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#1120883 - 12/13/16 02:52 AM Come Alive (vocal)  
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 1,313
Tom W. Offline
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Tom W.  Offline
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Still a bit rough but I thought I'd toss it out there to see if the concept was a bit too strange before going any further. It's about a deranged stalker. Not a happy holiday song for sure but didn't have one in me this year so...

https://soundcloud.com/user-655800373/come-alive-vocal

I saw you walking through the park with him
Hand in hand...
Well after the darkness has set in
You'll never know exactly just how close I've been

I come alive when ever you're near me
I'm watching you where ever you go
To survive I dream of you daily
No one needs to know
How I'm walking behind you discretely
Just to catch a sent of your skin
I come alive and completely
Loose the world I'm in

Walking home alone... Or so you think
Just the thought of you not with me
has my senses on the brink
Desires unspoken penned in blood Instead of ink

I come alive when ever you're near me
I'm watching you where ever you go
To survive I dream of you daily
No one needs to know
How I'm walking behind you discretely
Just to catch a sent of your skin
I come alive and completely
Loose the world I'm in

You pull your shades so tight and set your clock
But wait...
Was there something that you might have just forgot
Could you have slipped and maybe left your door unlocked?




#1120888 - 12/13/16 10:14 AM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
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Calvin Offline
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Calvin  Offline
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Okeechobee, Florida U.S.A.
Beautifully done Tom


did I mention-----eerie !


Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

#1120896 - 12/13/16 12:08 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
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Tom W. Offline
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Tom W.  Offline
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Hey Calvin, I guess it's safe to say you know a little bit about writing "eerie" songs! Thanks for listening!

#1120900 - 12/13/16 12:42 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
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Paul Churchfield Offline
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Paul Churchfield  Offline
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Nashville, TN
The chorus is a rhapsody!!!
Like a musical buffet for all the senses.
Great job Tom!!!

#1120904 - 12/13/16 01:40 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
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Ricki E. Bellos Offline
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Ricki E. Bellos  Offline
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Wisconsin
I keep saying there aren't enough stalker songs these days, Tom, and this is an eerie one, in a creepy kinda way... grin ...not that there's anything wrong with that...

How I'm walking behind you discretely
Just to catch a sent of your skin

That is almost romantic when taken out of context but I like it, despite that.

I choose to believe his derangement won't escalate beyond his arms length obsession. Maybe a sequel, to ease my paranoia?

Ricki

#1120908 - 12/13/16 01:49 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
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Michael LeBlanc Offline
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Fantastic!The perfect lyric for this one.Mike

#1120910 - 12/13/16 01:58 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
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Ricki E. Bellos Offline
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It just dawned on me that these are the lyrics you put to the instrumental you posted the other day. DOH! Nothin gets passed me... grin

Yep, pretty much what I guessed it was about...said no one! Nice job with prosody, Tom. Music and lyrics are definitly working together.

Ricki

#1120918 - 12/13/16 07:00 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Paul Churchfield]  
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Tom W. Offline
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Tom W.  Offline
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Hey Paul, thank your for the kind words! I appreciate you taking time to listen and comment.

#1120919 - 12/13/16 07:04 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Ricki E. Bellos]  
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Tom W. Offline
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Tom W.  Offline
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Ricki, kind of wanted to leave the listener wondering if he took advantage of the open door. I guess that could play out in a number of ways... Maybe a sequel is in order. Lol! Thank you for listening!

#1120920 - 12/13/16 07:05 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
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Tom W. Offline
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Mike, appreciate you taking a listen!

#1120935 - 12/13/16 11:30 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 4,932
Michael Zaneski Offline
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Michael Zaneski  Offline
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California

Hi Tom,

Nice "Phantom of the Opera" vibe and "Diamonds and Rust" kind of guitar break. I like the atmosphere within, as well. The overall effect is rather pretty and Marillion like, and I love it.

Mike


Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice
Fortune depends on the tone of your voice

-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon)
from the song "Songs of Love"
from the album "Casanova" (1996)
#1120957 - 12/14/16 01:20 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
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David Gill Offline
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David Gill  Offline
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Buffalo, NY
THIS. IS. AWESOME!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!

I've always had a soft-spot for Alice Cooper and THIS SONG is reminiscent of some of his earlier works! I hear this as a dark rock ballad.

No nits. All respect! Well done!

Peace,

Dave


"Where there's a Gill, there's a way"
#1120961 - 12/14/16 02:13 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
Joined: Jan 2010
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vtoutlander Offline
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vtoutlander  Offline
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Tom,

This is great!! I love the creepiness of it... leaves the listener wondering "is this how those headlines start??"

The production was actually pretty smooth to my ear. I like the darkness.

John


#1120964 - 12/14/16 02:26 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
Joined: May 2015
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TC Perkins Offline
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TC Perkins  Offline
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Virginia
Very cool, this would sound great as a heavy rock or metal tune.

Pretty nice sounding production, too.

I think the concept and the lyrics are really good. You should definitely consider continuing with this one.

I liked it!

Peace,
TC

PS: loved the guitars

Last edited by TC Perkins; 12/14/16 02:27 PM.

If it has strings I will find a way to play it!

You can hear my tunes at https://soundcloud.com/tc-gypsy
#1120984 - 12/14/16 07:27 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Michael Zaneski]  
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Tom W. Offline
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Tom W.  Offline
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Mike, always nice to have you listen and chime in. Appreciate your thoughts!

#1120985 - 12/14/16 07:31 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: David Gill]  
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Tom W. Offline
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David, originally wasn't thinking Alice Cooper but I sopose the lyrics would fit. I saw Alice Cooper when I was a Kid at a place I'm sure you are familiar... The old War Memorial Stadium in downtown Buffalo. Always good to Hear from another long time suffering Bills fan!

#1120987 - 12/14/16 07:35 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: TC Perkins]  
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Tom W. Offline
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TC, funny you should mention metal bands. my son plays in a metal band called Dyceros and as far apart as our styles seem, we have found some common ground recently and may be doing something together. If nothing else... It should be fun!

#1120991 - 12/14/16 08:24 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
Joined: Aug 2006
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David Gill Offline
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David Gill  Offline
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Buffalo, NY
Hey Tom,

Wow... Yeah. Throwback indeed! smile And let's not talk about "The team that shall not be named ever again because 17 years!!!!" Jerks. LOL!!

GO BILLS!!!

Peace,

Dave


"Where there's a Gill, there's a way"
#1120993 - 12/14/16 09:20 PM Re: Come Alive (vocal) [Re: Tom W.]  
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 3,363
E Swartz Offline
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E Swartz  Offline
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 3,363
Ohio
Hey Tom,

This is really different, but definitely very cool. Absolutely riveting lyrics that really fit the music vibe. If there was one thing that I thought (maybe) could enhance this song, would be the addition of some instrumentation in the chorus--more orchestra like a James Bond soundtrack. This would dramatize the chorus even more. But that's just expensive polish, not a nit--this was fabulous!

steady-eddie.


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