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#1053959 - 07/22/14 04:11 PM A Lesson Learned  
Joined: Feb 2013
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GocartMoz Offline
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GocartMoz  Offline
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Hey all ... Would love some feedback on my latest. I hope all is well with everyone. Thanks for listening and commenting, if you so choose.

Music & Lyrics by David S. Becker
Produced & Performed by David S. Becker
(c)2014 David S. Becker Music
All Rights Reserved


The writing's on the wall
I can hear my teardrops fall
And as my life comes crumbling down on me
I heed your call

Son, the wonder of it all
To watch you grow from someone small
There's no regrets
Each breath's a lesson learned
Can't you see the memories on your wall
Live to tell
This lesson learned

I know that movin' on's not easy
But it's the price we pay to breathe
Each day's a lifetime filled with memories
Well son you live them
Or you leave
Choose to live
This lesson learned

Well son the beauty of it all
You were once so tiny now so tall
So many smiles
To wash away those tears
A friend to catch you when you fall
Live to tell
This lesson learned


When you wake up in the morning
And when you go to bed at night
Each time you look into the mirror
I'll be beging you to fight
It's a lesson learned

A lesson learned

Last edited by GocartMoz; 07/22/14 04:19 PM.
#1053965 - 07/22/14 04:34 PM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: GocartMoz]  
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Calvin Offline
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Calvin  Offline
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Good to see ya in here.

You're sounding good.

This is nice....

I know that movin' on's not easy
But it's the price we pay to breathe

And your solo is real COOOOOL



#1053968 - 07/22/14 04:52 PM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: Calvin]  
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Bill Osofsky Offline
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Bill Osofsky  Offline
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Sounding good, Dave. Really liked this one


#1053987 - 07/22/14 07:03 PM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: Bill Osofsky]  
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Vicarn Online content
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Nice one, Dave. Original sounding.
I like the musical change in verse two.

It's never too late? Yes it is, so do it now.

If, given time, a monkey can write the complete works of Shakespeare maybe there's hope for me.




#1054009 - 07/22/14 08:41 PM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: GocartMoz]  
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Tom W. Offline
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Pretty song here! Still hearing that chorus in my head. Love how this song grew and developed as it progressed. Guitar sounding awesome btw! Nice write!

Tom W.

#1054019 - 07/22/14 11:23 PM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: Tom W.]  
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GocartMoz Offline
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Hey Calvin and Bill,

Thx for the listen. I am glad you enjoyed it.


#1054020 - 07/22/14 11:44 PM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: GocartMoz]  
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Ricky Layne Offline
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This song really grew on me the more i listened
Love the guitar work in verse 2.
Solo works great
I thought the bridge was good. .. maybe a bit too long.

Nice lyrical choices and subject for this song.

Solid work to be sure!


#1054023 - 07/23/14 12:06 AM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: Ricky Layne]  
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E Swartz Offline
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Hi Dave!

What a really cool song! It didn't take long to feel like I was riding on a horse through the meadow at a nice easy canter--that's how this music and rhythm made me feel--would be a great scene song in a movie. You have a great talent for music/melody/flow.

Do I have any nits or thoughts? (Is the Pope Catholic)? Hey, no real nits, but a couple thoughts or ideas for consideration:

I was thinking about what Ricky said about the Bridge. I don't think it's too long, but it may "feel" longer due to how it summarizes musically. I might experiment having it build to a music cliff hanger, rather than capitulate or summarize--in this way I think it would allow the chorus to launch better. I'm not sure without hearing it, but I'm getting that feeling that it may work--proof's always in the pudding!

With this song's music rhythm, I think I prefer to hear it just fade--but I could be a little too old school. Dave, another great write from you, nice going!


#1054024 - 07/23/14 12:27 AM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: E Swartz]  
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Michael LeBlanc Offline
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where's the tip jar?This is def one of my faves of yours Dave.Everything about does it for me.Mike

#1054035 - 07/23/14 03:00 AM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: Michael LeBlanc]  
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Bugsey Offline
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Sounds great, so many different influences going on here.

That's what u call easy listening.

#1054071 - 07/23/14 12:10 PM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: Bugsey]  
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GocartMoz Offline
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GocartMoz  Offline
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@Vic and Tom ... Thx much for the listen and comments, it is always appreciated.


#1054082 - 07/23/14 01:31 PM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: GocartMoz]  
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Cool song.

I did not understand the Intro. It did not seem to relate to the rest of the song - I found myself wondering about it the whole time. But no one else has mentioned it - so I must be missing something...

The rest of the lyric is terrific "lesson learned" stuff..

The production is nice. The acoustic guitar during the verses is a bit "too bright" (IMO, of course). When the chorus hits, it blends in nicely - almost like you have different eq settings in the verses. I think the verse acoustic ought to sound the way the chorus acoustic does. In your bridge, the acoustic on the left (the strum) is a bit too loud. The picked on the right is just right. (ALL the guitar playing is excellent). It's just levels...

Very enjoyable. Great job on the arrangement.


#1054169 - 07/24/14 08:54 AM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: floyd jane]  
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GocartMoz Offline
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@Ricky ... Thx for the listen Ricky. It is greatly appreciated.

@Ed ... Thx as well for the detailed crit. Definately hear you on a better transition from Bridge to final chorus. I also am going to experiment with the ending a bit.

@Michael ... Thx for the comments Michael. In as much as the virtual tip jar is empty, I could always use a donation.


#1054214 - 07/24/14 01:44 PM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: GocartMoz]  
Joined: May 2010
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TamsNumber4 Offline
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New Hampshire

Love the music in this, great guitar. Nice lyric, I agree the intro wasn't necessary in my mind, love the bridge. Very nice song!



Words are, in my not-so-humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic. Capable of both inflicting injury, and remedying it...
Professor Albus Dumbledore

#1054372 - 07/25/14 12:43 PM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: TamsNumber4]  
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GocartMoz Offline
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Hey Bugsy and Floyd. Thanks much for the listen. It is greatly appreciated. Floyd, I hear you on the levels. That will get attention on a remix for sure. As far as the intro, I think your are talking lyrically about not getting it? Obviously it needs changing if it is not understood. What I was going for is that the intro is sung from the adult "son's" perspective. The "son" was obviously facing some difficult issues in his life and was at a crossroads. The verses, chorus and bridge are sung from the "parents" perspective in "teaching the lesson" so to speak. Anyway, that was the thought. Not sure it worked.


#1054379 - 07/25/14 01:44 PM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: GocartMoz]  
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Jan Petter Offline
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Jan Petter  Offline
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Hi David ,
First of all , I really enjoyed the listen and performance . There was a
spot I could not not understand musically , the intro choir part does not IMHO
bring anything to the song in fact it separated the feel when the rest of the song hits in . IMO try the intro without that choir part . Your lead vocal works very well
but when you sing in harmony the second vocal struggle wich is a bit distracting .
And remember this is just my opinion :-))

All the best

"You have to react to what's around you in the moment, whatever the music is.
Just think of it as some place you have to enter and you need to find the key."

#1054508 - 07/26/14 12:10 PM Re: A Lesson Learned [Re: Jan Petter]  
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GocartMoz Offline
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GocartMoz  Offline
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Thx Tammy and Jan for the listen. It is much appreciated. Jan, a few that have listened to this didn't like the cheesy synth choir. I really liked it, but it is growing tired and I may indeed take your advice on giving it the axe. I did struggle on the harmony part and need to clean that up, as well. Thx for chiming in.


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