en Eulogy - Just Plain Folks Music Organization Message Boards
leftleftbyleftbyleftbyleftbyleftbyleftbyleftbyleftbyleftbyleftbyleftbyleftbyleftbyleftalt-1 alvt">
The Seeds Would Grow
by beechnut79. 09/08/21 12:14 PM
The Winner
by beechnut79. 09/08/21 12:14 PM
Envious Heart
by beechnut79. 09/08/21 12:10 PM
The Voyager
by Gerry. 09/08/21 07:05 AM
"Not Just A Melody.".
by JAPOV. 09/07/21 09:51 PM
This old dog
by beechnut79. 09/07/21 10:54 AM
How Fast Are You Going (When You're Standing Still
by beechnut79. 09/07/21 10:40 AM
Lazing in the Sun
by beechnut79. 09/07/21 10:35 AM
"I Need A Cadillac....Jack!"
by beechnut79. 09/07/21 10:33 AM
Pedal & Synth Expo Oct.2-3, 2021 Free, Outdoors
by Gary E. Andrews. 09/06/21 02:24 PM
Resource List (In Progress)
by Brian Austin Whitney. 09/06/21 12:40 AM
Blending Political Discourse, Conspiracy Theories,
by WilliamMahler. 09/05/21 09:49 PM
Eco-Heroes Contest, Artists, Lower Emissions
by Gary E. Andrews. 09/05/21 01:16 PM
"How Songs Get Cut" with Rand Bishop
by Gary E. Andrews. 09/04/21 08:54 PM
Rivers of Destiny
by Bill Draper. 09/04/21 07:59 PM
my recording set up
by Bill Draper. 09/04/21 06:00 PM
They Live On
by rpirone. 09/04/21 05:51 PM
leftTop Posters(All Time)left
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Rate This Thread
#1088623 - 08/01/15 03:38 AM Eulogy  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
Would appreciate any feedback you might offer on my newest song and recording. Thanks a bunch.

EULOGY
Music & Lyrics by David S. Becker
©2015 David S. Becker Music
All Rights Reserved

https://soundcloud.com/gocartmoz/theres-a-light-in-my-life-wip

INTRO
VERSE 1
Well we spoke of his life
While the pain
Oh it cut like a knife
And we fought
Through the tears and the words
As they led him to the light

VERSE 2
And did he watch from above
I hope he knew
Just how much he is loved
My darkest days
Well they'll always shine bright
When I see his guiding light

CHORUS
Political brawls
Goofy ... birthday calls
Now just memories
To share
A family treasure
Is somehow measured
In praise
And solemn prayer
As we drown in our despair

VERSE 3
Now there's a light in my life
I know he's there
Through the struggle and the strife
I can feel it
As he grips my heart
And tugs with all his might

ORCHESTRAL INTERLUDE
CHORUS


BRIDGE
Daddy can you hear me
I'm calling out your name
I wish you were here with me
My life won't be the same
It won't be the same no

CHORUS
VERSE MUSIC FADE OUT


Last edited by GocartMoz; 08/10/15 01:07 PM.
#1088632 - 08/01/15 04:16 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,142
IronKnee Offline
Top 500 Poster
IronKnee  Offline
Top 500 Poster

Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,142
Hawaii
Originally Posted by GocartMoz
Would appreciate any feedback you might offer on my newest song and recording. Thanks a bunch.

EULOGY
Music & Lyrics by David S. Becker
©2015 David S. Becker Music
All Rights Reserved

https://soundcloud.com/gocartmoz/theres-a-light-in-my-life-wip

INTRO
VERSE 1
Well we spoke of his life
While the pain
Oh it cut like a knife
And we fought
Through the tears and the words
As they led him to the light

VERSE 2
And did he watch from above
I hope he knew
Just how much he is loved
My darkest days
Well they'll always shine bright
When I see his guiding light

CHORUS
Political brawls
Goofy ... birthday calls
Now just memories
To share
A family treasure
Is somehow measured
In praise
And solemn prayer
As we drown in our despair

VERSE 3
Now there's a light in my life
I know he's there
Through the struggle and the strife
I can feel it
As he grips my heart
And tugs with all his might

ORCHESTRAL INTERLUDE
CHORUS


BRIDGE
Daddy can you hear me
I'm calling out your name
I wish you were here with me
My life won't be the same
It won't be the same no

CHORUS
VERSE MUSIC FADE OUT


Wow Dave...this has got to be one of your best. Just an awesome listening experience.
My hat comes off to you, bud!

The bridge is brilliant, both musically and lyrically. GREAT singing. You really channeled the emotional vibrato in a powerful and meaningful way.

GREAT stuff!
-Tom

#1088649 - 08/01/15 11:07 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: IronKnee]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
Thx for giving this a spin Tom. I am glad you liked it.

Dave

#1088653 - 08/01/15 11:28 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 6,780
Vicarn Offline
Top 40 Poster
Vicarn  Offline
Top 40 Poster

Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 6,780
UK
Nicely written Dave.
The instruments sound crisp.
I would up the lead vocal by about 1-2 db.
Also, try to eq out some of the muddiness on vocal too.

Vic


It's never too late? Yes it is, so do it now.

If, given time, a monkey can write the complete works of Shakespeare maybe there's hope for me.

http://store.cdbaby.com/cd/vicarnold2

http://www.soundclick.com/vicarnold

http://soundcloud.com/vic-arnold

#1088671 - 08/01/15 05:13 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: Vicarn]  
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
Michael LeBlanc Offline
Top 10 Poster
Michael LeBlanc  Offline
Top 10 Poster

Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 13,325
Louisiana
Absolutely wonderful!Such a heartfelt lyric and a top notch performance.Mike

#1088685 - 08/01/15 05:52 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: Michael LeBlanc]  
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 3,691
E Swartz Offline
E Swartz  Offline

Top 100 Poster

Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 3,691
Ohio
Dave,

Beautiful write, cool arrangement/melody. I would like to hear harmony on perhaps three or four lines in the chorus--not opening two lines and let the last line be lonely without the harmony. Experiment using the harmony for accenting certain chorus lines rather than complete change up, your chorus will not seem as abrupt, yet still lifting IMO--which is only that and certainly not necessarily right. Every song is different with when and how much harmony is best, I usually record several harmonies, than experiment pulling certain ones out for better effect.

I like the orchestra interlude, a bit different from you with your guitar abilities! Nice to produce and arrange differently isn't it!

Nice song here Dave, great lyrics too.

steady-eddie.

#1088701 - 08/01/15 08:17 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: E Swartz]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
@Vic ... Thx for giving this spin Vic and much thx for the suggestions, ALways appreciated.

Dave

#1088702 - 08/01/15 08:30 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,521
Janice_and_Bud Offline
Top 200 Poster
Janice_and_Bud  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,521
Southeastern USA
Wow, that was an emotional ride. The arrangement,
the lyric and the vocal really pull the listener
in and holds him/her there. instrumental tracks,
the write, the vocal, the arrangement and the
mix are all really strong.

Kudos...this is powerful. Look forward to more
listens on our SC fav playlist.

J&B


Check out our new album Janice Merritt "Am I Blue Enough?"
on Spotify, Apple Music, Pandora, Amazon and others.
#1088706 - 08/01/15 08:52 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: Janice_and_Bud]  
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 763
Doug Healey Offline
Top 500 Poster
Doug Healey  Offline
Top 500 Poster

Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 763
Anaheim calif. Mickey Mouse
Holy smoke Dave! That's the best I've heard from you, or most everyone aboard here! Very moving write and performance!
All the best my brother.
Doug


Learn all the musical rules inside and out- Then break 'em...
Grace..Peace...Love

#1088714 - 08/02/15 01:47 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: Doug Healey]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
@Michael .... Thx much for giving this a spin Michael. GLad you enjoyed it.

Dave

#1088720 - 08/02/15 09:02 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
@Eddie ..., Thx as always for the listen. Great ideas and suggestions as always. Interesting that you focused on the chorus. After writing the song and starting to record it, I realized I had written it in to high a key for me to sing the chorus like I wanted to, but felt the key for the verse was right for me. When I write I Kind of sing under my breath. It is only when I record that I first try to belt it out. The chorus became quite the work in progress as a result. Thx again,

Dave

#1088728 - 08/02/15 10:57 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 19,839
Calvin Offline
Top 10 Poster
Calvin  Offline
Top 10 Poster

Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 19,839
Okeechobee, Florida U.S.A.
Hi Dave,

WOW-this is impressive, keep up the good work.
emotional vocals !!

Calvin


http://www.soundclick.com/bands/0/calvinstewart

#1088732 - 08/02/15 11:18 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: Calvin]  
Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 838
Todd Strachan Offline
Top 500 Poster
Todd Strachan  Offline
Top 500 Poster

Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 838
Detroit Michigan
Great song Dave, both lyrics and music. Really hits home. Thanks for sharing this!

Todd


Everything we have has come from you, and we
give you only what you have already given us!

1 Chronicles 29:14


www.soundclick.com/toddgstrachan
#1088783 - 08/02/15 08:39 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: Todd Strachan]  
Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 2,616
Nelson Offline
Top 200 Poster
Nelson  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Jun 2010
Posts: 2,616
Baltimore, MD
Masterful intro, Dave.
A beautiful write and brilliant overall performances.

Lovely ORCHESTRAL INTERLUDE...... fits in perfectly.

Awesome Chorus and emotional vocals

Well Done

#1088807 - 08/02/15 11:29 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: Nelson]  
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,831
Dave Rice (D) Offline
Top 30 Poster
Dave Rice (D)  Offline
Top 30 Poster

Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 7,831
Texas
Impressive work, Dave:

I like your arrangement of the song you wrote and played so well. Could it be better? Sure... in a high-dollar studio with megabucks backing you and a team of "experts" in all the right areas... but I enjoyed it just the way you did it. Don't let this one slip away. It has great potential... just like you.

----Dave

#1088817 - 08/03/15 10:21 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: Dave Rice (D)]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
@Janice & Bud ... Thx so much for the listen and kind comments. Always appreciate it

@Doug ... Thx as well for the ears and your very kind comments. They made my day. Appreciate the listen

Dave

#1088822 - 08/03/15 11:41 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 964
90 dB Offline
Top 500 Poster
90 dB  Offline
Top 500 Poster

Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 964
Florida
Beautiful stuff Dave.

"As we drown in our despair" is a great line, and your vocal puts it over the top.

Regards,

Bob

#1088851 - 08/03/15 06:11 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: 90 dB]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
@Calvin & Todd ... Thx for the listen and comments. I am glad you enjoyed the song.

Dave

#1088855 - 08/03/15 07:41 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 8,490
Lisa Gundling Offline
Top 20 Poster
Lisa Gundling  Offline
Top 20 Poster

Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 8,490
Hi Dave,

Tragically powerful ... and.just beautiful!
I remember your father was ill.
If this is about him, and you lost him ... I'm so sorry for your loss.

Lisa

#1088871 - 08/03/15 10:43 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: Lisa Gundling]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
@Mr. Nelson and Dave - Thank you both for your time and kind words. They are greatly appreciated.


Dave

#1088874 - 08/03/15 11:42 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 6,894
Ricki E. Bellos Offline
Top 40 Poster
Ricki E. Bellos  Offline
Top 40 Poster

Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 6,894
Wisconsin
Hi Dave,

Very well played and a powerful lyric to go with the beautiful music. V2 could be even stronger if you made it all in present tense, like this.

As he watches from above
I hope he knows
Just how much he is loved

Just a thought. Nicely done,

Ricki

#1088887 - 08/04/15 06:53 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: Ricki E. Bellos]  
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 12,183
Travis david Offline
Top 10 Poster
Travis david  Offline
Top 10 Poster

Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 12,183
Kendal, Cumbria .UK
Yes I go a long with the other comments too Dave.excellent song all round.best of luck with it.
Travis


We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars. Oscar Wilde
#1088895 - 08/04/15 10:36 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: Travis david]  
Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 3,710
Dan Sullivan Offline
Top 100 Poster
Dan Sullivan  Offline
Top 100 Poster

Joined: Jul 2010
Posts: 3,710
MI
Dave, real good song. The beauty of the music turns this reflection on the passing of a loved one into a benediction. The "drowning in despair" line was a jarring intrusion to the mood. I'd replace it with something gentler. Maybe something to do with a holy prayer. Still, it's a fine piece of work.


Write from your heart, not what you think others want to hear.

https://dansullivan2.bandcamp.com

http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/dansullivan2
#1088905 - 08/04/15 11:35 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: Dan Sullivan]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
@90db .... Thx for the spin and comments. They are always appreciated.

@Lisa .... Thx for your thoughts as well. Thx also Lisa for your condolences. This song is about my dad, but just as much the outpouring of love by those that spoke at his funeral of the impact he had on their lives. He passed away at the end of June. You may remember a previous song I posted entitled My Daddy's Eyes, written as he was dealing with his long suffering health issues.

Dave

#1088954 - 08/04/15 09:29 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
@ Ricki ... Thx for giving it a spin and excellent suggestion on the lyric. Appreciate it greatly.

@Travis .... Thx as always. Appreciate the extra set of ears

Thx again

Dave

#1088965 - 08/05/15 03:33 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 5,578
Little_stevie_b Offline
Top 50 Poster
Little_stevie_b  Offline
Top 50 Poster

Joined: May 2001
Posts: 5,578
Hickory, North Carolina USA
Hi Dave,

I've pretty well sworn off social media but a friend on this site told me over the phone about your song and how great it was so I hajavascript: x()d to check it out. Glad I did.

This is so well laid out in so many ways. Great lyric and music, yes but the vocal delivery and it's emotion sells it. I really like how your arrangements have evolved since I've known you here. The guitar work was always stellar and now you've added the dimension of bass with it and orchestral elements.

The one thing I would suggest mix wise is the tree chimes seem too much out front. They should be more subtle IMO. I'm going to send you a pm on some other thoughts.

This is really well done. Take a bow, my friend.

Steve



I'm the only person here who is not unique.
#1088966 - 08/05/15 04:51 AM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,109
Michael Zaneski Offline
Top 50 Poster
Michael Zaneski  Offline
Top 50 Poster

Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 5,109
California
Hi David,

This is a very ambitious production and it's mostly excellent. I would lower the volume of the wind chimes somewhat, and add more reverb to them; also, you can hear the "keyboard action" on the strings during the solo, and I was thinking maybe they'd sound better more in the background and with a tad more reverb to disguise their virtual-ness.

The lyric is so personal and vulnerable..very beautiful writing, and a moving lead vocal to match.

Mike


Fate doesn't hang on a wrong or right choice
Fortune depends on the tone of your voice

-The Divine Comedy (Neil Hannon)
from the song "Songs of Love"
from the album "Casanova" (1996)
#1089008 - 08/05/15 07:55 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: Michael Zaneski]  
Joined: Jul 2013
Posts: 1,985
floyd jane Offline
Top 200 Poster
floyd jane  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Jul 2013
Posts: 1,985
Tampa
Dave,

This is truly wonderful. Spectacular!

Your vocal is all it should be. The production is super.

As other have said, probably your best ever! Big time solid.

This song is WAY too good for the "cut like a knife" line - that is so overused (cliché) and this song is anything but!!!!

floyd

#1089114 - 08/06/15 11:37 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: floyd jane]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
@Dan ... Thx for the comments Dan ... They are greatly appreciated.

Dave

#1089155 - 08/07/15 01:39 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
@Stevie ... Thx much for the listen and comments Stevie. It is greatly appreciated. Thx also for the great suggestions. I look forward to giving them a try.

@Michael ... Thx as well for the listen and input Michael. It is greatly appreciated.

Dave

#1089368 - 08/10/15 01:49 PM Re: Eulogy [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
GocartMoz Offline
Top 200 Poster
GocartMoz  Offline
Top 200 Poster

Joined: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,559
Florida
@Floyd ... Thx so much for the comments and listen. Always appreciated.

Dave

/forum/forumhttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.jpfolks.com%2Fforum%2Fubbthreads.php%2Ftopics%2F1088732%2Fre-eulogy.html
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.6.0