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Joined: Dec 2016
Posts: 1,385 Likes: 1
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There's a lot more I'd like to do with this--some lead guitar and percussion to help it along--but it's beyond my skill level. So I'm gonna let this one go, knowing it would take years for me to figure out how to make it sound like I want. So it's raw, but I hope it's worth your listen. All the best, Deej. Long and Hard Way to Fall(V) You’ve got your diamond rings, your mansions and your fame. You’ve nailed your trophies to the wall. But get too caught up in your success your gonna wake one day with nothing left and that’s a long and a hard way to fall. (V) You like the party life, the late nights on the strip— wild sex and drugs and alcohol. But if you’re gonna speed through life that high, you better grow some wings and learn to fly because that’s a long and a hard way to fall. (C) You want your satisfaction, swear that you’ll never stop. You think your money grows on trees. You may have quite the view now high from your mountaintop. But when the bottom drops you’ll see it from your knees. (V) Well the ladies they all love your style, the crazy things you do, but you think they’re at your beck and call. Keep treating them like you go and do, they’re gonna knock you down a peg or two, and that’s a long and a hard way to fall. (C) You want your satisfaction, swear that you’ll never stop. You think your money grows on trees. You may have quite the view now high from your mountaintop. But when the bottom drops you’ll see it from your knees. (V) Well, the Devil has you in his grasp, and he knows a thing or two about making the proudest of us crawl. So you better give the Lord his due or he’ll kick you out of heaven too, and that’s a long and a hard way to fall. Yeah, that’s a long and a hard way to fall. Yeah, that’s a long and a hard way to fall. (c) Words and Music, DJ Lekich 2017
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Joined: Jun 2010
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An excellent write and very very cool performance.
This line stuck out... Keep treating them like you go and do,
I was wondering if you might try.
Keep treating them ......like you do, they’re gonna knock you down a peg or two
This song has a sweet swing to it... worth the listen, indeed.
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Joined: Aug 2007
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Liked it DJ.
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Joined: Apr 2002
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Joined: Feb 2005
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Mornin', Deej:
You said you had a few more "ready for the pipeline" and this one was worth the wait. I agree with your thinking that more instruments, backup singers, etc. would "spice it up".... but depending on where you want to take it, this song can stand on it's own two legs just like you performed it. Your vocal emotion sells the song... and those words flow well... just like the melody.
If you are looking for "nit picking" I'll meekly point out that the vocal does not follow the closing lines... and you were right to ignore the "a's" 'cause they don't need to be there. LOL! Yes, there are a couple of minor lyric changes you might consider but as I said, it's pretty darn good... just as you did it. I don't feel this one is "genre specific" the way you did it... could be modern country, rockabilly or even blues in a jazzy sort of way... but that's a great thing in my way of thinking. More artists from different singing backgrounds might be inclined to "cover it" in the style they are most comfortable.
I really enjoyed it (another "Burn Song") and wish you the best of luck. ----Dave
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Joined: Apr 2008
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Hi Dee, I listened to this and "left to soon" i`d be careful what I added, found myself waiting to hear the next lyric, not the next note. I hear a little in the background in this might be brought out a little, if you wanted..I think adding to much would take away from the songs and how they are set-up..I`ve read somethings around the site and I knew! these were going to be outstanding" lyrics before I clicked. Both of these songs work for me, Left to soon was a little more to the heart and I always lean that way...lol ok, I have to go back and listen to others now..I`ll leave notes. excellent work in my opinion Dee. Lane
"Blessed are the words of truth and fiction, one might save you from the other...Vincent
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Joined: May 2017
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I like this a lot. The lyrics flow really well and the "raw" performance works.
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Joined: Dec 2016
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Thanks Nelson, Martin, Calvin, Dave, Lane and Gavin, for taking the time to listen and comment. I felt good about the lyrics on this one--but really wanted to lay down some riffs and lead guitar to accentuate the tune. Sat on this one for a while and tried to work something in. But it's just beyond my guitar skills--as I'm just a strummer when it comes down to it. Nelson, thanks for the lyric suggestion. I suspect that the "go and" you're suggesting cutting out might break from the flow--but then again, sometimes a change up works. I'll give it a try and see how it hangs! Dave, it's rare I don't deviate a bit from the written lyrics when I play--just go with what feels right. I should go back and re-edit the lyrics to match the performance, but sheer laziness on my part. You make an interesting comment regarding genre, and I like that you think this one could embrace different styles. Thing is, most of what I write, I'm not sure fits any genre--but it's what comes out, and is what it is. Lane, appreciate the additional comment on "Left to Soon". My buddy played around with laying down some orchestra background, and the song would benefit from more of it. But I hear you're caution about adding too much. Sometimes simple is best. Best regards and thanks to you all, Deej
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Joined: Nov 2010
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Works really well deej. Nice riff thing going on. My only suggestion: try to trim down some of the lines. That's just my personal preference though.
Vic
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Joined: Jul 2006
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Hi DJ,
Strong "live" feel performance and great passionate vocals as usual.
Have you tried working with a click track, yet? Just curious if the tiny timing issues I'm hearing are due to playing with one or playing without one. I have friends who just can't play with one..bifurcating ones attention between the performance and the click can be hard..especially if that's a new thing for someone..
Because you go for a "live" and not recorded sound, the timing issues are not a big deal and this is a really strong outing for you, both as writer and performer.
Really nice work!
MIke
Last edited by Michael Zaneski; 09/20/17 09:51 PM.
Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice Fortune depends on the tone of your voice
-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon) from the song "Songs of Love" from the album "Casanova" (1996)
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Joined: Nov 2007
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Hi Deej - Hey I like that cat scratch rhythm at the beginning - maybe you could make a little break outa that - excellent write and sing - enjoyed the listen....Pete
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Joined: Dec 2016
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Thanks Vic and Pete--appreciate the listen and the comments.
Vic, I was on the edge regarding length of the lyrics. Structurally, two verses, a bridge, one verse, second bridge and final verse seem to work--but, yeah, even still it's a lot of lines. If it pushed beyond three minutes, I'd be itching to trim--but I hope it moves enough in three minutes to not wear down the ear too much. Good comment.
Pete, that cat scratch was just a way to kinda get me going into the tune. It came out sounding better than I expected. Nice call on thinking about incorporating into a break later on--that hand't occurred to me. I'll mess around with that and see what takes. Thanks for the suggestion.
All the best,
Deej
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Joined: Dec 2016
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Hi, Mike, Thanks for listening--I really appreciate your input. Following your feedback on one of my earlier efforts, I did try playing along to a click track--at least the feature that GarageBand has that I think is a click track. To be honest, it was a disaster--for all the reasons you note. "Distracting" is the right word for it--I'm either concentrating on playing with the clicks so much that I stop playing, or concentrating on playing so much I forget the clicks. And regardless I can never seem to sync up the click track with the tempo at which I want to play the song . . . and vice versa. I need to be more patient and work with it, I know, but alas . . . (sigh). I'd like to think if I had more hours in the day, I could figure it out--but I'll confess I'm not sure I'll get there. But we'll see. In the short time I've been posting here, I've learned so much already from everyone, so maybe there's hope for me yet! All the best, Deej
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Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 6,325 Likes: 4
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Excellent live acoustic track. I personally would not change a thing. Can easily see this performed live. Douglas
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Joined: Apr 2008
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Nicely done, DJ. If you're a performer, this would go down really well live. It's a foot stomper. Because of the quick pace, I think the lyrics could benefit from some trimming of excess words, just to give you room to catch a breath. Otherwise, well said.
Ricki
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Joined: Dec 2016
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Hi, Doug and Ricki, Thanks for stopping in and giving this a listen. Doug, I really enjoy what I hear from you; so your positive feedback means that much more. Glad you enjoyed it. Ricki, yeah, Vic called me out on the same thing--lots of words, and, yes, a lungful to sing. I either have to cut back on the lyrics or increase my cardio!!! That said, It kills me to let a good lyric go . . . so I guess that means more time on the treadmill. Thanks for the feedback--all the best to both of you, Deej
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