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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 87
V
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I recorded this is one take on Thursday morning.

Would love feedback.

Watch It Fade.

http://valdavis.com/Watch-It-Fade-Rough.mp3

Watch it Fade (Anteros Eyes)

Copyright © 2017 Val Davis



He laid her down as to love her

In a gnomes bed in the new spring woods

Under a canopy dressed in sunlight

She brought him into her and it was good


And their love grew like the wildflowers

In an open space under the moon

But what has a start also must end

So it lasted from june to june


(Chorus)

Anteros' eyes would not gaze on them

Cupid's arrows didn't find their stay.

Though this love is big like the old grand canyon

Slowly in times' river ....watch it fade.


She wrapped herself in the family woven

And held on tightly to those tattered ends

She swore the comfort would not unravel

And together the fabric they would mend


In angers eyes she found her strength

To build a wall that would not fail

Eyes set forward onto the high ground

She set her self free and onto sail.


(Chorus)

Anteros' eyes would not gaze on them

Cupid's arrows didn't find their stay .

Though this love is big like the old grand canyon

Slowly in times' river ....watch it fade.


(Bridge)

Dust has settled on home forgotten

The barren place where life was made

Sometimes with eyes closed she does remember

Those lovely times by his side will not fade.


(Chorus)

Anteros' eyes would not gaze on them

Cupid's arrows didn't find their stay.

Though this love is big like the old grand canyon

Slowly in times' river ....watch it fade.

Last edited by Val Davis; 09/25/17 07:51 PM.

Val Davis
vald@valdavis.com
http://www.valdavis.com
Please have a listen today.
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Hey Val,i really like your playing and singing here.The song puts me in a good place but i would have liked the lyrics posted as it moved along kind of quick. Mike

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Mike, I did post them in the lyric forum. Let me know your thoughts.

thanks

Val


Val Davis
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http://www.valdavis.com
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Hello Val,

Nice to meet you & WELCOME to JPF !
You've got a good / clean sounding song here, although I think having a different musical treatment during the chorus would make it even better.

Calvin


GOOD GIRLS AND BAD BOYS..... http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/cands/0/calvinstewart

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This is awesome, Val. A beautiful, poetic story of lost love and your playing is wonderful. Only a couple of things...the sections (verse, chorus, bridge) are so tight, one after the other, that it might be nice if there was a little breathing room between them. And also, musically, a little more diversity wouldn't hurt, especially at the bridge. Just some thoughts. I enjoyed my listen.

Ricki

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Hello, Val. Love, really love the imagery you created. Your vocals and guitar accompaniment is smack on. No "nit" from sunny, humid and hot Montreal. Thank you very much for sharing this gem of a song. smile

Douglas


"Is this a practice? They are all practices." John Denver

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Hi Val,

Great picking and a distict memorable vocal sound and delivery.

The lyric invites further listening, as your style is layered and rather poetic, in an almost Bardic style, and it's quite good. smile

This is the work of a seasoned singer-songwriter. Excellent writing and performance..

Mike


Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice
Fortune depends on the tone of your voice

-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon)
from the song "Songs of Love"
from the album "Casanova" (1996)
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Val,

Love the guitar work—the opening pulls the ear. The vocal is inviting and gives the tune substance—but, to me, the guitar really carries this; nice picking. I like the stripped sound here—so wouldn’t add much more to it. All in all, really done.

Kindest regards,

Deej

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I like it! Reminds me of a sound from the seventies - maybe Yes..... Nice picking. I was a bit skeptical of the June Moon rhyme but it worked.

Good job.


Colin

I try to critique as if you mean business.....

http://colinwardmusic.com/

http://rosewoodcreekband.com/


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Hi Val

I really enjoyed this, lovely song and well performed.

Good work

Nigel

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Welcome to JPF, Val:

Zaneski said things pretty well for me. Simple well played guitar and your vocal was darn near perfect. It has a Peter, Paul and Mary feel with a modern folk vibe to my crusty old ears. Enjoyed the story told by this excellent song. Send more soon! All the best, ----Dave


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