tell me where does the end of forever start" and also: "but it seems like forever's not as long as it was to be..." Oh, so sad. Good music and melody to carry these thoughts to our ears. Enjoyed it!
Kristi
Kristi - Thanks. If you found "sad" and "listenable" at the same time, then I'd have to say that "works"... appreciate the listen... Floyd!
About time you show your face around here. Loved this song in all respects, especially the hook line & title! But as always, your vocals always for me are your signature sound--a good thing. (Although........ I would like a littler more "vibrato" from you.......think of "cowbell," you just can't have too much of that either)!
steady-eddie Hi eddie! More Cowbell! HAHAHA!!! Floyd,
I got nothing more to offer here other than my enthusiastic support. Great vocal, nice production, stellar lyrics. “Where does the end of forever start”—killer line. I appreciate the stripped approach on production, but I think a bit more instrumentation to add depth to this might be something to consider (for example, really liked the last chorus). But I’m the last person to be chiming in on production things.
Awesome tune, Floyd. Welcome back to JPF.
All the best,
Deej
Deej - thanks for the listen and the comments.... it is nice to be welcomed back, too... This feels like it should get cut. One of those lyrical hooks that make you bang your head against the wall and ask how no one came up with that before now. And a lot of craft in the rest of the lyric too. Nice one, Floyd. Scott I am going to just quote Scott here b/c what he said.. This made me a bit sad though. I guess there are no true promises in the here and now. Good work. Wendy - I do appreciate that (your song always make me "sit up and take notice"")... Yeah. If this is not cut (And Floyd's other stuff is good too) we're all dead and should take up "normal" hobbies.
More evidence that the "F" doesn't stand for Folks. :-) Ronnie - thanks for dropping back by...(and the nice comment). Getting cuts is a very "complex" formula. Marc generally covers the subject very well. It is very difficult to understand the "whole story" unless you have spent time (considerable time, actually) in Nashville and are able to "get in" to the "guts" of what is happening. The 90's and early 2000's were THE best time to do that and that "model" might very well be gone forever.
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Back by popular demand... Our Man Flint... I mean... Our Man Floyd.
Still got that smooth distinctive voice. The hand percussion is a nice touch.
The vocal harmonies are on point and overall sentiment here is beautiful.
Nicely done Floyd.
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Hey Floyd,Good to hear ya again.What a fantastic hook.I enjoyed this one a bunch. Mike
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Impeccable mr jane.
Worthy of many listens and broad attention.
J&B
Check out our new album Janice Merritt "Am I Blue Enough?" on Spotify, Apple Music, Pandora, Amazon and others.
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