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Mutlu
by Gary E. Andrews - 04/15/24 07:08 PM
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Joined: Jun 2005
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My Water-Coloured View (Neil Cotton)
I look at the photos in our fam’ly album Some make me smile like my Spaniel Chum Some make me cry thinkin’ how mom died Through laughter and tears I see a full life
Light through the tears Makes a rainbow of hues Life’s memories through My water coloured view Life’s memories through My water coloured view
Two colours remind me of my cute sister Sue In her cheering days wearing yellow and blue Red fills up my eyes when I see uncle Gil He stole dad’s cash to pay a gambling bill
Light through the tears Makes a rainbow of hues Life’s memories through My water coloured view Life’s memories through My water coloured view
My fam’ly’s a spectrum Raw & real emotions We sob when we’re grieving We weep celebratin'
Light through the tears Makes a rainbow of hues Life’s memories through My water coloured view Life’s memories through My water coloured view _________________________________
I look at the photos in our fam’ly album Some make me smile like my ol' Spaniel Chum Some make me cry thinkin’ how mom died Through laughter and tears I see a full life
Light through the tears Makes a rainbow of hues I see great years through My water coloured view I love all of these through My water coloured view
Two colours remind me of my cute sister Sue In her cheering days wearing yellow and blue Red stands for anger when I see my only uncle He stole dad’s cash lost it all when he gambled
Light through the tears Makes a rainbow of hues I see great years through My water coloured view I love all of these through My water coloured view
Life is a spectrum of Uncontrolled emotions We sob when we’re grieving Weep at celebrations
Light through the tears Makes a rainbow of hues I see great years through My water coloured view I love all of these through My water coloured view
Last edited by Neil Cotton; 11/10/17 01:03 PM.
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Thanks Barry, you're too easy LOL
Last edited by Neil Cotton; 11/08/17 02:05 PM.
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Makings of a good sentimental tear jerker
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
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Bwhahaha tear jerker , get it.
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Neil,
I really like the chorus on this song, and the "my watered colour view" refrain. Just two small suggestions for you to consider for whatever they may be worth.
First, I'm wondering if you can be more specific in the penultimate line of the chorus ("I love all these through"); maybe sub the "these" for something that more particularly ties that line to the subject of the preceding verse. It's just a thought, and not sure it makes sense.
Second, I'm not sure the last two lines of the second verse fit the mood of the song (which is always tough to judge just reading it). It overall appears to be a sentimental and affectionate tune; but the dishonest uncle seems a contrary image--i.e., how would that be part of the "great years" or something the singer would "love". I'd suggest staying with positive memories in the verses. Again, just my thoughts . . . hope they are helpful, and if not, please humbly disregard.
All the best,
Deej
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Neil,
I really like the chorus on this song, and the "my watered colour view" refrain. Just two small suggestions for you to consider for whatever they may be worth.
First, I'm wondering if you can be more specific in the penultimate line of the chorus ("I love all these through"); maybe sub the "these" for something that more particularly ties that line to the subject of the preceding verse. It's just a thought, and not sure it makes sense.
Second, I'm not sure the last two lines of the second verse fit the mood of the song (which is always tough to judge just reading it). It overall appears to be a sentimental and affectionate tune; but the dishonest uncle seems a contrary image--i.e., how would that be part of the "great years" or something the singer would "love". I'd suggest staying with positive memories in the verses. Again, just my thoughts . . . hope they are helpful, and if not, please humbly disregard.
All the best,
Deej
Your comments are helpful... "these" was used as a general reference to the photos and memories...maybe memories would be better...will look at this again. The Uncle is another tearful moment...maybe a tears of joy moment would be better...thanks again
Last edited by Neil Cotton; 11/09/17 08:55 AM.
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