Originally Posted by Steve Altonian
Since you are still in revision mode I'm only gonna share random thoughts. No way to get a true Chorus here out of your ONCE IN LIFE ? Have you tried? That line/verse/bridge or whatever you are calling it expresses a theme for the song better than YOUNG WOMAN of course that is IMO.

I would try to write a Full Chorus and build the tune out that way. But that's just me

I'd also shorten that intro to say 8 seconds....Also see the red on the lyric below

Just a few thoughts...

Good luck with this...Sounding good

Young woman (Revised)
Mimmo Mercurio/John Scunziano

She was a young Woman...of only twenty-three...
I was married, and twice as old as she
I Drove her home, from work one night
She put her arms around me... And she held me tight

She left the city went to finish school
Then to San Francisco to try something new
I think so often of that summer night
She held me tight and kissed me...then she ran inside

Once in life, if you're one of the lucky few
Fate will step in and... True love will come to you
Seldom in life will you get a second chance
A second chance... At true romance (I would find another line instead of second chance again, you just said "a second chance". That is wasted real estate)

I did not see her for a few long years
She came back, and was happy to be here.
We talked a long time and reminisced
Parted ways without a single kiss

Life is full of twists that can't be known
Sometimes seeds of love are never sown
Planned to chat when we had some time to kill
To share a coffee, but I'm waiting still
Once in life, Once in life,
Once in life
it would be hard to get any more added to the song without rebuilding the whole structure...The music track was done a wile back, no seps available unfortunately. Beleive it or not I was going to call it "Once in life" But in the end I chose "Young Woman " instead.

Thanks, Steve, for listening and for your thoughts on this.

Mimmo

Love Song...And More

https://soundcloud.com/domenic-mercurio

https://www.facebook.com/domenic.mercurio.14

https://www.facebook.com/Domenic-205648812881069/