Bayou Hazard ©2017 Robert George BMI

Stole a car in Baton Rouge and did some time upstate
Learned a trade in metal shop while makin’ license plates
But when I got out I couldn’t find a job
From freighthandler to longshoreman, I guess ev’ry foreman
Was afraid of bein’ robbed

Then I heard two guys went missing in the bottomland
And sittin’ at a four-way stop gave me an awesome plan
Took a loan out from a shady friend o’ mine
Set up shop and started makin’ signs

Caution: Bayou Hazard
Danger up ahead
Use some common sense and
Take another route instead
Cos there ain’t no sidewalk and there ain’t no blacktop
Just a murky bog against a misty backdrop
And there’s critters lurkin’ in the peat moss
That’ll turn a man into a tangy meat sauce

If you’re lookin’ for a place to build an auto-mall
Best beware of voodoo queens with pins and burlap dolls
Pay attention to the sign and watch out what you do
Out there in the moonlit mire, she’ll dance around a fire
Then stab a doll that looks like you
And there’s pythons coiled in hollow logs
Big enough to swallow dogs

Caution: Bayou Hazard
Danger up ahead
Use some common sense and
Take another route instead
When that biker vanished in the quicksand
All that turned up was his helmet and the kickstand
And that poor disabled army medic
All the gators left was his prosthetic

Now you see them signs across the swampy south
Blood red with a skull inside a gator’s mouth
Some protestor thought one might be fun to loot
Poachers found his mask while makin’ python boots

Caution: Bayou Hazard
Danger up ahead
Use some common sense and
Take another route instead
Blame the city council…blame the mayor
Cos some critter ate a land surveyor
But good fortune blessed this former felon
Cos those crazy signs are damn sure sellin’

Caution: Bayou Hazard
Caution: Bayou Hazard…