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Mutlu
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/15/24 07:08 PM
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Leafs
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/05/24 01:49 PM
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steady-eddie musicWhile I'm waiting on some new instrument tracks for a new song I'm working on at present--I decided to "re-produce" this song that I collabed with Glynda Duncan about two years ago--just felt it needed a facelift. Most of these lyrics are Glynda's, though a few changes were made from me with her consent. I thought the theme of her story seemed both "sweet, yet tragic" as well--which attracted me and motivated my musical influence. Thanks Glynda! I'd also like to thank and give credit to Floyd Jane who co-produced this song and shared his production talents, and Colin Ward for his ability to "always" not just play superbly, but to capture the song's emotional flow. Comments are always welcome, especially with volumes & track pannings - but I pretty much consider this one done--for the 2nd time! You're Only Fantasy –---- g.duncan/e.swartz (Intro--piano) I’ve loved you sweet, for some time now I’m afraid, it’s just my destiny To live alone in this great big world And you're all I’d, ever need But now I realize…..that I won't gaze into your eyes You’re only fantasy I dream of you, most every night Go to sleep, with you always on my mind And waking up, with thoughts of you In real life, I'll never call you mine I guess it’s time I face reality Accept this fate this misery You're only fantasy (Chorus) I’d give most anything If I could, someday belong to you But I know that it won’t happen Cause I fell in love with you too late in my life And you'll never be my wife..... (Guitar solo with verse melody) Sometimes I think, that you're here with me I see your face so clearly Just sitting beside me, we're watching TV Then when it's time for bed Again I realize.....that I'm just living a disguise You’re only fantasy (Bridge) I wish at times I had the courage; to tell her how I really feel But the fear of being turned down; I'm not sure my heart could heal (transitional key change) Dear God if You could make my dreams come true I'd pray each day for all my life For me say that I belong to her I’d be so proud for her my wife But it's not fair for me to ask of You When so many need You more than I do She's only fantasy (Chorus) I’d give most anything If I could, someday belong to you..... But I know that it won’t happen Cause I fell in love with you, too late in my life And you'll never be my wife..... (short guitar solo--transition to end tag) It’s time to set my poor soul free, and let go..... of this.....fantasy….. (outro piano)
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When listening I noticed so many things... how difficult it is to write a song that can be sung by either a male or a female vocalist. Ed, I thought you pulled it of really well... and yes, there were a couple of spots the listener had to "work out a solution" but Glynda wrote this... and it was written from a woman's perspective. Congratulations to all of you for pulling it off so well. Gee whiz, what a talented team of folks got together on this to take it so far. I really enjoyed it... and knowing most of the individuals involved (by on-line experience only) makes it pretty darn special to me.
Getting Floyd Jane involved, Eddie, was such a good move and persuading Colin to participate with all the things he has going on... I'm impressed. Ed, I know Glynda must have been thrilled at what you did with her work. Great job all around. Loved it. ----Dave
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Eddie,
On the whole, this is very cool and close to being truly awesome. There’s something about this that reminds me of a 50’s or 60’s song—don’t know why Buddy Holly comes to mind (maybe even Roy Orbison). But anyway, I really admire the way you soften your voice in key spots on the vocal; fits so well with the tune.
A few things, IMHO, might be tweaked. First, as noted, it seems the lyrics were originally written for a female singer. But as the perspective shifts, it introduces some extra syllables that make a few lines seem rushed. Not sure that makes sense, but just how it struck my ears.
From a production standpoint, not sure I love the harmony on the chorus, in part because the point of view is one to one—e.g., a guy to a girl—so it throws me a bit. But In contrast, and for whatever reason, the harmony on the bridge works great for me. Not sure that’s helpful or is consistent, but just how I reacted as I listened.
Regarding the lyrics--and again just how it struck me on first listen--the lines in the last verse—“But it's not fair for me to ask of You / When so many need you more than I do”—were a little confusing, only because the point of view changes. In reading the lyrics, it’s more clear; but listening to it, it’s more difficult to distinguish “you” (her) from “You” (God). Though I know what you're shooting for here, maybe something to revisit.
All the above, though, is just minor stuff in the whole scheme of things. This is far beyond anything I could dream of writing and pulling together, so please take my comments for what they are worth. It’s a pretty and well done song. Enjoyed this a ton!
All the best,
Deej
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Dave, Deej,
Thanks much for all of the kind words--Dave, it was a great experience working with Floyd a while back.
I can see especially how you perceived the lyrics written for a girl--they originally were. (stupid me) I did forget to post the "guy version lyrics" above from a man's perspective--so NOW when you follow along, you will read it differently. Having said this, there probably is still a "feel" perhaps that the lyrics feel more for a gal--Glynda wrote most of them, and indeed she is a gal! But I really do believe the lyrical concept works for a guy as well, especially in more current times where I think it is just as likely for a guy or gal find themselves in this circumstance. It wasn't until after reading both your comments that I noticed the above posted lyrics were still the original from a gal's perspective--so I changed them to how they are being sung within the song -- should be now "less disconcerting" for the listener--Thanks both of you for bringing that to my attention!
I feel its clear "enough" about the "You" being God given the context used by following and modifying the direct question to God that begins that verse . It is true that a listener may not always get the "full" gist of a song's lyrics/story the first listen, and I'm fine with having a little mystery/ambiguity with lyrics--can peak interest IMO. Deej, the chorus lyrics are corrected--which should make more sense now, but regardless of gender, I like the harmony.
Thanks much guys for your comments, will always value and consider all sugs!
steady-eddie
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HI Eddie, Wow, what a beautiful joint effort. Sooooo smooth, thanks for sharing all this talent. Calvin http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart
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Hey Eddie,
I've listened several times over, and for me it's a miss.
I could explain further, but it's just not worth effort. There are a number of good elements here, but the song just doesn't gel. Perhaps trying a different arrangement ?
cheers, niteshift
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I enjoyed the song Ed and it was good to see Glyn's name on the credits also I'm at a loss with some feedback comments I see, thankfully this is a rare occurance! Why basically state I could help with this but nor, " its not worth the effort" Sorry I just don't get this. Travis
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Hi Eddie and Glyn, Floyd, and Colin.. I love so much about this. The vocal phrasing (and timbre) with that Gibb influence is wonderful, the harmonies great, and I wish I could double track my voice as successfully as you do here on a few lines. The lyric is so damn honest with lines like "I wish at times I had the courage; to tell her how I really feel/But the fear of being turned down; I'm not sure my heart could heal" that I was really empathizing with the singer. I love the direct modulation as well, and the production is great. I hear no volume issues..all in all a really lovely song and great production.. Mike
Last edited by Michael Zaneski; 01/19/18 02:19 PM.
Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice Fortune depends on the tone of your voice
-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon) from the song "Songs of Love" from the album "Casanova" (1996)
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Hi again, Ed (and Glyn by default):
I wondered if there might be a set of lyrics for a male singer? Believe me, I've done worse when posting songs at another site where I used to spend most of my time. Most of all, I wanted to mention today how much I miss Glyn's frequent posts. Last I heard, she had some pretty severe health issues and I'm hoping she is past all that and busy writing again.
After reading Mike Z's post above, I don't think I could have expressed my feeling about this song any better. Thanks again for sharing. ----Dave
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Calvin,
Thanks for tuning in-can always count on you to stop by, thanks!
Niteshift,
Sorry it didn't work for you. Thanks for the spin. Cheers.
steady-eddie
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Travis,
Thanks for the spin and the kind words. Glynda was very nice to work with--I don't see her much around here, but do see her on FB now and then!
steady-eddie
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Mike Z,
Thanks so much. I appreciate that you always give quality time for listening/assessing many of our poster's music within this forum. You are an inspiration to many here on JPF as well. You've been both helpful and kind to many, novice or pro--making us better at what we all try to do here--write better music, lyrics, and production tips.
Dave,
Thanks for the 2nd stop--I was SO FRUSTRATED when I posted the wrong lyrics initially! No big deal, and I may eventually have this song produced with a gal vocalist down the road anyway--but I did want this "posted version" lyrics to be male and match the sung lyrics--they are now of course. Thanks again!
steady-eddie
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Hey Eddie,
Long time. Nice to hear another from you. What really stands out for me in this recording, in a good way, is the vibrato in your vocal. I really enjoyed it. Don’t know that I ever noticed your natural vibrato before. Nice write. Another stand out for me was what I assume is Colin’s tasty super clean Tele, playing some really enjoyable licks. Nice job. Recording sounded good to me, though it began a bit abruptly.
Dave
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I responded on Soundcloud as to what a great mix this is, and then I see you had my old buddy Floyd help produce it. Smooth move. This sounds great. The vocal sits in that perfect place in the mix. Really enjoyable listen. Great guitar sound, too. Cheers.
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Hey Dave!
Thanks for your comments and kind words. You are right, this song does jump out of the gate a bit. I think initially it did have a longer intro, but Floyd and I wanted to keep the song as short as we could in the production aspect. But I will look and take a listen to see if that aspect needs addressed or augmented.
Glad to see you back around here, -- you know who's playing tonight on BTN................Buckeyes & Lions!
Thanks,
steady-eddie
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The other Dave!
Thanks so much for the spin and your positive feedback--involving Floyd is always an asset! I had originally produced this song with a 12 string acoustic guitar, which sounded okay, but just too hollow and didn't feel right with the piano tracks that I had. Floyd took the production a different direction, but I insisted Colin's tracks stay! Glynda wrote some tender lyrics, I might add!
steady-eddie
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The other Dave!
Thanks so much for the spin and your positive feedback--involving Floyd is always an asset! I had originally produced this song with a 12 string acoustic guitar, which sounded okay, but just too hollow and didn't feel right with the piano tracks that I had. Floyd took the production a different direction, but I insisted Colin's tracks stay! Glynda wrote some tender lyrics, I might add!
steady-eddie
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Oh yeah, great lyrics Glynda!! Sorry I forgot to mention that. They were super.
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A beautiful production Eddie Has that cool BeeGees feel to it. Always do a wonderful job with your vocals.
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Nelson,
I'm so glad you stopped by to give this one a spin!
"Our Mother's thank -you, our Father's thank-you, our sister's thank-you, and I thank-you!"
steady-eddie
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Hi Eddie: This had a 50's feel to me as well. Which I really like Love the production and I think you did a great job on the vocal. And the guitar (I assume Colin) sounded great. This is the third one in a row I've listened to that was about intense longing. And it's an overcast day here - lol a mood is being set.
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Scott,
Thanks much for the spin! Glad you liked it. Well its overcast here in E. Ohio, but that's the norm for late fall & early winter! Thanks for the kind words.
steady-eddie
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I think I have heard this one before! Sounding good and your vocals and phrasing are on the money. It's a shame unrequited love is so common in our world and this song captures it well so there should be a large audience for it.
BTW there is something familiar about that guy in the profile photo!
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Hey Colin,
Glad to know you remember working on this one! Thanks for the kind words. Yeah, oh to be that young again--I looked about like that the last time we saw each other in person--there's been some major changes! That pic taken outside our old stomping grounds at OSU across the street from Dracket Tower standing between two old apartment houses on Lane Ave. taken by a photography student that asked me spontaneously to take a pic for his upcoming class. He also was kind enough to ask for my address and I had forgotten all about it, and the following summer of 1970 received the photo in the mail!
Cheers!
steady-eddie
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eddie nice job on this song Floyd is one of my fav" s here, great song and performance to you both. Lane
"Blessed are the words of truth and fiction, one might save you from the other...Vincent
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Lane,
Thanks so much! Thanks from Glynda too--she started this project. Glynda.........where are you, come chime in! Yeah, speaking of Floyd.....where is Floyd? I wanted to utilize a BIAB production for something different with this song, in which Floyd handled that part of this production--he's a real asset to anyone's production. Everything here is BIAB except my vocals and Colin's riffs which I incorporated into the mix. Floyd...........we miss you around here......it's been ages! Lane, my collaborators all abandoned me! Colin did chime in however!
Best Regards,
steady-eddie
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Colin has a great song up too. I haven`t heard from Glyn for some time glad to see she is active. and always missed Floyd...He has that Ronnie Dunn voice he uses sometimes....lol your vocals in this are excellent. They will come back...just leave a bowl on the porch....lol say hi to Glyn for me.
"Blessed are the words of truth and fiction, one might save you from the other...Vincent
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Hi Eddie, (glynda, Colin, Floyd)
Ohh, glynda’s writing is so heartfelt, vulnerable and speaks the truth. She taps into emotions so naturally. The longing in the lyric is front and center and talking to God adds another layer that many can relate to I think.
The vocals sound really good...very tender...almost like whispering at times...and those harmonies are lovely. I like the melody and soft, gentle music. Effective pauses in places. It all sounds good together. Great group effort!
Kristi
A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be ultimately at peace with himself. What a man can be, he must be. -- Abraham Maslow, American Psychologist
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Lane,
Thanks so much! Thanks from Glynda too--she started this project. Glynda.........where are you, come chime in! Yeah, speaking of Floyd.....where is Floyd? I wanted to utilize a BIAB production for something different with this song, in which Floyd handled that part of this production--he's a real asset to anyone's production. Everything here is BIAB except my vocals and Colin's riffs which I incorporated into the mix. Floyd...........we miss you around here......it's been ages! Lane, my collaborators all abandoned me! Colin did chime in however!
Best Regards,
steady-eddie
By pure coincidence, I decided to drop back in for a while... Nice to hear this again. There has been so much music in the interim that I barely remember being involved in this...
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Lane, thanks again!
Kristi, thanks so much, always great seeing you on the boards, appreciate your thorough listening!
Floyd, Hey how go's it, good seeing you stop back around--thanks for your side of this production--I just inserted a little more power and re-did a few things on my end of this to hopefully improve upon it.
steady-eddie
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You did this nicely, Ed. There are some wordy lines but you managed them very well.
Vic
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Hey Eddie,
The guy/gal thing is no issue for me. I hear a sensitively written lyric of love unrequited.
I also hear it delivered by heartfelt vocals and backed by tracks that offer neither too much or too little for the mood.
I'd say more but I feel that Kristi stated my feelings far more eloquently than I'm capable.
It's great to hear you again and Janice and I took the opportunity to listen to many of your SC songs. Nice!!
J&B
Check out our new album Janice Merritt "Am I Blue Enough?" on Spotify, Apple Music, Pandora, Amazon and others.
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Hi Vic, thanks so much. Congrats on your air time with your song over the pond!
J & B, Haven't seen too much of your around, but always good to hear from you guys! Thanks much for your time and comments. The girl/guy thing was compounded by me "initially" posting the female lyric version without realizing it! I changed it to the correct guy version--but yeah, no question Glynda was thinking probably more from a gal perspective. I also feel the lyrics are unisex in nature as well.
steady-eddie
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